4 days in with intangible results!
Wednesday, October 16, 2019
I've always been health conscious; perhaps its an innate blip on my DNA like the propensity for high cholesterol readings that I inherited. My physical appearance has typically been on the lean side and my personality is that of a pent up squirrel always on the move. So here I am at Spark People, DAY FOUR of seriously and consciously rebooting my strength, stamina, willpower while tracking food and exercise. I know the drill of what I need to do vs what I want to do vs awareness of the implications. It's a tough talk and walk!
My gym membership is decades old ~ what a gift to self as I've made great friends there over the course of time. What started as intimidation, and it still exists when old equipment is replaced with something new, it brings an unmatched comradery of exploration. Inspiration at the gym comes in so many forms and includes the marathon trainer (it's not my goat but their tenacity is unmatched!l), the New Year's resolution pack in January (sorry, but most of you fail as this is an investment of self, but welcome and I hope you succeed), its the Senior Sneakers that are DILIGENT in showing up each day to maintain movement (YOU TRULY INSPIRE ME!) and it's overweight person that mustered up the courage to enter the doors with the deer in the headlights look that I make contact with and encourage them to come back and seek me out if they have questions.
My personal demise was just that "life happens" and my fitness routines got stagnant and I was called to other time intensive home projects. While I moved, I also ate during that season of showing up a the gym but not able to make the most of it. I enhanced some relationships over that course of time, but that often is blanketed in food and drink! My investment in other details made my weight increase and yes, even finding the ability to finally let go in a toxic family relationship also stimulated my appetite. I say my weight gain was a sign of healing and shedding of any responsibility of fixing a dead horse! I found a new internal control button that I can use as a resource. I know I was too thin during the extreme toxic era that lasted for years as stress and anxiety literally made me nauseous. I've fixed that now and feel whole again. DAMN I wish I didn't have this much weight gain with wisdom and voice but it happens to the best of us.
Finding the times that are right for motion is key and in FOUR DAYS I've gotten back into feet on the ground, a cup of coffee and dressed for the gym to start my day and it feels GREAT! I may not have shed inches, increased muscle mass yet, dropped to my goal weight, but I feel great!! I look forward to showering and dressing for the day vs wearing yoga pants and loose fitting attire. My mood is improved and my days feel full of purpose and energy in four days! My eating habits are changing, while still healthy they are back into portion control. I'm experimenting with ways to avoid my binging episodes that come on in the evening. It's one step at a time and it's an awareness of self physically, psychologically and spiritually.
The apps of Spark People has ignited the internal force for me to get back on track and stay on track, continue to inspire others and provide some accountability with tangible logs, graphs and data. Its time to reclaim the self I had, restore the spirit and rejuvenate the energy so I can be my best self and resource to others. Have a blessed day ya'll and reach out and initiate a spark of hope in someone else today. X