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Some Maxines For Your Monday

Monday, November 14, 2011

Any woman can have the body of a 21 year old as long as she buys him drinks first.

It's scary when you start to make the same noises as your coffeemaker.

Men are always whining about how we're suffocating them. Personally, I think if you can hear them whining you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow!!!

I keep hitting "Escape", but I'm still here.

Ever get the feeling your stuff strutted off without you?

Ever notice how people who tell you to calm down.....are the ones who got you mad in the first place.........

I'm going South for the Winter. Actually, parts of me are heading there already.

I could go on a hayride or I could shove sharp sticks down my pants.......same difference.

Oh, this is great sleeping weather, but at my age, what isn't?

I use a leaf blower on my's called the wind.

I just noticed frost on my pumpkins.....Guess it's time to start wearing a bra again.

Fall is a tough season for weather forecasters.....It's too cool to scare us with the heat index and too warm to scare us with the wind chill.
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