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I dread the holidays-and it's not due to food

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Holidays are awful for me. I know that many people struggle with this too. I used to love the holidays. From Halloween onward, I was in my element. I decorated like mad, cooked and baked and shared my goodies, had parties, went to parties, thoughtfully shopped for everyone (and on a budget but that was part of my fun, finding thoughtful gifts that didn't cost much) and enjoyed it all. I didn't even really struggle with a weight gain during the holidays. I was too busy running around and burning off calories. Then things changed. Family rifts, divorce, moves...

It's too much to write but those of you who have experienced a loss, whether it be loss of a marriage, a family member, a job, a home, a rift in the family, a move across country away from family or something else that changes everything, you probably understand. Of course, I am sure that there are some who have experienced a loss and still manage to have the same upbeat holidays you always had. I would love for you to share how you do it. Or maybe some of you never had them so you don't miss anything. For those of us who feel the loss so much more at this time of year, it is hard. I keep saying I want to just go to some tropical island from now until January but you can't run from your pain really. It just goes with you.

So I am trying to manage. In fact, I do just that. I manage to get through. I get a meal on the table. I give thanks for what blessings I have. I smile. I decorate for Christmas (not nearly like I used to, it's just not the same fun) I shop for special gifts and find some joy in the giving by buying for those less fortunate. It is just such a relief when it's all over.

I can't wait for the day when the new situation becomes the new normal. I suppose I need to be more proactive and make it so. It really does all come down to a mindset doesn't it?

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CATLOVER110
    I'm sorry the holidays are such a hard time for you. I hope everything went okay on Thanksgiving today. I know it's hard dealing with things, especially when the holiday season seems to go on for such a long time. It sounds like you're doing your best to deal with it, and your best is all you can do, right? Take care of yourself! I'll be thinking about you, and sending you good thoughts. emoticon
    3421 days ago
  • DREMARGRL
    ABSOLUTELY.....ATTITUDE IS GRATITUDE....I pray that you will find peace and can find the strength to dig down deep and fight for the joy you've lost. It's there, sweetie, just waiting for you. Have a JOYFUL thanksgiving.
    It 's okay that you don't go all out with the decorating, etc., it's what you are feeling that's important. So instead of stressing over all the other stuff, just concentrate on making yourself and others happy around you.
    Blessings.....From my heart,
    MaryAnn emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3426 days ago
  • ETWBOK
    I have some young adult niece drama too! Thank you for the well wishes and same to you!
    3426 days ago
  • KALYNKK
    This sounds so much like me. I'm already struggling with them. I also hate the drama of some of my young adult nieces. Would love for the fun to come back, but until then I guess all we can do is just get by. Hope it works out well for you!
    3426 days ago
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