15 November 2019
Saturday, November 16, 2019
Coaching Notes - Day 2
Today, imagine that you decline someone who offers you a tempting treat because you know it won't fit into your food budget for the day. What do you say? How do you remain firm? How does it feel to know that you are in control of what you eat? Think about this scenario the next time you're tempted to give in.}
I ... huh. I don't actually have a food budget. As part of learning to trust my body and healing my badly broken relationship with food, I avoid any kind of restrictions (other than ethical/spiritual taboos or medically mandated stuff). I don't assign good or bad values to foods, but instead consider whether or not whatever yummything I'm thinking about eating is worth it in terms of my overall goals of becoming healthier. How do I feel in the scenario above? Do I feel pressured to eat because of social expectation, or is it something I genuinely desire? How much pleasure would the yummything bring me compared to knowing it will slow my progress toward greater health? A donut probably isn't worth it. A few bites of Princess Cake are absolutely worth it. I mean, Princess Cake!
In an odd way, I feel like being flexible and responsive to each individual situation actually gives me more control over how I nourish myself than if I stick to a strict, externally determined food budget. That approach has never, ever worked for me in the past; instead inspiring all kinds of disordered eating, often in the form of wild binges when I finally give in, followed by shame and a feeling that I should just give up on all my efforts and then all kinds of self-destructive behavior. I'm trying hard to learn to look at food as just food. It nourishes me or doesn't, it adds to my health or doesn't, but it's not inherently good or bad. It's important to me that I remain firm in my commitment to mindful eating, to honoring my body and my hunger and my desire to be healthier. That's how I'd measure victory in this scenario.
This week's action step is to choose and track my fast break goals. My current goals are to keep journaling, get at least 10 minutes of exercise every day, and add a fruit or veggie to every meal. So far, so good!