Sunday, December 31, 2006
I can be the biggest stumbling block in my journey. I tend to be very rigid. I have a hard time giving my self praise. I write in my journal eveyday and have to make a point of adding something good. I tell others to lighten up be kinder to them self but I find it hard to do for myself. Having Garys Mother here now has made it difficult. She is so negitive and no matter what side of any issue your on she tkaes the otherside. She will even change sides from day to day. She is never happy no matter what. Nothing is ever right, strange part she doesn't see it. She is always so critical of Gary no matter how much she does for him. Boy does that bother me. She is also ver jealous of any attention he gives me. I have to keep my focus on my goals and remind myself sometime hourly that she is just that way and its not personal, its not anything I have done she is just a bitter old women who has had a negitive life. I sure hope I can do this. I do find myself eating or running to fridge more since she has been here. She also buys all knids of junk food that we don't keep in the house, but at least its down in her kitchen.
She kept bugging me about having fudge she made for christmas,I told her several times no thanks but she wasn't going to leave it alone. She can to my office and stuck a piece of fudge right in my face and said here try this you know you want too. You know you love chocolate. In a very firm voice I said Betty I told you before I DON"T want your fudge. Again she said one piece won't hurt you. I agreed that it would not hurt me BUT I still did not want any. In some ways her behavior helped me not want the darn fudge. I tend to be stubborn and will not let others tell me what I can and can not eat.
Well I have a new plan for 2007, I'm going to stick with it and not let anything or anyone get in my way.