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The stresses of life!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

I can't believe this past year. It feels like I've been inside a vacuum, with stresses holding me in and sucking me under in all directions and all the prayer in the world isn't helping. I hate to sound so negative, but I'm feeling quite lost right now.

1 1/2 years ago, my middle daughter moved in with me (w/2 kids), then moved out again in April, only to have my oldest daughter move in with me, then my youngest daughter, followed suit. So I started charging them rent (or education - they could live with me for free if they were in school full time and all they'd have to pay for is their own expenses like phone, toiletries, food, etc.) So the oldest moved out in August and the middle daughter moved back in in December. You get the yo-yo picture here? Each child brings their own stresses and wants mommy to spend quality time with them, which I dont mind, but wheres the time for me? Meanwhile, I'm an emotional eater. And over the course of the past year and a half, I've gained 38 pounds back. I've also learned to ride a motorcycle and have taken it from Tucson to Colorado and back. I've put on over 10,000 miles on it so far.

I pray and pray and pray, that God would help me. Please, let my children move out on their own and pay their own bills and live independant of me. But nothing happens. I finally made the decision to stop expecting them to meet the emotional needs I have that are making me gain weight in the first place. I know the skills. I have the power that God gave me. I have the tools. I wonder if God's up there saying, you have what you need...use it! So I came back with my tail between my legs, having to admit my failures and facing my fat face once again. So far, I've lost 5 of the pounds I've gained and I'm praying for God to help me lose the rest. I hope He does...I pray He does...I believe he will.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CARD512002
    emoticon
    275 days ago
  • TOMATOCAFEGAL
    Hope this finds you still praying and doing good!
    343 days ago
  • EMGERBER
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    1232 days ago
  • MILPAM3
    All the prayer in the world isn't helping? I beg to differ. If you're praying, you still have a relationship with the Heavenly Father, and you are still bringing your needs to the foot of the cross. Perhaps when you take your burdens there, you are returning too quickly and snatching them back.
    Learn to recognize what a mind battle is...that niggling unrest brought about when Satan reminds you that God isn't doing things your way or working fast enough on your behalf. He IS working for you...and teaching you patience in the meantime. He has to work with your daughters as well, you know.
    Did it ever occur to you that your daughters are returning because they see YOU as the strong, dependable, stable one? Be what they see and they will learn to be the same. It is the older women written about in the Bible who were the mentors, the teachers, the examples. Be confident that as you have learned (and are learning again), you are teaching others.
    emoticon

    2105 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/24/2014 4:47:12 PM
  • PENOWOK
    Good for you for standing at the throne and asking for mercy. I believe He is who brought me to SP. I frequently pray that he will take away my desire for certain foods or keep me so busy I don't have the time. You can take control back, but only with the grace of God can you be really successful. WE have to lean on HIm. Find a Scripture verse (I like John 3:30) and post it by your emotional foods
    2109 days ago
  • EMACFAR
    I think it is amazing that you are able to provide a loving home for your adult children to come to when they need their mother's love and support, without compromising their learning responsibility and independence. You make it clear they are always welcome but it is not a free ride and they must continue to support themselves as adults. I know God gives you strength in this!
    3931 days ago
  • INDIANAGIRL61
    You are going to be ok. God is answering your prayers you just haven't seen the results you were asking for. You're right HE knows YOU have the skills and tools you need. Use them. Find your inner strength that won't let your emotions get the best of you. Learn to deal with the REAL issues that trouble you. We can't keep going back to overeating and drowning our conflicts in a carton of ice cream or we won't ever get better. Confront your deepest feelings. What are they? Sort them out. What is the outcome that you wish to see? What needs to be done to get there? Take control and get started. I think that God might be waiting!
    3937 days ago
  • GINYAN
    Have faith, the prays are working. Think how bad it could have been without the prayers. Sometimes God has us go down rough roads so we realize what we have that's good in our lives. Every trial has a lesson; some lessons take us longer to learn than others. I have the something going on with my oldest son, he his GF and son are back at home and some days I just want my house to myself. I have faith that God will give them wings SOON, (sounds like a red bull ad) but I love having my grandson around, he is such a joy. Where are the parenting books when these darlings become adults???? Life is stressful, but it's worth it. Hang in there, it will get better.
    3942 days ago
  • BARBARA_G
    I went through the same thing with my daughter moving in and out. And it was a big stresser so I know where you are coming from, especially with three of them and grand kids too! I'd be eating also... I hope you manage to make this workable for everyone involved.
    3942 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4519295
    I was feeling so stressed in my own life after coming home from work. Then I clicked on your blog. You have so much more stressors than mine pales in insignificance.
    God does give us all of his strength and power as we tap into it. We must daily lean on him.
    I tend to want to help out my kids too much too. Consequently, my finances at times are in a pinch. You and I need to let our own grown children support themselves and learn to lean more on God themselves rather than us!
    You can get back to making good choices and taking care of yourself too!
    Thanks for sharing as it helped me evaluate my own failings.
    Blessings,
    Sandy
    3943 days ago
  • BOBBI1968
    You're so right - you need to think about yourself. You can do this!
    3943 days ago
  • LEEDZ09
    Keep praying, never give up, this will pass, you can make it, God wouldn't give you something you can't conquer emoticon
    3943 days ago
  • FLYINGTOFREEDOM
    keep going. God will help you. You do have the tools. Keep at it and you will succeed.
    3943 days ago
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