I'm the kind of person who tends to ruminate, going over and over things, especially negative things, in my own mind. I have learned lots of ways to break out of that box and live in the Here and Now, and let go of the negativity.
My best tool is humor. I'm not a necessarily funny person, but I love to hear or read jokes, watch AFV and similar videos, and I love to joke around and help people smile when I can. And I've found that smiles are contagious, and wittiness rather than sarcasm can be relaxing when I'm tense.
I also love to watch animals play, or pick up my cats or ruffle my dogs' heads. They seem to like it too, which makes it all even better.
Sometimes I need a friend or relative to help me snap out of the negativity for a minute, and I've learned to take that minute and make it grow to encompass my whole day.
Once I was complaining about 'having' to feed our pets. My DH heard me say, "When I get to heaven, I will never have to feed another pet." She looked at me, a bit shocked I guess, and replied, "When you get to heaven, you'll be able to feed our pets all the time!" She shocked me, into realizing that by merely enjoying the great parts of taking care of our pets, I could have a little time in heaven on earth, every day! Since that day, I've really enjoyed feeding our pets, and being very comforted by the fact that I can, for a minute, make them very happy and fill their tummies.
I got a diagnosis yesterday, and I've been hoping for a long time that my suspicions were wrong. They weren't, and some parts of the diagnosis are scary, like that the NIH is conducting a study on how sjogren's affects the autonomic nervous system, and that the doc says that yes it does cause neuropathy. I already have numbness in my hands and feet, tho it isn't 24/7, and I'm just past 50 yrs old. But I'm not affected by the numbness while awake as much as while I'm sleeping, and I probably have quite a while, perhaps years or even decades, before it interferes with my daily living.
I went to my BFF's house today, in the evening, and helped him with some of his own chores so he could have a break. I really enjoyed being there; his house is quiet and when the sun went down the peepers and other night insects, and some birds even, began a pleasant cacophony that was soothing. I enjoyed just sitting and listening to them, and it helped me to relax even more. The sounds of home, of course, are also nice, but it made a nice change to sit quietly and just use my ears. I didn't think of it at the time, but the effect was almost like listening to a favorite opera aria.
Now that I'm back home, I can recall the sound of that moment and replay it in my mind, even when negative ruminations threaten to become intrusive in my thoughts. When I do, I can relax enough here at home to take the time to look around, seeing one of our cats lying in a small child's size couch we have on top of the tv cabinet in our home. I can stretch and move to stretch, and anticipate the great feeling of resting with my DH and several furbabies (yep, I've picked up SparkSpeak, lol) for the night. I can look forward to another day tomorrow of happiness and wonder and joy at being alive.
I do have a list of To Dos for tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that; but with the tools I have, and the support and caring of friends and family, I'll be able to handle them, even if it isn't with ease.
I don't have to be perfect. I can just do my best, and deal with life on life's terms, a day or an hour or a minute at a time, and I can live without the negativity.
, Lizzy =D !