150,000-199,999 SparkPoints 166,139

How My Addiction Nearly Ended My Addiction...

Saturday, May 05, 2012

This blog is way overdue! It is a hard (and long) one to write because I have to admit my weaknesses and admit that my doctors and friends were right and I was wrong.

No, I was not addicted to drugs or liquor...I was a workoutaholic!

I took this picture literally! Yes... my addiction was to working out everyday...sometimes twice a day....sometimes 7 days a week (no rest day). I am one of those persons who felt guilty missing a workout; one of those persons who worked out for at least 60 minutes a day....30 minutes? Ha! I laugh at that! Now, I know a lot of persons on SP may be wondering so what? A lot of persons record more than 3000 minutes a month. But I am not a typical person. I have a serious back problem...I have disc degenerative disease, two torn discs, bulging disc against thecal sac and several dessicated disc cartilages. Last year, I found out how serious my condition was and since then; I have been warned that I cannot continue to work out as I used to do in 2010. I had several 'relapses' where I writhed in pain and missed several days of work because the pain was so bad. I vowed each time, I would not work out so hard again or I would take it easy the next time.

In February 2012, I started to do Insanity. Obviously, I was insane! There is a clear warning that if you have back or knee issues, don't do the workouts. In addition, I knew my two orthopedic surgeons, my general practitioner, my physiotherapist, family and friends would balk at this idea yet I started anyways. My friends in my fitness group on FB warned me everyday - please be careful and I always responded "no pain, Insanity agrees with my back!"

In March, I added Body Revolution. I started to have muscle spasms...ignored that...felt a little warning pain...ignored that. On March 17, 2012, I woke up with some pain but did Bob Harper's Ultimate Cardio Body workout because I wanted to try out my new sneakers and HRM. I used my tens unit in the night and felt fine when I woke up on Sunday morning. When I arrived at church, I could barely come out of my car. The pain just came on; no warning! To cut a long story short, I ended up in the hospital...I could not walk for two days!! The pain was so excruciating! The injections did not work...the tablets did not work...ice and heat did not work! It was never this bad. I couldn't go to the bathroom on my own, I couldn't sit up to eat, I couldn't drive myself. Wow! What a wake up call. It was a humbling week. Several life lessons. Thanks to my doctors, DBF (who took such good care of me
emoticon), friends, physiotherapist and a new addition, my chiropractor, I am now on the mend. It didn't seem possible in March but now I am walking just fine and I am having painfree days! I have gotten the go-ahead to exercise this past week but this time, I WILL NOT be going back to my obsessive behavior!

So I have learnt that I need to more than ever:

I have also learnt that I don't need a 60 minute workout!

I have to:

I can't be so hard on myself! I have done well and this setback doesn't mean I am a failure! I won't just put on 40lbs because I can't workout or I can't do 6 days a week or can't workout like 60 minutes a day. It is hard lesson but I prefer to get addicted to taking care of myself the best way more than being addicted to exercise that unfortunately, can put an end to me not being able to move much less exercise.

In addition,

So lesson learnt but I won't give up! I will succeed just no crazy stuff!! Thanks to all my Spark friends that checked in and left a kind note or sparkgoodie! I appreciated it!

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    BTW, Your not crazy..please dont call yourself that. Your awesome and you had passion in your working out now you have to modify it. Journeys are all about the modifications.
    2857 days ago
    emoticon emoticon
    2870 days ago
    Wow! Thank you for your courage in sharing.
    2890 days ago
    Oh my goodness, I have always been the same way with exercise. Working out 1.5-2 hours a day. Always choosing the "hardest" workout I could find. THEN.... I hurt my hip. Tore the labrum (which attaches the femur to the pelvis). I couldn't workout for at least 6 weeks, and then when I did I had to start slowly with yoga, pilates, and other workouts that I would have felt were "too easy." I still get pain every now and then, and when I do I know that I need to back off a little and be easier on myself then next day. Hope your back feels better soon!
    2940 days ago
    I hope you are still on the mend now! Diet is up to 80% of weight loss/maintenance and so you are right, you don't need to workout a ton!
    2948 days ago
    I'm glad you're working on taking care of ALL of you!
    2955 days ago
    I am glad you shared your story,
    I was over active before my back injury.
    The hardest thing is missing activities when you can not do them.
    Hats off for cutting back and working in your range and being happy with it.
    2963 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1506126
    So I was right! You were crazy! emoticon I am so happy that you are on the mend and feeling better. Please do take care of your body, you do only have one that is your temple, which is only temporary.

    My prayers are with you doll.
    Have a great week.
    2965 days ago
    I can completely relate to this issue. I just had heart surgery, and before that I was pushing myself constantly to exercise despite the fact that my heart was under a large amount of constant pressure. It was not until the last few weeks that I began to realize how bad my heart was, I was born with this condition that is very rare, and the doctor said that I was functioning with only 30 percent of my aortic valve working my whole life. Now I'm recovering, healing slowly though I feel pretty good. I miss working out, but I know that I will soon be able too...I am trying not to feel guilty for not being able after the surgery.
    2966 days ago
    Thanks for sharing your lesson. Insanity almost did me in too. I ignored the warnings as well, when I knew better. I just wanted results. emoticon I'm still addicted to working out, but luckily I've found things that are FUN and not painful to throw into the mix with the tough stuff, like Jillian workouts. I'm glad you're doing better. Keep taking care of yourself. You're amazing and wonderful inspiration.
    2990 days ago
    wowie that's an inspiring blog!!
    3000 days ago
    Be sure to take it slow and carefully...injuries are no joke for sure!! Definitely take at least 1 rest day...maybe 2 per week and limiting your workout time will help too =) Remember that weight loss is 70-80% diet so you can make incredible progress just havinga good balanced diet =)
    3000 days ago
  • STELA731
    I'm glad you're better. Thanks for sharing ;)
    3008 days ago
  • MSSTM1
    I'm glad you're doing better! emoticon
    3010 days ago
    Nice to meet you here. Channel that drive and dedication to living healthy. Sorry to here of your struggles. I hope that you can learn from this experience. Go really deep into this issue no matter how painful. Now that I am approaching 50 I feel the difference in my body and with so much mixed media about fitness I struggle to out perform myself sometimes just to prove to myself that I can do this which sounds like a good thing but I sometimes ignore warning signals from my body, especially my knees. I am trying to master food addiction. I believe there is no cure for addiction but management. Some days I manage wonderfully and others not so wonderfully. Dig deep. Pray. And live life consciously. We only have one body and one life.
    Best wishes! emoticon
    3011 days ago
    Good thing you found that out without serious, debilitating injury! I do work out 6 days a week. I used to do 7 but started getting burned out so now I do 6. And if I feel sore or tired I just do a long walk instead of an intense workout. And I don't do any running due to knee issues. My jumping is modified and so are my pushups. I did 2 rounds of P90X but my pushups were always on my knees, I stopped when I needed to, and have bands instead of a pull up bar. Glad you're feeling better!
    3011 days ago
  • TIFFY0906
    Great blog - its hard to recognize and/or voice our weaknesses but by doing it we are able to correct it and move on. But I'm so glad you are doing better.

    It's interesting you would post this today because I just recognized that I will continue to push myself but not always listen to my body. I recognized that it is okay to push myself some days but I need to lighten up some days and make sure I take at least 1 rest day. Going to buy myself a nice relaxing stretch and/or yoga DVD.

    Take good care of yourself.
    3011 days ago
    What a great reminder! Rest days are just as important to the body as the workouts!
    3012 days ago
    Very well said! Good for you to come to that realization, Sometimes we just can't see what others see. Here's to your progress and success!

    3012 days ago
    Workoutaholic...you....Totally!!>I'm glad you have finally decided to really take care of yourself...it's important.
    3012 days ago
  • KKC-318
    Great blog! It feels so good to have a breakthrough! I was really crazy about cardio for a little while and worried if I missed a day I wouldn't go back to doing it at all. Then I started Jamie Eason's 12-Week LiveFit Trainer and she has no cardio for the first month only ST. It has been hard but I find I really enjoy strength training and I hate these three days off in the first two weeks. Feel like I should be doing something! But I have trust, I mean, she is Jamie Eason, right? She didn't get that body for nothing!

    Glad you're better! Hope your progress continues!
    3012 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.