A Week of Deprivation = One Evening of Binging

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Ugh, I'm sitting here still feeling the mental and physical pain of stuffing myself silly.

I ate my dinner as planned - but I *doubled* the quantity. Then within an hour, I ate a giant bowl of popcorn with melted margarine plus about half a cup of chocolate chips. My stomach is aching and I feel like a failure.

What was I thinking? I was feeling deprived and drained and I just wanted a "night off". On top of the food I ate, I skipped my planned workout tonight. Yes, you read right: I stayed home from the gym in favour of eating a ton of garbage instead. Double whammy of self-destruction.

Okay, enough of the self-pity. I think I know why this happened:

1.) Every day this week, I wasn't satisfied with the food I ate. I realized that I switched from a hot, thick soup or stew for lunch to a cold salad with only walnuts for protein and no starch for a stick-to-the-ribs effect. Consequently, every afternoon, I was unsatisfied and pre-occupied with food. This snowballed into my temporary insanity this evening. What they say is true: depriving yourself backfires.

2.) This has been a long week. I worked long hours (about 12 hours each day) and I also got up early to exercise. I've found that being tired during the day leads to cravings which leads to the feeling of deprivation. And I now know that deprivation backfires! Also, working long hours, prevents me from spending quality-time on SparkPeople, which I find motivating!

So, where do I go from here? I fix the problems and move forward.

A coworker lent me a excellent book today: "Fresh From The Vegetarian Slow Cooker" (and actually, every recipe is vegan). So, I'll be making a couple of hearty soups and stews for the week: with lots of filling protein and fibre. I'll be going back to my old routine of eating my largest meal at lunch to get me through the mid-afternoon slump and straight through to dinner (which I'll keep light).

My next issue is the fatigue. It's hard to change my work schedule, but at the same time, it's easy for me to slip into a routine of working longer and longer hours. Not because I have immediate deadlines, but because I tend to get neck-deep into projects that I could work on 24-hours a day / 7 days a week. I need to keep work-life balance in mind.

Well, just writing this blog has helped me refocus and feel like I can move forward after this slip up. I'm officially shaking it off. I know that the extra food tonight will not ruin my efforts so far AS LONG AS I don't let myself slide down the slippery slope.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I have the same book.

    It's no wonder that you're struggling, with all that overwork. It's really impressive that you do find the time to exercise and eat healthfully.

    It sounds like you you have a plan to deal with your difficulties, and that's what important.
    Good for you!
    4239 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/17/2009 11:33:22 AM
    I tend to skip the gym when I binge too. It's like some evil side of me wants to make it as naughty as possibe. I don't know why I do it! You're right...just move forward.
    4263 days ago
  • TESS504
    Identifying the problem is the key to fixing it, and remember it's only one day. Even Biggest Loser have a cheating day. emoticon
    4264 days ago
    Don't worry about the binging today... its only one day - it won't kill your diet. At least you realize where you went wrong so you can fix it. Tomorrow's a new day and you can start fresh again :)

    Good luck, and I hope the fatigue issue gets better for you (I'm having the same issue!)
    4265 days ago
  • JLITT62
    Sounds like a good plan (and that is a good cookbook, btw).

    Really, figuring out why we do what we do -- and coming up with a plan -- is 3/4 of the battle.

    I like to make a big pot of soup pretty much ever week during the fall/winter. It's easy, it's filling, and gotta love a one pot meal.
    4265 days ago
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