Ha, I don't really want candy. I actually had to buy some for work, though. We're doing a booth show, and you have to attract people. So it's all about the chocolate. Small sigh. I do wish people would go ga-ga over fruit. Or that fruit would be cheaper and easier to keep (we're still trying to figure out if the booth will be outside. If it is -- in the Providence heat -- we will have chocolate soup after a while). Or that we didn't have to do this at all, that we'd just be loved for our robots.
But, alas, we are new and so you need to be a tad gimmicky. Plus, heh, I may be the only middle-aged Booth Babe out there. ;)
But -- this entry is not intended to really be about work, and it's not intended to be me railing against people preferring Snickers bars to blackberries.
Nuh-uh, gentle reader.
It is -- ha!
Welcome to another milestone, baby.
I am 169 pounds. This means I get to choose a new mini-goal. I've been selecting them in 10-lb. increments and this one will not be an exception. Hence my next mini-goal (on the way to the 146 Holy Grail) is to be 160.
Now, it took me 259 days to get here, but still!
It doesn't matter. I still got this far.
Now, about my measurements. I am recording them but I have not been broadcasting them, as they are fluctuating around pretty much the same numbers, and have been for months, so it doesn't exactly make for a too terribly thrilling news flash. This is fine, it is essentially normal and is also a part of me working out less. This makes the firming up part of the process happen considerably slower, and even reverse itself a bit. I am not too concerned about such things. I am a pretty solid size 12. I would like to be smaller, yes, but I am in far less of a hot hurry about such things these days.
I am still fiddling with what should feel like maintenance. What is it like to do this on a regular basis? What am I going to look like at 50? What will my days look like? That is where this portion of the experiment is going. I am learning and enuring myself to how the regular days are going to be, the days of pay the mortgage, commute to work, shovel the walk, call the plumber. Those kinds of days, but they will also be intersprinkled (that is a word NOW!) with weight training and food tracking and hey, let me grab these resistance bands, and let me see when I can get to the gym and oh, by the way, we need postage stamps and I will walk for the errand and not drive.
And, perhaps, those will be intersprinkled (there's that neologism again :)) with a few bites of candy, too. Because that is a part of maintenance. It is releasing the idea of verboten foods and exchanging them for ideas of controlled foods instead. A less binary mindset. It is not on/off, yes/no for food unless you are allergic or keep kosher or vegan or the like.
It is ... do I want a small candy bar or a big piece of fruit? Do I want pizza or a big salad with grilled chicken? All of this fits in, so long as you balance it. And, like on a see-saw, when you grab something heavier, it takes more effort, more juggling, more working out and more restriction of other things in order to balance it out.
But it is not impossible.
The booth show is on the 28th. I am certain that I will not eat any of the candy, but I cannot promise that the dinner we will have afterwards will be perfectly wholesome. And so goes the way of the world. But ... that is not the end of the world, it is not the end of health and it is not about the end of me caring about what happens to me.
Candy and pizza just do not have that power over me any more.