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Some Words You Never Want to Hear.

Sunday, January 24, 2016

"You need a SECOND mammogram."
"You need to have an ultrasound."
"You need a breast biopsy."
"The biopsy is positive."
"You have BREAST CANCER."

Upon hearing the word CANCER, it's like someone described ,"a tsunami hitting you full force.". You are momentarily afloat in a sea of nothingness ,desperately wanting to reach out and grab something to save you.
Just the word CANCER, represents an alien evil destructive darkness that has no purpose other than destroy peoples lives.
CANCER forever changes a persons life regardless of the eventual outcome.

This ordeal for me started on December 18, 2015,my yearly mammogram ;
Spent the weekend celebration my 74 birthday.
I have been on a life saving ,lifestyle, fitness journey since January 2010. I turned my life, health around, losing 200 pounds.
I celebrated that weekend with how far I had come, what I had achieved an how comfortable I was in my life.
Monday, the 21st, received a message that I needed a second mammogram and plan for extra time as an ultrasound might be needed.
Called early on Tuesday, 22nd. Told I could come in at 10:00.
I couldn't see much on the mammogram. That's why technicians read the results.
The ultrasound that was done later, I could see a dark area that shouldn't be there.
A biopsy was scheduled for January 4, 2016.

I went off to Mexico to enjoy my birthday/Christmas present from a dear friend. In hindsight that was probably a mistake, my mind was not in Mexico.
I didn't tell anyone what I was going through, didn't want to be a downer for the other's on our vacation.
I had talked to my sister-in-law, Mary before I left and she was going to accompany me on the biopsy appointment.

Monday January 4, the biopsy went as planned. I thought at first I wouldn't watch, but decided
since this is my body I wanted to see exactly what was being done.
I watched as the doctor inserted a long needle and took four core samples with the assistance of a ultrasound technician. Didn't take long, it was over..
Now the uncertainty ,the waiting game began. Was told it usually takes four days to get results.

Friday, 8th, saw my Doctor.
Mary went with me.
She is a rock, ready to take notes, be the support I needed.
When my doctor said, " It is cancer."
I looked at Mary, then the Doctor, I wanted to say, "did you say it is, or isn't?"
I wanted it to be ISN'T, so desperately, please , all I could think was I'm drowning. Please God help me.

I heard the words, caught early, prognosis good.
This is what I will focus on. Positive thoughts.

The was an appointment set up with an Oncologist Surgeon Dr. Beth Dayton, who I have found out to be admired by all who know her or have had her as a doctor.
Appointment was on January 15. I found her very comfortable to talk with and reassured with her as my doctor.

This is what I know right now.
The most common type of breast cancer is, invasive ductal carcinoma, which I have. It's stage 2, size 2-3 cm. About ping pong ball size. It's deep, against the muscle.
I will undergo a Lumpectomy on January 27. They will take out a few lymph modes to test. If the cancer cells haven't spread, no further surgery will be needed.
In about a month I will start a 4 or 6 weeks of radiation therapy.
Later I will be in hormone therapy for five years.

I had doubts about posting this blog, being so open about my condition.
But my Spark friends have given me friendship, support, during my six years on my Spark journey. I needed that support to achieve the success I have now. I know this ordeal I am going through now will need that support

I also want to be a reminder to all women of my age group that breast cancer increases with age.
The chance of developing breast cancer in the next 10 years is as follows.
YEARS RATE
20 1 in 1,681
30 1 in 232
40 1 in 69
50 1 in 42
60 1 in 29
70 1 in 27
Lifetime risk up to 85 ,,,,,1 in 8.

There are many factors linked to higher risk of breast cancer.
I want to list a few that relate to all of us striving to better our lifestyle. Those are lack of exercise and being overweight, or weigh gain {postmenopausal breast cancer} Drinking alcohol, often more than one drink a day.

The most important thing to remember is annual mammogram after age 50. Unless there is reason to start at an earlier age. Self examination, and don't hesitate to see your doctor if you have any reason to question what you think you might have found. Your Doctor is the best person to reassure you .

I plan on blogging about this ordeal a nd how it affect my life.
I'm going to do my best to stay up beat and keep my faith and believe my life has and continues to be in God's hands.

I will still be here for others just as you are here for me.

Peace and Love
Tisha
.



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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • TOMATOCAFEGAL
    Lung cancer, lung removed. Had to learn to breath . 2 years cancer free as of June 10. Whoooo. Stay positive
    885 days ago
  • ALABAMASUSAN17
    emoticon Wow! God Bless you!
    1066 days ago
  • BEATRIZ269
    OMG Trish. I am just reading this post (5.19.2016). You are wholly in my prayers and I am hopeful you will get through this. You are a strong woman who has overcome a lot already. I hope your positivity and the support you receive in your life helps you battle this.

    May God bless you and please know I am praying confidently you will beat this.



    1648 days ago
  • SIMPLY_JAE
    Bless your heart.. my mother had breast cancer and I remember how scary and overwhelming the whole ordeal can be.. I just found your page so I just pray you are doing okay.. there is not too many words can say to make everything be okay...you will be in my thoughts and prayers.btw..My mom came through her surgery okay and lived cancer free.. she was in her seventies then.. she lived to be 81
    1686 days ago
  • COOKWITHME65
    Tisha, So sorry for this late comment but I haven't been on for month's and thought I'd check in to see if you had made any great finds while out thrifting. A passion we both share. I was overwhelmed with emotions when I found this blog. How brave of you to post such a personal and very informative educational blog during this challenging time in your life. The people you will help along your recovery journey will be amazing. All those whom cross your path will soon learn you are a fighter and have won many battles thus far. You will be in my prayers,dear sparkfriend, and I am so glad you have Mary by your side to support you in your time of need. Take all the help that is offered, rest when you can and know you have many friends thinking of you and wishing you a speedy recovery. emoticon
    1691 days ago
  • MAGGIEROSEBOWL
    Oh Tish, I am way behind on Spark, and just saw your latest blog which is several months old already. Hope everything is going well, or as well as can be expected. Cancer changes everything, but I know regaining your health by losing weight will certainly help your prognosis and I also know with your positive attitude you will beat this, just like you beat obesity. Take care, and please keep us updated! We care!!!
    1694 days ago
  • OHMEMEME
    emoticon

    emoticon to you.

    I got a call back for second mammo and ultrasound just this week but all is well. Tears of gratefulness and compassion for you.

    Thanks for sharing. Sending encouraging positives you way.

    Appreciate the updates.

    Spark is all about searching for wellness. Keep Sparking!
    1717 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15724029
    Hi Tisha,
    I never wanted to hear those words either, and even after sharing them, having cancer can feel very lonely at times! I had a lumpectomy, radiation and meds for five years and am now eleven years cancer free! Radiation left me very fatigued a lot of the time, and being fair skinned, my skin was very sensitive to radiation. Every appt those first years post treatment, I worried, but here I am, 65, and fine!
    Take care, and I'll be checking in to see how you're doing! emoticon
    1725 days ago
  • CANNIE50
    It made my heart heavy to read this. I'm so sorry you're enduring yet another painful challenge. You are such an inspiration and beautiful example. I hope you blog again when you're feeling up to it. I'm so thinking of you, lovely Tisha☮💜
    1731 days ago
  • KSNANA2
    I had Stage 2 breast cancer at age 45 which required a mastectomy. I was not given a choice in 1993. After 22 years I had cancer in the remaining breast. I chose mastectomy this time. That was this last summer. So I do know the emotions you are going through. I am glad you have a good support system. Mine mean the world to me. Keep us posted and I will be praying for you. emoticon
    1758 days ago
  • HAPPY_AS_IS
    I am wishing you the best. Love your outlook and willingness to share your journey with others.

    I added you as a friend so I can follow your journey and pray for you.
    1758 days ago
  • JEANNESPARK
    Thanks for sharing your story. Cancer is a horrible disease, and I'm glad yours was caught early. It takes a lot of courage to share your story, and it is very much appreciated. Wishing you all the best!
    1759 days ago
  • DEE797
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    1759 days ago
  • SWEETENUFGILL
    1 in 27 is a massive number................. sharing this sort of experience on Spark People is so helpful. I heard a programme on the radio about the way that knowledge was shared between women in the past (before phones, computers - when people lived near each other etc) - about childbirth, parenting, relationships, co-counselling, health, illness, death - and how we tend to have to turn to the internet now to find our shared information. By having the generosity and courage to blog openly about this, you will be helping so many others. Thank you. Wishing you all the very best with your forthcoming treatment.
    love
    Gill x
    1759 days ago
  • CAROLJ35
    Thanks for sharing and explaining so well.
    I just turned 80 and don't understand why I am told I don't need to have mammograms any more. I often find women in this age bracket who do develop breast cancer.
    Doctors also said I don't need colonoscopies any more and that bothers me as I have diverticula from one end of colon to other.
    Sometimes you wonder.
    I am adding you to my prayer list.


    1761 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15505658
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    1761 days ago
  • HGSGUY
    You won't see your spark friends during your surgery, but know we are holding your hand as you go through this. My thoughts and prayers with you and also wish you a speedy recovery so you and Titan can enjoy our sunny (sometimes) Oregon springtime!
    1762 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15451609
    emoticon
    1762 days ago
  • no profile photo DIASTER
    Wonder how many lives you saved today? Sharing all your journeys with us has made a difference. I am another one that skipped last years mamogram, yes I do know better but because of you will be aking that appointment.
    Our prayers are with you, and know you are in good hands.
    1763 days ago
  • PIMPINELLAN50
    Tisha, I somehow missed my annual Mammography last year,and that's the first time
    that has happened..My mother,grandmother and aunt all developed breast cancer in their late seventies and eighties.Your your blog has made me book a Mammogram in February,as it' s hereditary in my family.Thank you for being so candid and sharing with us what you are going through.I am so relieved that yours was caught in an early stage.
    A mammogram may feel a bit uncomfortable to some...but i know without a doubt that these tests saves lives! emoticon
    You have an army of support here on Spark People and although we may not have meet you " in person".. we will always 'have your back' Tisha.
    Sending emoticon and emoticon your way.
    Marianne.
    1763 days ago
  • GINISJOURNEY

    emoticon Tisha, You express your feelings so well. My DH also had early stage breast cancer, 15 years ago. They decided, since he was a man, that a mastectomy was his very best chance. He was operated on, by a wonderful surgeon, and they got it all. He now sports what he refers to as his war wound, which he displays proudly. He says it is a war but the beauty is you have a real fighting chance to win. I know in my heart, you will be a war hero as well. Blessings and keep blogging.


    Gini emoticon
    1764 days ago
  • DJ4HEALTH
    emoticon
    1764 days ago
  • GODS_TEMPLE
    Tisha, Thanks for taking us into your confidence. I wish I could be there to walk through this with you, but since I can't, just know that my thoughts and prayers will be with you. Love you, Ramona
    1764 days ago
  • FROSTY99
    Thank you for sharing. I am sure this will encourage others on here to take the time to get their annual mammogram. Sending prayers your way.
    1764 days ago
  • QTEALADY20031
    Tisha, very well written. I am glad that you have your sister-in-law to be with you at these appointments and follow ups. It is always good to have someone close to you with you and in a sense two sets of ears to hear what is being said. I am sure you were shocked at the diagnosis. It is what we all fear. Tisha, you have overcome so much in your life and you will overcome this too. I am so sorry that you have to go thru what is ahead but I know you will come out of this with healing. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Love & Hugs, June
    1764 days ago
  • NUMD97
    Beautifully written, Tisha. I know you feel that you are drowning, and I am so glad that you have someone close who can take notes and ask some of the questions that did not occur to you. I am really glad that you found a doctor who gives you the comfort that you need to get to the other side of this experience with her skilled, surgical hands.

    I promise you, too, that the roar you hear in your head now, will eventually convert to a low-level hum, as you put time and distance from this event.

    You know where to find me, if you should feel the need.

    All the best to you especially this week,

    Nu
    1764 days ago
  • RESTORETOSANITY
    Thank you very much for including us. I hope you get back all the good you have given, and more.
    1764 days ago
  • SPEDED2
    Thank you for sharing. It's brave to share such a story that is so very personal. We are all here to give you any and all support that's possible. Your blog may just be a life saver for someone who needed a gently nudge to get their annual mammo.

    Prayers for comfort and a speedy recovery!

    emoticon ~ Jeanne
    1764 days ago
  • KRISZTA11
    emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • MORTICIAADDAMS
    You will be in my prayers, GF. I know you will remain strong.
    1765 days ago
  • NVRGIVINGUP
    Tish you are a true inspiration to all. You have helped, encouraged and believed in so many on their journeys. You are in my prayers and thoughts!
    ~Teresa
    1765 days ago
  • WITCHYWOMAN75
    Tisha, I was told I had breast cancer in November. I had a lumpectomy in December and started my radiation in January. Bam Bam Bam I started SP a year ago and lost 100 lbs. I couldn't believe it when I was told this after doing everything I could to get healthy. I have 3 more weeks of radiation now. The worse thing for me was that I was told not to swim. I was swimming almost everyday. All of a sudden I couldn't do it anymore and so I started to put on some weight. I decided to start going to the gym everyday I had treatment to at least ride a bike. I'm headed back down again but it's tough.

    I had new pictures taken on Friday and am worried about talking to the doctor on Monday because the way the girls were acting. (I'm sure you know what I mean) Another thing I had a hard time with for awhile is always feeling like something else is wrong. Every bump. Every ache. I'm getting over that now.

    A friend of yours emailed me and said I might like to read your blog. I'm so sorry you have to go through this but in the end... you will be better, emotionally, spiritually and physically.

    Yvonne
    1765 days ago
  • MT-MOONCHASER
    Chin up, Tisha.

    One of my sisters had breast cancer. She was diagnosed about 10 years ago and had a mastectomy and underwent chemo and radiation. She is now doing great and she just celebrated her 70th birthday last week.

    The treatments today are far more accurate than they were then, so keep your good thoughts going.
    emoticon

    emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • CJMOK1121
    Tisha: You have always been a great encouragement to me, Thank you for sharing and my HUGS, HUGS, PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU. One of our other friends on sp had a double mastectomy and a year of chemo, she is finished with both now and has written several blogs, her sp name is RUBYDOODLE, or Kay. They will probably be very uplifting to you.

    HUGS and PRAYERS: CJ from OK.
    1765 days ago
  • JAOTAO
    Thank you Tish for sharingi - so well expressed . And Thank you for shining light on a difficult subject, your feelings, and the process. Sending you much love and prayers, and healing light energy.

    Love, Jackie O
    1765 days ago
  • SPEEDY143
    emoticon Thank you for sharing Tisha.. I know it was a hard thing to put it all in black and white. Makes it even more real, if that's even possible. You have a support system here that has benefited from your weight-loss journey.. your successful years of maintenance and bumps in the road as you've literally stumbled, fell down and got back up more determined than ever. Yes, you are my SHE-ro emoticon you are the perfect example of a "Sparkpeople" success story emoticon emoticon And I truly believe you will concur cancer as well. That's what people like you do emoticon

    I'm praying for you dear friend emoticon and sending love and light for your highest good emoticon You've touched so many of us on this path.. now it's our turn to support YOU emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • DOLLIE6
    Will be praying. emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • no profile photo CD16110307
    Have faith that the surgery will go well and you'll be fine. I'll add you to my prayer list. emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • MEWHENRYSMAMA
    Tisha, you know I am here for you! I know you are there for me! I think sharing your story is good...you should be able to come here and say whatever you need to say...about what's going on and how you feel about it! We are here to support you through this journey every step of the way! I hope it helps you to know that!
    You will be in my thoughts and prayers this Wednesday the 27th! I pray that all the surgery you will need! And as you move towards your radiation therapy please know we are here!
    Much Love, Friendship and many Hugs!
    Mary
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • TERI-RIFIC
    It's good to share and get support. You are right -stay positive- the word cancer is hard to hear, but the treatments are so effective, now , you have every reason to be positive!
    1765 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13354694
    emoticon emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • HDEGMD
    You are my hero in another direction now.....for sharing this with everyone.Thank you. I am here for YOU every step of your journey with thoughts and prayers. LOVE, Pat
    1765 days ago
  • no profile photo NANCYRUTAN
    Your attitude is great! You will beat this!
    1765 days ago
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