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first day....rinse and do not repeat.

Monday, November 12, 2018

Oh, the accuracy of my horoscope today.

LIBRA 11-12 You may be working really hard to stay busy and improve things in your life. The memories of those from the past have been the hardest thing to escape. You find yourself missing someone today and the life you once had. It could be an emotional day if you dwell on the way things used to be. It is time to adapt and move on , time will heal the wounds.

It is funny the things we remember. Especially with social media memories at the ready every morning when you log in.
Pictures, even memories dont let us feel the way we felt in that moment.
and eventually the feelings associated with the picture, the memories begins to lessen.
This time two years ago I guess you could say I was as near to rock bottom in my life as one can get. But that is in the past and even though I will probably never forget, in a way that is good, because it just serves to remind me where I dont want to ever go, things I dont ever want to experience, and feelings I dont ever want to feel again.
So to anyone out there feeling lost, feeling given up on, feeling lesser than zero, just know that one day those feelings will just be a reminder and a push to do better and not ever go back.
even painful memories can be a good thing. I read memes and hear people say you have to leave the past behind you, you have to stop looking back, etc.
But the way I feel about it is, that pain, that memory of the way you felt or even, your health, your weight, your depression, whatever it is that reminds you can be a good thing.
It can serve to catupult you forward....because if it brings you pain to think about it, you surely will learn a lesson.
At least one can hope.

That said, today I decided its time to move forward and stop living vicariously thru the weight loss and good workouts of the past and start again.
Can you really call it starting again if you never really stopped?
Maybe just hit a glitch, had to get a jump.
I am not going to make any grand claims that I cant stand by. But I am just going to say that each minute of each day is going to be a try....try as hard as I can to stay in the right frame of mind, to do RIGHT.
I know I might take a tumble along the way but I will keep on trying,
So, today I have had my egg spinach ham omelet and am going to get on the treadmill and that is just me trying.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • COOP9002
    Great job
    718 days ago
    Good for you! You are trying as hard as you can, and that is the best anyone can do. I'm sorry you have had such painful memories to deal with, but if you can use them as motivation as you are, you are ahead. Life is good but it is not always fair or easy or happy. However, we can choose to be happy, and that is what you are doing. Great!
    718 days ago
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