Easy day

So today I took it easy. My legs feel like they have used muscles that haven't been used in the last 10 years. They hurt in places they have never hurt before lol. I guess that's what running at 269lbs will do for ya. Oh well. It will get better over time. I wrote out my plan last night just to find out that my plan wouldn't be able to work...well at least not how I thought. Which is fine. I have to re-do it tonight. And I set my new goals. I will post them later. They are on a paper right near where Avery is sleeping and I am not trying to wake him up. So I will have to remember to do that later. As I was writing my goals, my husband was sorta looking to see what I was doing and then he saw my final weight was gonna be 168 (not my goal exactly but just what I came up with based on the week it will be in my journey). He could hardly believe what I wanted to get to. And on top of that he is so blown away by the fact that I was out running last night LOL. He couldn't believe I did it the day before either. It is like he has all of a sudden noticed that I am focused and it isn't on him, its on me. Not that I don't love him and not that I don't care about us and what we need to do to fix our situation. But I need to work on me and there is nothing that will stop me right now. I need to be strong inside and out and these changes are gonna get me there. And who knows, maybe as my confidence increases our relationship will reach new places. We will see.

Anyway, I got off track. Back to today. I walked 1.09 miles and did it in 26 min, putting me at 2.5mph. This is not fast but I went for the whole thing with Erica. And we talked the whole time about her latest obsession which is heaven and cemeteries. She always asks a ton of questions about God and baby Jesus and Heaven. But she just became aware of cemeteries and they freak her out a little. It was really hard to try to explain death to my 4 year old, but I think I did good.

Anyway, we talked a lot about that and we talked about why it is important to be healthy and strong. She is aware of my goals sorta. She knows that the length of time it takes to do our walks is important. She knows that mommy has to weigh in on the scale. She knows that Mommy's tummy is too big and that is why we are exercising. She is very aware of good food and bad food. Not sure if I want her to be focused on it right now at this age, but she is starting to be. She weighs herself everyday and gets very excited about it. And she is just as into the time on our walks as I am. I am glad she is doing it with me cause at least I can assume she will grow up knowing that exercise and healthy eating are important.

Ok, well I have babbled enough for today lol. Tomorrow will be a training day for me so expect that I will be sore! But also you can expect me to be excited about it. Good night for now my dear friends.