MOMTO6CUTIES
20,000-24,999 SparkPoints 21,752
SparkPoints
 

I'm going to be real! The truth!

Saturday, September 12, 2015

For the past 7 months I have struggled. I would do good a few days and fall off. I would try so hard but I wasn't trying hard enough. The harder I fought and failed the more depressed I became. I easily gained back 25 pounds of the nearly 70 I had lost.
There is the truth that I have avoided putting here for everyone to see. I was ashamed of that gain. Embarrassed. I was suppose to be an inspiration not a failure.

I even changed my weight loss ticker so people couldn't see my gain. I felt as if I put it out for all the world to see I would show my failure. I would be vulnerable and open to ridicule. :(

Something clicked in my brain at the end of August. I knew I could do it again.l I had done it once so i could be strong and do it again. I did good for a week still fighting the depression that had forced me to an all time low in my life. Stress from my marriage, my children and of course my failure had me at my breaking point.

On August 31 I began again. Renewed. I haven't been depressed and I have lost 11 of those pounds.

So there it is. My gain. My truth. I battle depression. But when I'm healthy and loosing I feel like I'm on top of it.

The truth isn't always pretty but it's my truth!
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RKOTTEK
    lets share our weightloss
    1840 days ago
  • HOPEFULHIPPO
    I've gained all but 10 pounds of what I've lost. There's no ridicule here, only understanding and "the same"

    We just all have to band together and find what works for us...and stick with it. I need to find out what has kept me unmotivated for 3 years. I think I know, but I'm not sure.....

    In any case, same as you...haven't changed ticker (only mine was because I keep telling myself I'll get back down to it...)

    ah well, let's all go change our ticker and start fresh and be fantastic.

    shall we?
    1840 days ago
  • MARCIAS22
    Thank you so much for sharing this because your story is my story and I know that so many others can relate. You have been making really awesome progress and you are successful because you never give up. We all take a detour every now and then but getting back on track and putting everything else behind us and moving forward is really the key. Progress not perfection will get us there.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1841 days ago
  • BONNIEMCC488
    Good for you for feeling ready to share it! I don't think you have anything to be embarrassed about. Yes you gained, but you have kept trying and here you are back again and losing. You're doing awesomely!
    1841 days ago
  • MARYBETH4884
    Nothing to be embarrassed about! Most of us have been there or are there! I got with 5 pounds of my ultimate goal a year ago and I've been battling back and for a few pounds up or down since! I am currently 20 pounds from my ultimate goal but have made a renewed effort in the last week or so to really get there! I never stopped tracking food or exercise but it's been a battle anyway! I know I can do it and the past year has just been an experiment in trying to maintain! You should be proud that you resisted gaining all the lost weight back! Regain of 10 a month is not unheard of at all!

    Life gets busy and stressful and focus is hard! Good luck on your renew effort, Now is the perfect time to regain your control before the holiday temptation! emoticon
    1841 days ago
  • GINNABOOTS
    You are awesome, thank you so much for sharing. A huge inspiration to all.
    1841 days ago
  • MITCHSTA1232
    Glad you're back on track. You're not alone. Exercise is key for me in keeping both my weight and my depression in check! Keep pushing! You can do it!
    1841 days ago
  • PENNYMAE85
    YOU ARE NOT THE FISRT NOR WILL BE THE LAST THAT HAS BEEN THROUGH THIS.YES MOST DON'T FACE UP TO WHAT THEY HAVE DONE IT GET OFF TRACK.ME I AM A EMOTIONAL EATER.I LET THINGS GET THE BEST OF ME AT TIMES.I AM LEARNING NOT TO DO THIS.THINK BEFORE EATING.
    1841 days ago
  • no profile photo KATYSISK
    Great job
    1841 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

More Blogs by MOMTO6CUTIES