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What do you REALLY want?

Saturday, February 10, 2018

Ok, what do I really want?

I want to be a normal size; I don't need to be skinny.
I want to wear fun clothes and not pick clothes that just fit.
I want to have energy to do anything I want.
I want to be healthy, and not worry about diabetes.
I want to be proud of myself.

Sadly I have opposing desires.

I want to sit on my couch and watch TV. Or take a nap.
I want to eat and drink whatever I feel like.

Guess who's winning? Depends on the day, really.
I need to remind myself of my goals often.
How badly do I want to lose weight? Again, it depends.
Some days I'm just too tired to care.

I've been reading The Beck Diet Solution, and the first thing I'm instructed to do is to make a list of all the reasons I want to lose weight. A comprehensive list. And read the list at least twice a day. Not just a quick glance, but really read each item, and call to mind why that reason is important. Add to the list as more reasons come to mind. And they will.

I'd totally forgotten to do this over the last few days. Maybe I need to post my list somewhere so I don't forget again.

'Cuz I have a LOT of reasons!

So what do YOU really want? And how badly?
Would a habit like this help you?

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I have an inner battle too emoticon
    484 days ago
    Good list, easy turn it into an Advantages Response Card!
    And we cannot have it all, eat and drink whatever we fancy AND the advantages of a healthy weight.
    But the BDS book helps to make dieting easier, and make our life more pleasant.
    1019 days ago
  • WHITE-2
    I would think that it's not really so like there are two different people living in your body, one that wants to work on weight loss and the other just wants to indulge. I think that you want to lose weight but you have obstacles to overcome. Such as being too busy / overburdened which makes you tired which makes EVERYTHING about weight loss and willpower harder. Such as not having had enough of a chance to experience the joy of healhty habits. Such as maybe being sensitive to certain foods that make you crave them.
    Personally I often feel that while I WANT to do x and y (exercise, resist an urge to overeat), I sometimes just don't have the strength. It may be better to see it as 'I just don't have the strength' and see how you can build up the strength than to see it as if two opposite powers are struggling within you.

    Re: reading advantages every day: I admit I find it difficult to do that consistently. I do feel that J. Beck has a point. Maybe even better than to re-read the advantages daily is to get into a habit of TELLING yourself (thinking) about them at a moment when you feel tempted. When I was in BED treatment we were taught to, whenever we were tempted to binge, think 'I want a steady eating pattern'. (We could not say 'I want to be thin' or 'I want to lose weight' because that was not the goal of the treatment, but you could say 'I want to lose weight' or 'I want to stick to my food plan' instead of 'I want a steady eating pattern').
    To say that to myself saved me from bingeing quite a few times. So that definitely does work.
    It's important to learn to say to yourself 'I want (....)' at a time when you feel like doing something that goes against your REAL desire of being healthier / losing weight.

    You could also say when you feel you need to, for example... go exercise or cook a healthy meal: 'It's true that I don 't feel like doing this and I'm tired, BUT, I'm going to do it anyway'. That way you acknowledge that part that is reluctant but you can still move in the right direction.
    1021 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/11/2018 3:48:09 AM
  • DSJB9999
    emoticon It is REALLY hard to remember the reasons sonedays when 'life' gets in the way! For me the 100 DWL gives little of reminders daily and I intend to keep reading a day each day and hope one of the useful ones will be at the right time!

    Take a walk before you get on the sofa and take less snacks with you, baby steps! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1021 days ago
    It sounds like your saboteurs or inner child is screaming to be wat she want. I had same issue before but not much lately. You might want to try to have inner dialogue with her for better out came for both of you.
    Yes, I think reading the list will be very helpful. For me abstinence of sugar flour caffeine has helping me a lot and starting not crave those foods so much. I guess that old saying whichever you feeds win!
    Have a wonderful weekend my friend.

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    1021 days ago
    Most excellent blog! I could've written it myself. Happy to share the journey with you!
    1021 days ago
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