Friday, May 07, 2010

Yeah it happened again. I went in for my nerve test you know the one I have been waiting for since before 2010 and after getting there and waiting I found out the machine was not working AGAIN ! Is there a hidden message here. Am I not to get this test / Maybe I am not ready to handle the answer. If this test shows the nerve is bad, I will not get my knee replaced. What will I do then, how will I handle that sort of news. I have personally dreaded that that may happen. All my future plans and dreams revolve around getting my knee replaced and being more mobile and independent where I could move out and get a new life for myself and rottweiler's. I am physically struggling and pushing myself often way beyond my limits for this goal. I feel there has to be a reason for this and I can't come up with a positive spin on this. Doctors office didn't call and cancel because the tech was suppose to call back and fix it before I got there. Test has not been rescheduled and now I don't know whether to see ortho surgery or reschedule his appointment on the fourteenth trust my neurologist and would hate to use another one but may need to. This whole thing has been weighing heavy on my mind and is not resolved.
Bankruptcy paper work all completed and due to be delivered to court trustee this week. Hurray. One goal accomplished at least.
Tomorrow I make a day trip back to my old stomping grounds to see Anthony play soccer. So far this season his team has lost every game and hasn't scored even one goal. I hope by offering moral support he'll enjoy the game for the sake of the game and not be competitive where he feels he has failed because they loose. He needs self esteem .I could use a hug and some positive too. I gave Mara a bath today because grandma said she smelled on our last visit. There house is so dirty and cluttered there was really no way to tell but it gives her one less thing to complain about and I do take Mara everywhere with me and planned on giving her a bath when the weather warmed up anyway.
Trying to hang in there and stay positive in a world of chaos and crap going on around me.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    When you have your knee surgery, you will be down for a bit. In planning on where to go, you may need someone to come in and feed the dogs. Have you considered maybe figuring out how much you could pay to be a roommate to someone wanting to cut the costs of their utilities by having a roommate?
    You can earn a few dollars by writing for Associated Content; but once you write the first 6 articles, it is harder to get them to purchase what you write.
    You are still in my daily prayers.

    3797 days ago
    Just keep hanging on to the positives and know that soon your life will be different. I'm still praying for your miracle.
    emoticon Kathleen
    3798 days ago
    Friend -- I keep forgetting ask -- regarding your knee -- is it possible you could make use of the Synvisc injections in your knees that replaces the worn away cartilage??? Would that help put off the knee surgery for awhile??? More later, Hugs, Echo emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3799 days ago
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