"Pausing" to "choose" to "admit".....I WILL Find a Way
Tuesday, June 08, 2010
This is not really a blog. In actuality, I don't blog. This is something that I read and felt strongly about though. If anyone reads this, that has not yet, then I hope it changes your mind set and re-directs your thinking like it has mine.
Thanks to Jules on our team page for sharing this!
Got a minute? That’s long enough to learn how to talk
The Wt. Loss Minute By Linda Spangle, RN, MA
Author: 100 Days of Weight Loss
Great idea: Build self-esteem by changing what you say
Dieters have always had their own special language. See if this sounds familiar. ‘I did great with my diet all weekend. But at lunch today, I CHEATED, and then I BLEW IT the rest of the day.’
‘I was so GOOD all morning, but this afternoon, I was really BAD. Sometimes, I just CAN’T resist temptation. And when I have a bad day, I CAN’T stay on my diet.’
These stupid words never seem to change your behavior. Instead, they reinforce your sense of failure and often make things worse. Starting today, change your vocabulary by eliminating these five phrases and using healthier ones instead.
I blew it!
Whenever you say I BLEW IT in response to an eating slip-up, you give yourself a message of discouragement and failure. Those words also prompt you to think, ‘Since I blew it anyway, I might
as well continue to eat. I’ll just start my diet over tomorrow.’
But then a minor eating slip-up becomes a major food binge. Not only does one mistake ruin your current plan, it also negates your previous weight-loss efforts.
One dent isn’t enough
Beverly described how she would use an eating binge to punish herself for times when she blew it.’ She said, ‘It’s like I backed my car into a post, but instead of quickly assessing the
damage and driving away, I decide that one dent isn’t enough. So I keep slamming my car backward into the post over and over topay for my first mistake.’
Call it a PAUSE
Practice viewing a slip-up as a minor event, not a crisis. If you eat something that’s not on your plan, don’t beat yourself with harsh, punishing words such as ‘I blew it.’ Instead, label the incident as a ‘PAUSE’ in your program.
This gentle word doesn’t make detrimental references to your personality or your ability to accomplish a goal. Simply say, ‘I had a brief pause, but now I’m back on track.’ Then let go of the behaviors in your ‘pause’ and move on.
I cheated on my diet
You can’t CHEAT with food! It’s impossible. You can cheat on your taxes or perhaps on your partner, but you can’t cheat on your diet. The word cheat refers to something illegal or immoral, and food is neither of these.
Stop using the word cheat when you refer to any aspect of your eating plan. Instead, use the words choose or choice to describe your behaviors. If you eat a cookie that wasn’t on your diet, say, I chose to eat a cookie today. You made a choice to eat that
cookie, even if you wish you hadn’t. Tomorrow, choose to NOT eat one.
Good and Bad
Another change is to stop referring to yourself as GOOD or BAD, based on what you ate. Food is not a moral issue, so you can’t apply behavioral codes to what you do with it. You aren’t good when you eat an apple, then bad because you chase it with a few
cookies. And whether or not you stay on your diet has nothing to do with you being a good person.
Never describe yourself based on how or what you eat. Just like with the word cheat, instead of calling yourself good or bad, refer to your food choices. Some days you make better choices, sometimes poorer ones. By referring to your actions as a choice, you eliminate the punishing self-message that says you were bad.
‘I can’t resist mom’s apple pie and I can’t stay on a diet over the weekend.’ Every time you tell yourself you CAN’T do something, you reinforce the belief that you are incapable of making progress.
It also takes the blame off your shoulders because, after all, you ‘can’t!’ And when it feels too hard to stay on your diet plan, saying ‘I can’t’ gives you a valid excuse to give up and eat whatever you want.
Try this experiment. Instead of saying ‘I can’t,’ substitute the words ‘I don’t want to.’ Now you confess, ‘I don’t want to stay on a diet.’ Or you admit ‘I don’t want to visit my family without
overeating.’ And your exercise problem translates into ‘I don’t want to exercise regularly. Stating it this way certainly gives you a different view of your actions.
I’ll find a way!
To get rid of these negative messages, switch the words ‘I can’t’ into ‘I’ll find a way!’ Try saying, ‘I’ll find a way to resist mom’s pie or to stay on my diet over the weekend.’
Notice the difference in how you feel when you use that phrase. When you announce ‘I’ll find a way,’ you put yourself in charge and you strengthen your resolve to make it happen. And instead of believing you’re stuck, you more willing to create new options.
© Linda Spangle, 2010. #0607, Weight Loss for Life, Inc.
5023 W. 120th Ave. #183, Broomfield, CO 80020