day seven

Monday, August 03, 2009

well. i'm on day seven. officially one week in.

i dont feel any different, other than the fact that i have found support and dont feel like i am completely in this alone, you know?

i woke up really hungry again this morning. any insight into why i might feel like this in the morning? it doesnt make sense. i ate a TON of food yesterday, on top of what i had blogged about earlier in the afternoon. i dont understand how my body could still be hungry when i wake up if i filled it with JUNK before i went to bed. i woke up this morning and it took everything in me to eat fruit and a water instead of scarfing an entire box of donuts... i STILL feel like i want to.

why is it that when we 'crave' food we crave TERRIBLE food?! why can't i crave spinach or corn or watermelon, why does it have to be chocolate, and candy, and carbs?!

i just want control over this. i either take too much control or not enough... this is how my weight fluctuates so much. for example. on saturday i was 121, now today i'm 125. how can i make this stop? its usually when i start feeling like this that i turn to diet pills to suppress my appetite but thats not healthy and its most likely contributing to my lack of control... i need to do this on my own, without any cheats or fake pharmaceuticals with awful side effects - - - but i'm at the point of despair and desperation. how long will i even have the control to say no to what i know is bad.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I know this post is kinda old but I wanted to tell you that I do the same thing. I was 123 lbs yesterday morning, and this morning I was 125 lbs ; so I decided it was water weight and lack of exercise on my part. So I took laxatives so I can balance this weight gain into a weight loss. I hate using methods like this too..but I'm at the point of despair and desperation too.
    3746 days ago
    Are you tracking your food? I've found that to be a big help in that it makes you accountable for what you are eating.

    From what it seems like, you need to find a better balance. Who says you have to have fruit and water for breakfast? If you are craving something with more substance, have it - just make sure it's not a whole box of donuts.

    I really recommend food tracking. If you are really struggling, try following the suggested meal plan and see if that works better.

    3850 days ago
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