PAMIJANE

SparkPoints
 

The continuing saga of Pami Jane...in poetry. Feedback from my friends and team? :)

Saturday, March 08, 2008


The Dark Sonnet Of Pami Jane
(Iambic pentameter) 2/8/08
by Pami Jane Tennant
Contest Of Regents OR King & Queen



There is a sea, vast and deep inside me
one I've been drowning in for many years,
Something hides there holding me in dark glee;
even from the pain of my own sad tears.

Mountains and tons of flesh that cover, hide
the ME I am supposed to, and should be.
Hard as rock, heart of stone? Did I decide
how could I? to do this thing to me?

Now at forty eight I'm knockin' down the gate
using faith, as a catapult aflame!
Break now down, the door of shame and self hate;
the urge to give in to the game of blame.

Life, need, is here, fully alive within
I'm going to make this work and I WILL win.


Some days are so much harder to get through than others. This is one of them. I have a huge massive boil under my belly the size of a golf ball under the skin. I've had it once before and it's in a very bad area because it's right above my intestines. It's too painful to mess with and the first time it came I couldn't do anything about it then either...just had to let it go down on its own. I can't exercise, I can barely walk the pain is so intense! So I have to work at not falling off the wagon I've built here. I must not allow myself to give in to the pain and start the endless bout of emotional eating, and I must fight the depression that comes with this hitch. I will do it. I must do it. I can't keep letting things get in my way. The boil won't last forever, I must just bide my time and continue to eat right. I can do this, I am doing it and by God's grace I WILL DO IT.

Thanks for putting up with my whine...:-)

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • NANCYJEAN6
    Pami, Sorry to hear about all your going through, you'll be in my prayers. Take care of yourself, turn it over to the Lord for he cares for you and wants you healthy and well again.
    Poem was streight from your heart, & touched mine!!!
    Nancy!!
    4586 days ago
  • LEANVIXEN
    Awww I hope you get better soon. I know it's tough sometimes to stay on track with exercise, especially when you're in physical pain. I guess that's where good diet can help compensate. You can do it, I know you can!
    I love the poem! Great job
    4587 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1248739
    I'm so very sorry to hear of the hitch in your giddyup. You will make it through; you have all of us and Him to lean on. Let us be your strength when you don't feel like you can do it. You are NOT alone.

    You can do it!

    (Hugs)

    Kami
    4587 days ago
  • NEWCREATION517
    Pami, this is just a bump in the road... You will get through this and you will be victorious! Trust in the Lord, allow Him to comfort and steady you, and this will soon be just a fading memory... There is a NEW YOU to fight for, and by God's grace, I know you will win!! Love & Blessings ~ Kristin
    4587 days ago
  • GIS_JEN
    I hope you get to feeling better soon. Stay strong! You can do it!
    4587 days ago
  • MINEGA
    Thanks for sharing and opening up - Don't let this be your excuse to not do the right thing. The addict in me is always looking for an excuse - don't let this be the one. Keep on keepin' on - remember your goals - what are they? picture them and work towards them!! I know you can do it!!

    Hugs,
    Robin
    4588 days ago
  • AKAYCAT
    You can do it. HOLD ON TIGHT to the edge of the wagon. My son had a boil on his butt once. THAT was awful - before we found out we were not supposed to pop it - we did. It was soooooo nasty - and the screams were even worse. I like your poetry - I am glad you are going to win.
    4588 days ago
  • NOMI_822
    Positive Thinking sweetie, I am so sorry you are in pain is there nothing that you can do for it? My mom used to get boils every once in a while and she used to put a warm moist compress on it. She said it helped it drain. She had one particular one that had to be lanced but she said it was too painful to do that again so she started using warm compresses. Hope you are feeling better soon. Have you looked it up in the health section? Feel better soon, Hugs!!!
    4588 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.