Friday, November 15, 2019
SIGH~~~~~ I am trying to be upbeat and positive today. Even though I still have a lot on my mind. I have been up since 3 am crying. So much happiness to so much sorrow in such a quick time. I put make up on today in an effort to not cry today. It didn't work but I was better. I did get the tiniest bit of peace yesterday from a talk with the one with the brain tumor. That person absolutely means the world to me. That person has been missing from my life (24 years because we both were manipulated and never knew it until this year) for way too long and came back in earlier this year after an automobile accident that should have killed him. Now this. 6 months. Incredible months every single day building together a close bond. I am so thankful to have that time. I pray for his healing. My son's father. They were just getting to know each other. And my son is 26. It breaks my heart. I have to suck it up and just go on and be strong for both of them. This is so incredibly hard. So incredibly painful. Our son doesn't know yet about the tumor. Ugh so that is a bit of more detail into what's going on with me and my life.
I weighed back and forth this morning between 161.8 and 162 lbs. The scale couldn't decide. I had a non scale victory. I fit into my favorite coat with lots of extra room. I got 4 new shirts today because...I have no clothes left. I looked at pants but decided to wait to see how much more I lose. I figure shirts can be worn longer than pants if they get too big.
Ok I have a TON of stuff to do this weekend.
Update my son has been told now. His father told him.