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Computer Skills

Saturday, September 08, 2012

This ought to make you feel better about your computer skills!!!

Tech Support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one.....
Tech Support: Click on the "My Computer" icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?

Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says "Can't find printer." I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it.....

Tech Support: What's on your monitor now, Ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech Support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in.

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech Support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five dots.

Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech Support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry.....Internet Explorer.....

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

Tech Support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first email.
Tech Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter "a" in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?

This one and the next are my personal favorites!!!

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech Support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. the man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."

And last but not least!!!

Tech Support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech Support: "P".......on your keyboard, Bob.
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