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Choices

Monday, April 12, 2010

I CHOSE to binge this past Monday due to a frightening experience which triggered fear and rage.
After 39 days(yeah,that's right-thirty-nine) of no meat nor pork I went out and bought a bucket of rib tips and pork links ,mild sauce,came with fries and bread.I devoured that food in two days .
On Tuesday,I determined that I damn sure needed some cardio and it needed to be chall-
lenging even with modifications.Did Jillian's ,Burn Fat,Boost Metabolism,since I was feeling pumped I did Petra Kolber's ,Cardio for Beginners - the 10" segment and a 20" segment of Biggest Loser Strength and Sculpt w/Bob and 10" ST workout on Prevention's Personal Training.
Afterwards,I felt empowered and happy that I took back control.Was hungry but I grabbed chicken breast and made a quick salad,apple,raw cashews and H2O.
I remember the time when that bucket of rib tips would have been my carte blanche to eat every fat-laden food item I could think of and in massive portions.
What stopped me was thinking of a song Luther Vandross, recently deceased R&B singer who died from complications from diabetes,performed .

"If you always do what you've always done;you always get what you've always got."

Instead of burning gas to drive to the store to pick up "junk food" filled with mega-doses
of sodium and lab created flavors with which my taste buds have had more than a passing
fancy I chose to do something different..I chose to think differently about my binge.
I chose not to feel guilty and sad and let those negative feelings and thoughts tell me that I will never be able to achieve my goals.
I chose not to let the negative thoughts convince me that it would be easier to go back to driving places within 10-30 minutes of walking distance instead of filling my water bottle,put-
ting one foot in front of the other ,and feeling more energized and alive because of the fresh air that's causing me to breathe more deeply.
I chose to change my route to/from the library,staying on high-traffic streets,becoming more aware of my surroundings so that I feel safer when going to access the web since my PC is down.
I chose NOT to change my plans to wait until the Fall to get a new PC.I'm going to continue to walk wherever and whenever I choose instead of giving in to fear and anxiety.

I was supposed to start walking outdoors last Summer. I can't tell you that if my PC had n't started giving me trouble that I would have started walking outside ,at all.This small step is
helping me make more strides in the right direction.

Last Monday,I weighed in at 206 by Saturday I weighed 203.6 and as some have been known to say on The Biggest Loser--I was hoping for more ,but I'll take it.
I will take it happily because I took the negative and flipped it so that I could get a positive outcome that I can choose to build upon.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • VEGANLINDS
    I absolutely love that quote you shared! It's one of those I really need to keep in mind along this whole journey. Because I've been doing things the same way for a LONG time!

    Good luck with all the walking you'll be doing this summer! That is admirable you're going to wait till the fall to get a new computer!
    3667 days ago
  • RIPPEDPAUL1
    good recovery
    3698 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3363447
    So, are we glad your PC broke or. . . :-) Good job getting back on track and putting one foot in front of the other.
    3699 days ago
  • SHARON-2020
    Yeah for you! Reboot immediately! That's what I am doing moment by moment! We Can Do This...Together!! emoticon
    3699 days ago
  • CARRAND
    Great blog. You slipped up, but you got back on track. That is terrific! Be proud of yourself.
    3699 days ago
  • LAURAWILLBEFIT
    Great blog!
    It's great that you can see where you were and where you are now!
    Yes, I know you will get to your goal!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3699 days ago
  • STARLIGHT05
    Congratulations!! I think getting back on the horse after a setback is one of the hardest things to do. So is keeping a small setback small, and not letting it bloom into a big setback. Changing a negative attitude to a positive one is a great step to weight loss and overcoming any other challenges!!

    I'm sorry you had to go through your frightening experience. It might be wise to invest in a can of pepper spray - I got mine at an army/navy surplus store, I'm not sure where else they would be available. It definitely makes me feel safer. They even have them in disguised packaging - mine looks a lot like an oversized lipstick tube.
    emoticon
    3699 days ago
  • JKTENTATIVE
    What a great blog! You have certainly achieved an important milestone in your journey. Congratulations on managing to act like a skinny person. (I am of the opinion that skinny people eat fattening things, but they don't continue that for a week). And, emoticon on the weight loss.
    thanks for sharing your inspiring words!
    3699 days ago
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