MORTICIAADDAMS
500,000-749,999 SparkPoints 646,849
SparkPoints
 

White Stuff - It Better Be Dandruff

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Nope, it's snow. I HATE SNOW!!!!!!!!!! We are 22 hours into our 27 hour Winter Storm Warning. The T.V. station, southwest of us in the next state, mentioned that people in our county should not get out due to the slick roads, cars which have slid off the roads, and wrecks. But, in our area, when the weather is at it's worst, the 80 and 90 year old half-senile, hard-heads who mostly compose the population here, who are rattling with every pill known to modern man in their guts and heads, feel the need to prove that they are road worthy.................. they are not. They were out in mass yesterday buying cart fulls of emergency supplies, should they be snowed in...... things like Christmas ornaments. Yes, I'm serious. There are usually 9 goofy shoppers buying tinsel for every one shopper buying necessities like water, batteries, toilet paper, etc. Some of the oldsters have carts full of cookies and vodka, Scotch, Tequila ,etc. I guess some of them have to work up their courage before they, unintentionally or intentionally, do doughnuts on the mall parking lot.

My dad was one of these monsters and some of my sparkfriends, who were fond of his extreme zaniness, remember his driving me up the wall with this reoccurring problem. Where dad lived is up and down hills, curving back and forth, constantly for miles on end. Very remote. The longest 11+ miles in the universe, even in good weather, according to my uncle. While driving in another county far from his home, Dad would call on his cell phone (blatantly illegal) in the midst of a blizzard while the state police were closing the interstate because something "urgent" had came up. This was usually along the lines of "Shorty said that some market in Hooterville was selling kumquats for 27 cents a pound."


Me: Kumquats??!!! Have you heard the weather report, Dad? Noticed anything unusual?!! Like the 70mph wind and blinding snow?

Dad: I don't like kumquats but my neighbor, Pooter MaGraw, loves them. That is a great price.

Me: Dad!!!!!!!!!! Can you hear me??!!! They don't want people out driving!!!!!!!! Especially for kumquats for neighbors!!! There is a blizzard, Dad. OMG!!!! I'm freaking out!

Dad: Oh, I have 4 wheel drive. I can go anywhere. Don't worry. Nothing stops me.

Me: I can guarantee the state police can. If they arrest you, Dad, don't call us. Call Jeff (half-brother). And, don't be drinking either!!!! I'm serious, Dad. Don't drink!!!!

Dad: I've only had 2 beers with Porkchop Hayes, (and as my hubby always accurately pointed out - dad had 2 beers PLUS 2 oxycontin - his limit).



SCREAM!! Dad would fret about what an unfun old lady I had become, almost as bad as his aunts and his mother. Always fretting about soberness and safety and laws. Accusing me of being determined to live to be 105, like some of the other old ladies in the family. What a horrible goal! Nothing worse than a crusty old nag.

Yep, I hate, hate, hate snow. Fall, which looks and feels exactly like Winter here this year, sucks something awful, thus far. We went directly from Summer into Winter. Three snows in the last week and we often don't have snow until December, usually mid or sometimes even late December. Grrrrr. My hubby's boss called early this morning while we were still asleep to tell us that they were having work..........................
grrr. I thought he was calling to cancel work. So we got up early and ..............................
....grrrrrrr........... I didn't love it. I have had to already go outside and walk the 200 feet and then trudge back uphill in the snow (or 10 miles to school) to clean off the frigging satellite dish. Grrrrrrrr. And if I have to go out there and do it again, well, I'm going to............................
...........grrrrrrrrrr.

This weather has made me ravenous. Could be the prednisone too but, at any rate, I could eat the broadside of a barn. I am looking online for HEALTHY FILLING snacks/meals that won't involve me draining a silo and I pulled up the most ridiculous bull hoffer. Maybe I need a new search engine.

I haven't accomplished much today other than growl. I am staying home - working on making it to 105. I guess I should try do one important thing today, at least. I saw on T.V. where people were making Kookaburra sounds. I think this sounds like something right up my alley! Cackling chuckles and hoots. I'm all in for it! Tata for now!

Things I hate - definitely SNOW

Things I love - Beaches and Kookaburras
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • KATIE5668
    Then home again following the center line. Sings a song & by second verse is at his driveway. With luck he is right & doesn't end up in a ditch. There is a phone chain...Look out Old Tom is headed to town! Gotta love them old coots!
    41 days ago
  • KATIE5668
    Sounds like my tiny country town. Old Tom lives about 5 or so miles out. Drives to town by leaning out to look at center line on road since he can't see the front of his car. Parks dead middle of main Street to walk over to "the general store".
    41 days ago
  • CAROLFAITHWALKR
    Part of that sounded just like my mom used to, LOL.
    177 days ago
  • BECCABOO127
    This is so cute! Better late than never. emoticon
    229 days ago
  • LOSER05
    we have a Jeep Cherokee, no problems emoticon
    296 days ago
  • SUSANNAH31
    You had me laughing out loud while reading your blog! emoticon

    Stay warm and dry inside while the snow is falling.
    It is coming to the east coast in a couple of days, so we will be joining you.

    Hugs.

    Sue
    emoticon


    299 days ago
  • SUNSHINE5268
    (((((( hugs ))))))
    322 days ago
  • SUZYMOBILE
    Miss you, woman, as I'm sure you do me. I've made myself too damn busy with this newspaper gig.


    327 days ago
  • SUZYMOBILE
    "Oh, I have 4 wheel drive. I can go anywhere." Love it!
    327 days ago
  • JSTETSER
    kUMQUATS! my mom is 96. She would say something like that.
    327 days ago
  • SOULFISH80
    Snow is a beast!!!!! Funny antics involving your father, lol. I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time. Have a very merry Christmas!!!!!
    334 days ago
  • TEDYBEAR2838
    I best not see SNOW in FLORIDA!

    I like looking at it, but that's about it.


    341 days ago
  • READYRISA
    I'm not fond of snow either...
    emoticon
    341 days ago
  • REGILIEH
    LOL
    343 days ago
  • REGILIEH
    emoticon
    343 days ago
  • SUNSHINE5268
    {{{{{{ hugs to you my precious friend ))))))))))))) emoticon great blog! emoticon
    351 days ago
  • OVERWORKEDJANET
    I missed this blog in my travels.

    Huh.

    Cookies and booze.
    357 days ago
  • KSNANA2
    Thanks for the laugh this morning! I needed it! Not getting enough sleep here and staying too busy to get on SP much. New puppy and trying to get ready for house guests. Who thought it was a good idea to get a puppy in the fall which acts like winter? Oh right. That was me. emoticon
    357 days ago
  • ENDUROVET
    Ai yi yi!!! Well, the latest news is my mom said she “wants to talk” about MY dad - but of course face to face, not by cell phone when **I** was driving home...
    Hopefully this means she is ready to either accept home health care, or let me begin the hard work of selecting a memory care facility for him.

    358 days ago
  • TERRIMMIX
    Having lived in the south all my life, if I was ever somewhere it snows, even a dusting... I'd be hibernating for the winter... no idea how to drive in the stuff and freely admit it! Great blog! Had me laughing just imagining your exchange with your dad. emoticon
    358 days ago
  • CHRISTINEBWD
    Love your blog! I don't care for snow either!!! Your dad sounds like a character! :-)
    We will survive! Hugs,
    Christine
    359 days ago
  • SRWYLIE
    I can't get over how early winter came this year. Our niece Jamie lost control and went to a ditch on I-64. Thankfully she's ok and so is the car. Of course, she posted on Facebook WHILE she was in the ditch. At least we knew where she was and that she was ok, not that we could do anything about it from California.

    I remember the blizzard of 2004. We had just moved to Evansville the previous July and wanted to spend Christmas with Steve's mom in Henderson. We could only drive about 20mph on the freeway and ended up in a snowdrift on the street because her driveway was still covered. It was amazing that we even got out of there safely - we did not have 4WD at the time. The following year we traded our SUV for one that did! It was beautiful and scary at the same time.

    I'm not a fan of the cold. We're in the 50s here and already my skin just wants to bathe in moisturizer constantly. But we will be back there this Christmas and excited. I hope the weather is reasonably cooperative (we're driving so we can bring back some furniture for the nieces).

    Thanks for the smiles this morning. Your dialog with your dad just cracked me up! Have a great day!
    359 days ago
  • GINIEMIE
    Oh my goodness! I don’t have snow, to bad hubby had to go in, My sister in Missouri is grumbling about the snow too, and my sil had no power. Hope there was no more need to clean off the satellite dish, thank God I live in Georgia.
    I hate ice more then snow.
    Your dad sounds like he was a handful. emoticon emoticon emoticon
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    359 days ago
  • SUNNYBEACHGIRL
    I am so sorry that winter has come early. Maybe it will leave early. you can hope
    360 days ago
  • MINNIEUK
    Your Dad and my Grandad would've got on like a house on fire, and caused chaos together! emoticon

    Wishing you sunshine to melt all your snow! emoticon emoticon
    360 days ago
  • JAZZYGF
    this had me laughing even though snow and lots of it no fun.we had ice tns craking limbs some on our road so by 10am chainsaw with out falling from ice.
    getting out of house well lets just say I needed to be careful
    I hate ice snow maybe better but that much snow a no no
    they say by thanksgiving 59 what emoticon
    360 days ago
  • SLIMMERJESSE
    I couldn't believe my eyes and had to check twice - yup, a blog from you!!!! So nice to hear from you; miss you when you don't blog. Yes, I hated snow so much that I high-tailed it outta Dodge soon after high school. Have a warm, cozy day.
    360 days ago
  • GRLTAZ
    You crack me up but I can see your concern and frustration. Selfish/ dementia/ under the influence people like that always keep the emergency people in a job but sad that the people that really need help can not or may not get timely help. ON a positive note, you are retired so you only have to help get hubby off safely and pray hard all day that he stays safe. If you lose your TV signal again, maybe try a hobby you have not had the time to do ? It will help distract the mind from worry. Push onward !
    360 days ago
  • VALLEYGIRLSPAGE
    We had 7 inches of snow yesterday with a layer of freezing rain.. all over the news people were told to stay off the roadways so the plows can clear them....nope people don't hear that they get in their cars and go out in the storm anyway...the interstate was shut down and people were stuck ...the last I seen on the news before going to bed it was 5 hours the cars were still sitting while the snow kept coming down.. People are crazy some clueless. I stayed off the roads and shoveling snow off the sidewalks while hubby plowed.
    I hate shoveling snow... I rather be sitting on a beach chair watching the waves.
    emoticon blog emoticon
    360 days ago
  • CONTROUBLE
    Prednisone - gah! That stuff gave me the absolute worst munchies. It snowed up here twice today. It stuck to the grass the second time during my drive home from work. It took me almost 2 hours to get home - I HATE SNOW!!!
    361 days ago
  • 1CRAZYDOG
    emoticon You have nailed it!
    361 days ago
  • MT-MOONCHASER
    emoticon This b!og gave me my chuckle for the day!!!

    I hope your day went better, no trips out to the satellite dish.

    emoticon
    361 days ago
  • SHIRLEYX
    Winter's bad enough, scary drivers are worse. Stay safe and warm at home. emoticon
    361 days ago
  • SARA180
    It's snowing by us too . I think I have to force myself out of kitchen or I will start eating comfort food
    361 days ago
  • BETHGILLIGAN
    emoticon
    361 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.