I'm back

Saturday, March 27, 2010

For some reason my computer has not allowed me to post for a whole week. Suddenly success.
Last weekend I spent three days in a motel. I saw my new grandson, who refused to open his eyes once. He is healthy. Parent a little tired. I am so proud of my youngest son. He has stepped up and has been a wonderful help to his wife both in labor and delivery and at home. He is attentive and protective. Had a hard time getting a chance to hold my grandson. I include Anthony so he didn't feel left out. Each time I visited I took him with me. He told my son that the baby has an older brother that he was going to be in Benjamin's life and look after him since I couldn't always be there. My son actually took it in stride and didn't reject Anthony's statement of being his big brother.
I took my rott Mara with me.. She was a jewel. I've been training her to help me with my disability and she did fantastic. Every harness, cape or set up I put on her she was great. She did garage sales, church everything but the pool at the hotel with me.I know now why god created an instant bond between us and that I had to get her from the abuse she was surviving in.I wish her two pups had survived. There loss still saddens me. I didn't want to return. I enjoyed the experience and returning to hell was hard. I am back in nightly lock up for about 12 hours a day. I can only handle the put downs and everything being wrong with the world being my fault for so long a day and then I get tired of fighting to be a worthy person.
I thank god everyday for my finding this website and the friends I have found here.
Benjamin Thomas at one week old
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • _MAOMAO_
    He's beautiful and he has a classic name, worthy of one of our founding fathers.

    I'm so glad that Mara's doing so well. She is gorgeous! emoticon

    I'm sorry that coming back 'home' isn't so much fun. emoticon
    3827 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6063397
    If this was your 1st.Grandbaby--- I wish you many more...
    Beautiful blessing Gift from Heaven to all of you...
    Enjoy every moment w/baby and make Memories.... emoticon
    3840 days ago
    What a beautiful baby. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
    3840 days ago
    Nice and healthy! I always had a thing for chubby cheeks!!
    3840 days ago
    Wow a beautiful baby. So precious! How nice it must be to be a grandma! Glad you and Mara had a good trip, she was a great help. Wish you didn't have to be back in the situation at home. You are in my prayers.
    3840 days ago
  • ENUFF81020
    Hi there,
    Your new grandson is gorgeous--er, handsome! I m glad that you and Mara got a much needed break and I wish that you wouldn't have had to come back to your situation either. I hope that you are feeling ok and that you can stimulate your mind and spirit with positive thoughts and new learning while you are in your room.
    I'm glad that you found SP too. I am rooting for you to come out of all of this in a positive light. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3840 days ago
    WOW Grandma, you have a beautiful little darling and precious, a blessing from God to you and his parents. So glad that you got to spend more than a day there.
    Sounds as if Mara enjoyed it to..........
    Keep on looking for that way out of your situation. You need to be where you feel safe and secure for yourself and your Rotts.......I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers constantly.
    3840 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/28/2010 10:41:25 AM
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