Saturday, April 14, 2007
It is only my second day and I already feel overwhelmed. This is why I never stick with much. I get overwhelmed or intimidated and give up. I have only been a part of spark for 2 days but I have been working out and eating healthy for almost two weeks. I dont see much of a change. Maybe I will never be in my healthy weight range. I will be just like the rest of my family FAT...
I had two partners to workout with and both have canceled. I forced myself to do it alone yesterday but today i already feel lonely so I dont even want to start alone. I need someone I can count on to help me through this.
I cant give up, I am to miserable like this. I am no good to my kids or myself or anyone when I feel this way. I wish there was a workout group or walking group in my area that didnt cost money. Imagine that everything costs money. lol
Just a bad day I guess I can get through it I hope, I dont want to quit, I want to succeed. They say the first few weeks are the hardest and boy are they right. I had to bake my fiance a butter receipe cake with chocolate icing and it took everything not to eat it. I knew once i had one piece I would want more and more so I didnt eat any and it was hard. he just kept saying oh eat some go ahead he just doesnt understand, most men dont.
oh well I will make it I have my spark friends right..