Monday, April 12, 2010

I CHOSE to binge this past Monday due to a frightening experience which triggered fear and rage.
After 39 days(yeah,that's right-thirty-nine) of no meat nor pork I went out and bought a bucket of rib tips and pork links ,mild sauce,came with fries and bread.I devoured that food in two days .
On Tuesday,I determined that I damn sure needed some cardio and it needed to be chall-
lenging even with modifications.Did Jillian's ,Burn Fat,Boost Metabolism,since I was feeling pumped I did Petra Kolber's ,Cardio for Beginners - the 10" segment and a 20" segment of Biggest Loser Strength and Sculpt w/Bob and 10" ST workout on Prevention's Personal Training.
Afterwards,I felt empowered and happy that I took back control.Was hungry but I grabbed chicken breast and made a quick salad,apple,raw cashews and H2O.
I remember the time when that bucket of rib tips would have been my carte blanche to eat every fat-laden food item I could think of and in massive portions.
What stopped me was thinking of a song Luther Vandross, recently deceased R&B singer who died from complications from diabetes,performed .

"If you always do what you've always done;you always get what you've always got."

Instead of burning gas to drive to the store to pick up "junk food" filled with mega-doses
of sodium and lab created flavors with which my taste buds have had more than a passing
fancy I chose to do something different..I chose to think differently about my binge.
I chose not to feel guilty and sad and let those negative feelings and thoughts tell me that I will never be able to achieve my goals.
I chose not to let the negative thoughts convince me that it would be easier to go back to driving places within 10-30 minutes of walking distance instead of filling my water bottle,put-
ting one foot in front of the other ,and feeling more energized and alive because of the fresh air that's causing me to breathe more deeply.
I chose to change my route to/from the library,staying on high-traffic streets,becoming more aware of my surroundings so that I feel safer when going to access the web since my PC is down.
I chose NOT to change my plans to wait until the Fall to get a new PC.I'm going to continue to walk wherever and whenever I choose instead of giving in to fear and anxiety.

I was supposed to start walking outdoors last Summer. I can't tell you that if my PC had n't started giving me trouble that I would have started walking outside ,at all.This small step is
helping me make more strides in the right direction.

Last Monday,I weighed in at 206 by Saturday I weighed 203.6 and as some have been known to say on The Biggest Loser--I was hoping for more ,but I'll take it.
I will take it happily because I took the negative and flipped it so that I could get a positive outcome that I can choose to build upon.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I absolutely love that quote you shared! It's one of those I really need to keep in mind along this whole journey. Because I've been doing things the same way for a LONG time!

    Good luck with all the walking you'll be doing this summer! That is admirable you're going to wait till the fall to get a new computer!
    3910 days ago
    good recovery
    3941 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3363447
    So, are we glad your PC broke or. . . :-) Good job getting back on track and putting one foot in front of the other.
    3942 days ago
    Yeah for you! Reboot immediately! That's what I am doing moment by moment! We Can Do This...Together!! emoticon
    3942 days ago
    Great blog. You slipped up, but you got back on track. That is terrific! Be proud of yourself.
    3942 days ago
    Great blog!
    It's great that you can see where you were and where you are now!
    Yes, I know you will get to your goal!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3942 days ago
    Congratulations!! I think getting back on the horse after a setback is one of the hardest things to do. So is keeping a small setback small, and not letting it bloom into a big setback. Changing a negative attitude to a positive one is a great step to weight loss and overcoming any other challenges!!

    I'm sorry you had to go through your frightening experience. It might be wise to invest in a can of pepper spray - I got mine at an army/navy surplus store, I'm not sure where else they would be available. It definitely makes me feel safer. They even have them in disguised packaging - mine looks a lot like an oversized lipstick tube.
    3942 days ago
    What a great blog! You have certainly achieved an important milestone in your journey. Congratulations on managing to act like a skinny person. (I am of the opinion that skinny people eat fattening things, but they don't continue that for a week). And, emoticon on the weight loss.
    thanks for sharing your inspiring words!
    3942 days ago
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