Binge Free Week, and Plant Babies!
Thursday, April 28, 2011
This week has been going really well as far as eating is concerned. I just haven't been as hungry as I had in the past month. But then again, I don't know that I was ever as hungry as I thought I was. I just ate because I could, I had extra calories, so why not fill them? If I didn't have anything healthy to fill them with, why not fill them with junk? And then I started "needing" the junk again. What a horrible cycle. Then I would feel like crap, and need more junk. I felt so gross after eating processed foods.
The people that I have talked to about clean eating have had really mixed opinions. Some just stare at me confused, people at work are used to seeing me eat super healthy so it's no change to them, Bruce is supportive and glad I am not tracking becaue I was driving myself and him crazy with it. He understands my desire to remove sugar and alcohol from my diet temporarily because of the way it makes me feel when I over-consume. I hope to get to the point, over time, that I am better at reducing my consumption. I feel strongly that I will. Earlier this month I was doing really well, I just slipped up and let it spiral. I can't remove certain foods or alcohol from my diet forever, or I will never be able to learn to come back from those bumps in the road. It's always about improving, never about perfection-then again, that is easier for me to write than to live.
Mom wants to have our "big girl" vacation Memorial Day weekend. That is where us older daughters hang out with mom for the weekend, camping, drinking beers, etc. I don't know how well it will work NOT drinking around my sisters and mother. And at the same time, I don't know that I should force myself to not drink either. The only other day in May that I am allowing myself alcohol is my Anniversary celebration at the winery. And plus, my sisters aren't binge drinkers, so it shouldn't be a problem to have a couple beers or ciders. It will be more difficult to eat clean while I am camping. Last year I brought turkey burgers for dinner, along with turkey sausage to go with breakfast. Whole wheat rolls, lots of veggies, and healthy snacks. What else can you do?
Last night class was setup as a writing lab, for us to work on various assignments. After I finished the one I was working on, I got bored. And then I started to think that perhaps I was hungry. Here is my issue-I have a hard time telling if I am NOT hungry. I can always tell if I am super hungry, but I have a hard time telling if my mind is playing tricks on me. I had eaten a well rounded day's worth of food already, while I don't know how many calories (sooo freeing). I did do plyometrics yesterday, which tends to spike my appetite at times. Leaving class, I drank an entire bottle of water and waited to see what happened. Once I got home, I read for a while and didn't feel "hungry" at all. Once I sat and started watching TV with my honey, I felt a faint longing for food. It really is based around how stimulated my mind is. I really like mindless eating. I didn't cave, and I didn't force myself to go to sleep and dream about food. I drank water, and I pushed it from my mind.
First late night eating craving of the week defeated. Yay. :) Work the rest of this week is going to be easy, so I just have to keep myself busy enough to not want to eat a lot. Bruce is gone all weekend, which I will be spending finishing my final project for my Business Comm class, I get to present next week. I plan on working out every day this weekend with my normal workouts (circuits, sprints, spin, etc) but Sunday I don't usually workout so I will have to find something to do. I also want to give myself a break midday on Saturday and go outside and read or explore depending on the weather. I need some relaxing alone time instead of just structured school time. I am learning to love being alone, I used to dread Bruce going to drill for the weekend and now I love having so much time with ME. I'm not even making any night time plans this weekend, just staying in.
Might work on some crafts, I have really been slacking lately. I just get so caught up in everything else. I know I shouldn't live in the future, but it is so easy for me to say I will spend more time sewing/crafting once I leave my job and only have school instead of both. I will have a lot of free time over the summer since my classes will be part time until August. Plenty of time to sew. :) But I could be finding time now. We'll see.
I guess that's it. My plant babies are doing alright. I haven't named them yet, just in case. But I will take some pictures so you lovely folks can check 'em out. I noticed one of the pepper plants is killing the other pepper plant, since they are in the same pot. The gardening guy I talked to at the Garden Center told me that it would probably happen with those plants that dominate space. But I will still have a good crop from the survivors, haha. My tomato plant is flowering and has two little tomatoes already growing! It only had 1 when I got it, so I call that improvement. My zucchini plants are growing like weeds, and I am pretty sure that it will come to blows soon enough and there will only be one or two survivors.