leaving the past in the past. forgiving myself?
Thursday, September 03, 2015
i have to say I'm pretty proud of myself today. I am currently on day 3 of sugar free September. wow! it feels awesome! I can say that today cause yesterday was just one headache that controlled my every action. I don't want to give too many details, but let me just say I consumed whatever I could get my hands on in an attempt to get it to go away. everything except sugar! yay, me!
so of course I woke up this morning feeling guilty. I ate too much. I drank more than my one drink a day limit. I messed up. again. but did I? before I could let the I-messed-up,-may-as-well-just-
quit, monster arrive I told myself, yes, you messed up, but you didn't eat sugar! and that's the big one. that's the focus of September. I think if I can survive yesterday I can survive the whole month!
today has been much easier physically. yesterday I was detoxing hardcore. I had a headache, I was tired, fuzzy-headed. I just wanted to sleep. I was hungry so I consumed a lot of fruit and junk, once I made sure it didn't have sugar. today I feel in control of my appetite. it's awesome!
so not only am I not feeling regret over yesterday, but I've also forgiven my out of control eating. that never happens! I beat myself up for days for one mistake. that mistake always leads to days of overeating and not caring cause I've already messed up, i'll just start again Monday. not this time! I'm starting over today!
I know the weekend won't be easy, but as long as I focus on no sugar i'll be fine. and as long as I keep being nice to myself and forgiving my mistakes, i'll be just fine.
am I learning to love myself?!