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Getting Ready for the Week Ahead

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Hello Dear Spark Friends,

I have been busy all day today working around the house. I cleaned out several cabinets and boxed up some items that I won't be keeping after we move to smaller quarters. We have our house for sale and I might as well get started with making some decisions. I have so many nice things... just too many of them to keep them all! Moving out of a 4,000 sq ft house makes for some hard decisions. My DH saw piles of stuff on the kitchen counter and asked what I was doing. I said this pile is for eBay (Waterford crystal) , this pile is going to garage sale (misc glassware), and this pile we will box up and sell later. He looked it all over and nodded and took just one item out and asked me to keep it (which of course I did). He is the type of guy that really appreciates nice things~ but knows if you don't use it or have room for it that it just becomes a burden.

As many of you know, this has been quite a year of ups and downs for me. I lost my job (of 36 years) in June. I was Chief Credit Officer for a community bank that was acquired by another bank 4 years ago. They left us as a stand alone subsidiary for 3 years and then started the process to integrate us into the "mother" organization. All policies, procedures, reporting channels, etc were disrupted and changed. Several people in my department left and with remaining staff trying to cope with new procedures on top of the work-load the overall morale was poor. I was working long days and was at the office almost every week-end. It wasn't a good situation however it was still a rough departure for me. Losing my job meant a big change for me and the DH economically. We decided to put our dream home up for sale and as we are in the midst of the worst housing market in history it will be hard to sell. We will hope that we get a buyer in 2010 as my DH will not be able to retire until we have the house sold. In the meantime, we are making ends meet and have cut our expenses whereever we can. I don't want to whine about this however as I know that there are many many people truly suffering in this economy and we are managing.

Next up my daughter's marriage fell apart . She went through a lot of turmoil and needed a lot of emotional support. Even though she was the one who wanted a divorce it was still rough. Thank goodness the worst of that is over and she is now feeling much better and her situation has stabilized.

Next up was the situation with my brother. He lives in Manhattan and recently was diagnosed HIV positive. His health has deteriorated to the point where he can't work at present. My sister and I decided that if he was going to get better he needed hands on support and he needed it now. I will be making my 3rd trip to NYC in as many months next week-end and will be there with him for 3 weeks. (I live in Oregon) My sister has been there with him for the past 3 weeks and she has made a lot of progress getting him on his medication, eating nutritiously and building up his strength. I will continue to work with his eating program and will get him to the gym working out. His next visit to the doctor is Dec 3rd and hopefully he will be improved to the point where his doctor will give him the okay to go back to work. As you can well imagine, living in Manhattan isn't cheap. We have helped him as much as possible but if he can't get back to work he will have to make some tough decisions. I will be in the City with him over Thanksgiving so if the weather cooperates I will plan to see the Macy's Parade. I'll blog more about the trip and his progress over the next month.

Through all of this stress and turmoil, there is something however that I am very proud about. I have been able to keep my weight under control. I haven't lost much the past six months (maybe a couple of pounds), but I'm exercising more than ever and feel strong. Spark People has been a HUGE help to me keeping me active and focused on making healthy choices so my weight hasn't yo yoed. Thank you my dear spark friends for all your support and know that you do make a difference.


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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    3960 days ago
    My prayers are with you too. I hope maybe you will get a chance to enjoy the parade next week.
    3960 days ago
    Rhonda, what a year you've had, and you've handled it with such grace--being there for others and taking care of yourself along the way, which is so important for balance but NOT an easy feat. You have my sincerest best wishes, particularly for your brother--a fellow New Yorker--and I hope he's feeling strong and you enjoy your time with him in this amazing city. You're an insipiration!
    3960 days ago
    You are truly an amazing woman. Through all of your trials, you have continued to inpsire and motivate others when you could have just drawn the blinds and had a well deserved pity-party. I am totally awed by your attitude and courage and I pray that a multitude of blessings will come your way - for you and for your family.

    3960 days ago
    You have so much going on in your life. I'm amazed that you can keep it together. One thing is clear, you have an incredible family that supports and loves each other.

    My prayers go out to all of you but in particular to your brother. I'm glad you and you sister are able to help him out. I know what it meant to me when my sisters helped me out during my sickness. I felt so cared for and I'm sure he feels the same.

    And lastly ... size 4 jeans ... wow ... Life is Good!

    3960 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/17/2009 10:58:07 AM
    Oh my dear friend Rhonda...you DO have a lot on your plate right now. But being the super woman that you are I know you will go flying through it taking one step at a time. You are an amazingly truthful woman and I'm so grateful that our paths have crossed. I'm much in the same boat about the big dream house and the miserable economy in trying to sell to downscale. I too am an owner of 'stuff' and I love beautiful things and the pleasure they bring! But stuff is just stuff and you can't take it with you right? So I'd rather be rich in currency with the love and compassion I build up in my bank account of the heart!

    You have a HUGE savings account there dear one! Huge!

    Hugs to your daughter...I remember my divorce as the one most painful, awful experience of my life...and I too was the one that wanted it...but sometimes I think the guilt that brings is almost as hard as the one being left.

    All in all as long as we have family and friends we have EVERYTHING we need. Hugs and love to your brother..how lucky he is to have a sis like you..he will get stronger, and he will survive and I now you will be in his corner every step of the way. Stuff him full of fruits and veggies and get him on the green lemonade...faboulous for rebuilding the immune system! I posted it on one of my blogs but if you can't find it just give a shout out..and I'll get it to you!
    3961 days ago
    My prayers go out to you and your family. I hope your brother's strength gets a little better with the help and comfort of you and your sister helping him out through this situation, and helps strengthen him knowing you both are there by his side.
    3961 days ago
    Congrats on holding your head above water and staying busy doing the things that need to be done.

    My prayers are with you.

    C. Rosie
    3961 days ago
    I want to send you my Prayers for you and your family.
    I hope your brother is able to feel better and you have good strength
    while you are with him.

    3961 days ago
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