Let me first start off saying that what has spurred me into thinking about weight loss surgery as even a POSSIBILITY for me is that I have a GYN appointment tomorrow to discuss fertility issues.
In the past I have had fleeting thoughts of weight loss surgery but then quickly tossed them because I have felt that (for myself) if I can't do it without surgery than I don't think that I can keep the weight off once I lose it and I will be back in the same position a couple of years after surgery as I was before.
I am now 35 and thinking about starting a family with my partner. Because of our situation (obviously can't just try to get pregnant by stopping birth control) this requires some extra thought. I made the appointment 2 or 3 months ago and then about a week ago started seriously thinking about what will happen at the appointment. I also heard on TV somewhere about a week ago that women should wait approximately 18 months after weight loss surgery (don't know if this is all weight loss surgeries, or a specific one) to get pregnant. That got me thinking that perhaps I need to start considering weight loss surgery.
I do want to start a family. I know that it would be horribly unhealthy for both my child and I to get pregnant at the weight that I'm at right now. But I also know that time is ticking quickly away and I'm approaching 40. I know that women have children after 40, but in my head it's kind of a deadline.
I guess in short what I'm saying is that I kind of think now that it's more of a possibility than I ever considered. I feel like some people are pushed too hard into it and I work in the medical field and know that all or nearly all doctors are going to recommend weight loss surgery for those who are obese and especially those who are morbidly obese.
Side effects concern me. The possibility of gaining the weight back concerns me. Doing nothing and staying the same weight concerns me. Having a stomach the size of a shot glass concerns me.
I eat because of emotional issues. I know this. I overeat well past the point of being full. Food is comfort to me and it is something that I look forward to. I have ALWAYS felt this. I can remember being 4 or 5 years old and feeling this way. How can this possibly change with a physical surgery to reduce the size of my stomach? The only way I can see is that it will force me to confront and change my behavior and attitude about food. If this is the case then why in the world can't I do the emotional work WITHOUT having surgery... and more importantly HOW can I do this without having the surgery.
I don't want my child to grow up with the same issues about food that I have if I can help it at all. I have read that those people who have weight loss surgery before getting pregnant have babies in the normal weight range who are more likely not to have weight issues as they age. Am I dooming my child to an obese life if I get pregnant while I am obese?
The longer that I try to lose the weight on my own costs me time that I could be having and recovering from weight loss surgery and getting pregnant. If I'm going to have it I need to start the process very soon to be able to think about getting pregnant after and still come in under the 40 year old mark.
The thing is that I know that physically I can do this without the surgery. One year ago (May '09 - Oct '09) I lost 54 lbs. Then I stalled. While I haven't gained any of that weight back I haven't lost any more either. It's no secret. I don't even feel like I can call it a plateau either because I KNOW why I haven't been losing the weight. The amount of exercise that I was doing plummeted and the amount of calories that I was consuming skyrocketed. That equals bad weight loss math. I lost very steadily and consistently for those first few months. My body cooperates very well when I am doing the things that I know that I should.
The last few months I just have not been able to get that level of motivation that I had at first again. I just don't know if I can get back to that place mentally again. I just don't know how to recapture that again.
I will be doing some research on weight loss surgery tonight. When I go in for my apt I will ask my Dr all of my questions and perhaps this will help to clear things up for me. I certainly hope that I don't walk out of there LESS clear on what decision to make. I will ask about risks of obesity during pregnancy for both the baby and for myself. Most importantly I will be asking about my ticking biological clock vs. my weight loss clock.
Thanks for listening everyone and I really welcome all of your input!!
WOW!! I sure didn't know that there were so many baby and pregnancy related emoticons!