Working on my Health

Monday, May 02, 2011

Today is exactly 30 days until I no longer work in my job which makes me smile. I want to start me new life on a positive note. No goal as far as weight is concerned, just overall health goals really. May is going to be an awesome month because I have a lot going on to look forward to. This weekend is my (4 year!!) Anniversary celebration on Sunday with my lover, we are going to stay in a nice little B&B and go on a wine trail. My sugar free self will be absent that day, obviously. I also will allow myself to drink liberally, as long as I stay in control of my actions (it has been a while since I've lost that). I didn't weigh myself today to set a goal for the end of May, I really am wanting to stay away from the numbers game for a while. I will admit that I checked my weight a couple times last week, nervousness over not tracking any of my food. I did great, though. I knew I could handle it, I just have to trust myself to do it longterm as well.

-10 minutes of exercise every day, per Bikini Challenge

-5 longer workouts per week (this has become my lifestyle, but I want to remind myself not to slack off when I get tired or stressed)

-Limit alcohol consumption to 2 drinks at a time (in a day, not double fisting, haha) BESIDES: Anniversary celebration (May 8th), and camping at Cooper's Landing on the 28th of May. That will make a total of twice, which is not too shabby (for me).

-Continue to eat clean all month long, it makes me feel better than eating any other way could. I don't see any issues other than I am supposed to go to a military course the week of the 23rd. It is hard to eat clean while away to training, but I believe I will have a refridgerator and if so I will be going to the grocery store and stocking up on my own stuff

-Eat 80% of my meals vegetarian. That means only 4 meat including meals per week. This should be pretty easy considering I make my meals ahead of time, except dinner a couple nights a week. I will try to eat primarily seafood when I do eat meat. If I eat beef, pork, or chicken I want to buy local as much as I can. I have been looking a lot into meat production, and it really bothers me.

-Don't track calories all month. This has been so freeing the past week. Not freeing in the sense of "oh man I can eat whatever I want" but I am starting to work through my obsession with the numbers which is lovely. I haven't binged once since I stopped counting calories, and I know that I ate really well last week. It helps planning all of my meals ahead of time. I have been sticking to portion control, and working through journaling to try to conquer my eating issues head on. I will be weighing myself weekly to make sure that I don't gain weight, it will help me to adjust either the amount I take in or the amount I put out if I start to slide. I am confident that I can handle this.

It is weird to think that at the beginning of last month I was lowering my goal weight because I was half a pound away from my original goal. Now I don't know what I want. I probably weigh a pound or so more than that, from the two weeks of binge fest I had after that. I think the only number I am going to work on changing right now, is the amount of weight I can lift. Bikini season is coming, and I have always thought that meant that I needed to be a certain weight. But I think that at this point in my health journey, focusing on training myself to be more efficient will give me the best results. I want muscle to show off, and I am getting there. I would love a flat stomach, but I am not going to get it by obsessing over it. I've shown myself that more and more over time. I am going to get it by working hard, and eating what is good for me. And eating when I am hungry. And looking at myself in a loving light.

I am starting to really look at goals in the long term, I am thankful for the journaling exercise last week that got my gears turning. I am not focusing on the upcoming music festivals and walking around in cotton skirts and swim suits. I am focusing on my future, my career in the health field, being a good role model for the people I work with. For my nieces and nephews and children if I have them. I want to feel good about myself, not because my weight is that *perfect* number, but because I love to workout hard, and eat good food, I go explore the outdoors and craft in my freetime instead of watching TV, I grow my own food when I can, and I have a relatively low impact on the environment around me. That's a me I can respect, that is the person I am becoming little by little each week. Sure, I will still drink wine and get a little crazy every once in a while, I will still cry for no reason and freak Bruce out sometimes, I will still eat fried chicken after drinking a few beers. But most of the time, I won't. And that feeling of moderation is what keeps me grounded, and makes me excited to keep pushing myself every day.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • DEE0973
    Awesome blog....great for you!!
    3458 days ago
  • EMMA2727272
    I love reading this blog!! I've been thinking a lot about counting calories lately and it's effect on what I eat... For the past two days I've been eating 'intuitevly' but still been thinking about what I'm choosing to eat, and I've had the best results. While tracking, I find that I try to squeeze in extra snacks and junk food because I know I can 'afford it'. At the end of the day, after I've eaten what I will for the day, I put it into the nutrition tracker to see how I did and so far I've been doing great, and the urge to binge has diminished 85%.

    Good for you for reassesing what's important to you and how you're going to get to where you want to be! You are an excellent role model to us on sparks as well as to any children who are or may be in your life!
    3458 days ago
    Whoohoo for bikini challenge! :)

    3458 days ago
    I really like what you had to say about being a role model not because your weight is a magic number but because of all these other really great things you do. I really admire that :)
    3459 days ago
    You've got a great attitude, keep up the good work! Have an amazing time on your trip.
    3459 days ago
    LET'S GO!!! May is going to be an awesome month for us both! Woohoo!
    3459 days ago
    Woohoo, one month!
    3460 days ago
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