Wednesday, August 14, 2013
I’ve been trying to remember back to the time three years ago when I was truly ready to start losing weight. What made it finally click after decades of being 100 lbs overweight? Something in my mind said “You’re ready, Erin.” And I was.
In a year, I lost 110 lbs and reached my weight goal. I hadn’t been 140 lbs since I was 18 years old. My body felt foreign and I couldn’t stop looking at my reflection as I passed by store windows. It was as though I had to keep checking to make sure I wasn’t imagining the fact that I was now thin.
For over a year I did a pretty good job at keeping the weight off and I relished in the fact that I no longer needed to shop in a special section for clothing. I was able to stop obsessing about how embarrassed and uncomfortable I was because of my weight. I was finally happy with my body.
Well, life took a turn and I allowed depression to get the best of me. I was unemployed, my romantic relationships weren’t working out and I eventually even became homeless. It was the hardest year of my life and the weight managed to creep back on.
I’m now 205 lbs and know that something has to give. I can’t let this be how my weight loss journey ends. I know what I’m capable of. I know what works for me.
For months I have had all sorts of false starts. My life is still in limbo and I can no longer use that as an excuse.
Like I’ve said before… It doesn’t have to start on a Monday. It doesn’t need to be the first of the year or month. I don’t have to gorge myself before starting. I just need to start.
It’s 4:30 pm on Wednesday August 14th. I’m ready.