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Mental Health and girl friends

Sunday, November 17, 2019

November 1 - I am blessed to live in rural Montana
November 2 - I am blessed to have this beautiful home
November 3 - I am thankful for all volunteers especially volunteer firefighters.
November 4 - I am thankful for my wonderful husband who I should treat better.
November 5 - Thankful I survived 1.5 hours in the MRI. Looking forward to results.
November 6 - I am thankful they found something even if I don't like the answer.
November 7 - I am thankful my great nephew is out of the hospital and home again.
November 8 - I am thankful for my son and daughter and so proud of the adults they have become.
November 9 - I am thankful for compassionate and listening DRs who spend a long time at school and then face long hours at work. I am also thankful for their assistants, nurses, and other staff.
November 10 - Today is Sunday and I am thankful I am blessed by God.
November 11 - I am a veteran and thankful that we and active duty members are recognized and thanked for their sacrifice. I am thankful men and women continue to volunteer to serve their country. emoticon
November 12 - Thankful for good friends who are always there when you ask for help.
November 13 - I am thankful for living in a wonderful small community that came together to recognize our veterans last night
November 14 - I am thankful for a lot less pain in my hip, thigh and knee. I think the shot is working.
November 15 - I am thankful my husband's trip to the ER yesterday was not serious. Either a gall bladder attack or gastroenteritis.
November 16 - I am thankful for the fun filled day we had in Billings. Girls' day out.
November 17 - I am thankful my husband and I have our own different things that we do as well as the ones we do together.

I have two girl friends that seemed to be joined at the hip with their husbands. They very rarely do anything with other people or even by themselves away from home. One friend is 62 and her husband is 80. The other friend is 71 and her husband is 69. The 62 year old is having a terrible time dealing with her husbands advanced age. there are some signs of dementia. Yesterday I took them on a girls' day out. Shopping and lunch. They both sparked up, were not so down at the mouth. The 62 year old, however, continually harps on all the things her husband is doing wrong or says he can't do or he doesn't remember how. She is grieving for the man she married. In stead of being patient and helping him, she corrects him. I could go on, but you see the picture. AND I get to hear about all of it. I know she needs to vent but I am getting to the point of shutting her up. I have talked a lot about different ways to deal with what she is facing and it wasn't heard or it was ignored. So for my mental health, I may tell her she is choosing to be antagonistic and unhappy and I don't want to hear about it any more. My other choice? Be a bubble head, tune out when she gets started and say yes at appropriate places.

I will probably do the later as girl friends are important for my mental health and she is one of two. I can;t afford to lose her as my other one is going to CA for the winter.

We had fun yesterday. I am glad my husband and I have our own vehicles (these two women only have one with their husbands) which allows us to have some independence from each other. I personally think that is a key element to a happy marriage.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I so understand this situation. I'm 50 and have two girlfriend here near me. One is 83 and the other 41. They vent a lot (and have many problems in their lives) and sometimes it can be difficult for me to listen to their complains. I was so very tired after spending time with them. I didn't know what to do and after some time I got an idea. I started to pray for them and myself every single day after my meditation in the morning. I pray for peace and harmony for them, because they really need it in their lives. And for me, because I would like more peace into my life, why not? I say: "God, please give them peace and harmony, peace and harmony." And then: "God, please give me peace and harmony, peace and harmony."It works! I can be more serene while listing to their stories and they are more at peace while talking to me. emoticon
    25 days ago
    I love your gratitude list! Thank you for your service.

    You are being a good friend. I'm sure she feels lost with her husband's symptoms. Maybe a gentle chat that you see what is happening, suggest a support group and then let it go.

    I hope you have a beautiful week!

    26 days ago
    Yay for diplomacy!! There seems to be too little of it in the world today...

    26 days ago
    I hear you girlfriend.. keep them all close😁
    26 days ago
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