A Year in Review
Saturday, November 25, 2017
Looking at myself this time last year, I was doing so well. I was on a steady trajectory on the healthy living path. I was eating good, working out, was steadily losing weight, felt good for the most part. I was proud of how well I was doing and the changes that were occurring.
Fast forward one year. I'm almost 40 lbs heavier, out of shape, depressed, unmotivated, frustrated with my body.
The reason for this? My physical health has taken a turn for the worse. Between my fibromyalgia, rheumatoid arthritis, and degenerative disease in multiple areas, I've been in constant pain for the past year. I'm working my way through the recommended medications because nothing seems to be helping.
Because of the depression, I seem to have taken a back seat in my own life. I have to find a way to get out of this year long funk and get motivated to try to make some changes. Even if I can't lift weights anymore, I can try to walk in the pool even though my feet hurt too. I'm going to try tai chi, just try something to get my body moving, hopefully without adding to the already existing pain. I can get better control of my eating. Drink more water. Take my vitamins.
After a year, I think I'm finally coming to a place where I'm frustrated enough with my body and with myself for letting it get to this place that it's catapulting me to change. I have to realize I'm going to have good days and I'm going to have bad days. The key will be to try to stay motivated throughout and continue on the journey to the best of my ability. To remind myself that I'm not that same person who used to be able to leg press 720 lbs, who used to run and bike. To stop comparing my current self to my old self. That old me is gone, never to return. If I can just walk without pain, I'd be pretty happy.
So here goes to trying to start back on that trajectory to healthy living again. Hopefully, this time next year I can write another year in review and see a healthier, more active, more positive me, in spite of the pain.