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"A Man Walks Into A Bar"

Monday, May 01, 2017

"A Man Walks Into A Bar"

A man walks into a bar with his little Jack Russell terrier.
He puts the dog on the barstool next to his.
The bartender wanders over and the man says, ‘I’ll have a pot thanks, mate.’ The dog says, ‘I’ll have a margarita.’
The bartender does a double-take and looks over to the dog and asks, ‘Did you just talk?’
‘Yep,’ says the dog.
‘My God!’ says the bartender. ‘That’s incredible. This is unreal. Who would have thought: a talking dog, here in my bar? Tell me more about yourself. You must have had an amazing life as a talking dog.’
The dog assumes an indifferent pose and speaks in quite a matter-of-fact manner:
‘Yeah, you could say it’s been a big journey. I trained for a while with the US Marines. Saw a bit of action in Iraq – can’t tell you more. I joined the Bolshoi Ballet for a stint. That was hard work but incredibly satisfying. I’ve written a few best-selling novels in my spare time. That was good fun. Of course, there have been film offers, TV shows. Wine, women and song. All that!
The bartender is now purple with excitement. He turns to the man. ‘We could make a fortune. We could charge people to come into this bar and hear your dog talk. How much would you charge to allow your dog to talk here?’
‘About $10,’ the man replies.
‘Why only $10? That’s madness!’ exclaims the bartender.
The man answers: ‘He’s a liar. He hasn’t done half those things.’
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