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The bad and the good

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

January 6th I had a complete meltdown/flare up of mental health symptoms... to the extent my niece took me to the ER, where I was given the option of either voluntary admission if I wanted more control over my discharge plan... or the on call doctor would do an involuntary admission, where I would have little to no control over discharge. No other options were available at that point. I was in too much distress. So I signed myself in as a voluntary admission. It took me a full week to start feeling back on an even keel and then I had to stay two more days both to run out the 72 hour discharge notice I submitted, and for the NP I saw to see that I could string together a couple of good days. I was released 1/15/20. The day after I was released I had to go to Jamestown for a medical test that had been scheduled for two months, and Friday I had an appointment with my therapist. Monday I had a follow up mammogram and ultrasound (no significant changes... yay!), Tuesday I had another appointment with my therapist, followed by an appointment with my neurologist, and a short field trip to Rochester to hear a presentation on criminal justice data gathering and bail reform (a hot topic here in NY), and today I had an appointment with my psychiatrist and group therapy... and tomorrow I have a follow up appointment for the test I had last week. And tomorrow I am starting to pack up my apartment! We talk a lot about stress being stress... whether it’s good or bad... it’s still stress. So, my good stress is that I found a new apartment and will be moving in two months. Thank goodness! I have been talking about wanting to move for months and yet not really doing anything about it, but I finally got off my duff and made things happen. I get the keys March 1st, but I plan to take a full month to make the move. (I own a lot of books... a LOT of books, and I want to pack them in alphabetical order like I have them shelved, which takes more time than just tossing them in a box...). It will also be physically easier to move bit by bit than one big push from which I would have to spend a week recovering, lol. While I am packing and recovering from my hospital stay I have been staying at my dad’s house whenever possible. I can actually sleep here, and I feel comfortable. I have high hopes for the new apartment too. I haven’t been good about tracking food or exercise for the past two weeks (no access when I was in the hospital, and just haven’t gotten back into the groove), but I am starting to get back into it on a more regular basis. I know it helps me stay on track. I will get there again. Wherever you are in the world I hope you have a marvelous night!
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  • KAREN_EDMONDS
    So sorry you were going through all of that. Glad you did get the help you needed. Hope you enjoy your new appartment. Take time to take care of yourself. Hugs!
    17 days ago
  • DIANEDOESSMILES
    YEAH Chandra on the new apartment!! PHEW!! Hopefully you'll be able to sleep peacefully in the new apartment!! It makes such a difference!! Plus knowing that stress is GONE (Hopefully) helps our mental health to improve. Though minus that added stress of a negative living environment is gone, the health stuff will be there etc, but your outlook will be easier.

    So sorry Chandra about the hospitalization, but I've been there too,,, it's been quite awhile, but it sure did help!! That help made me the girl you know today who's finally happy and positive, and loving myself.

    Cooper will thrive seeing/feeling/knowing you are happier. SMART move taking your time doing the move!! I had to do it in I think 3 days (it was the end of the month, I didn't want to pay extra) and just hired a mover. For me, that was a good move.

    CONGRATS!!
    21 days ago
  • KSNANA2
    I hope this move will be a good one you will enjoy. Sorry you are having so many health problems. One of my grown DD's has a friend with Bi-polar and he was having a lot of problems when his meds were no longer working. Takes time to figure out and get it all settled again. I hope you have as much luck as he had getting your life back on track. It sure hurts while you are going through it though! Hang in there! Better days ahead!
    30 days ago
  • DUCKTURNIP
    I was in the mental hospital back in 2014. It really, really helped me out in the long run. It sounds like we had similar experiences. Keep doing your therapy and working on getting healthy. Eating well and exercise helps with that too.
    31 days ago
  • FLORIDASUN
    Oh my sweet sweet one! I'm so sorry I have been out of the loop! I think about you and the Coop all the time and I'm so very sorry I'm not closer to give you some special hugs and good wishes in person.

    You have sooooo many things to stay on top of and you do an absolutely admirable job! Your doctor appointments ARE a full time job...but it's good to stay on top of your health.

    I have to say I LOVE my CBD oil (Lazurus) on line. I truly believe they are the only thing that allow me to sleep at night! Do check them out...they have a wonderful discount for military or lower income. A really GREAT discount...

    I am praying for you. I have a zillion books also. I truly could open a bookstore...and I have SO many beads...I could open a bead store.

    I can't even imagine moving but I know in the back of my mind it could be a possibility some day. I even went to see a really cute little cottage home today...REALLY small and old..but very cute. Who knows...it's good to stay open-minded.

    Hugs to you my sweet virtual daughter! emoticon I'm sorry I'm I've been such a bad virtual momma! emoticon
    32 days ago
  • DESERTDREAMERS
    Wow, good news about the new apartment! O more weird people around you. So sorry you’ve been having medical problems. I hope that works out for you, too. emoticon
    33 days ago
  • MOMTOLJ
    Hi Leslie: I'm happy you're back home. At this point in your life, I suggest you concentrate on your health and all those appointments to be sure you get back on track. This can be a full time job on it's own.

    Will you be all moved by March 1rst? That's a huge thing to do and it could be a new beginning: new environment, rearranging it all, making this next apartment personalized and ake it your home. I'm in the process of doing just that

    Take good care of you. You are number 1 in your life. If you're not ok you can't look after anyone else. You matter!!! emoticon and emoticon
    33 days ago
  • AKA_TROUBLE
    emoticon emoticon
    34 days ago
  • GARDENCHRIS
    I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. Hang in there things will get better. Glad your niece was with you to look after you emoticon
    34 days ago
  • HAPPYSOUL91
    Glad you are moving into a new apartment. Sorry you had a bad time but you are now on the upside of it emoticon
    34 days ago
  • WARRIORSUE518

    My gosh!

    Sending you lots of love as you get done all you've got to do!!
    34 days ago
  • 1CRAZYDOG
    OH, Chandra, so sorry you were in so much distress! But you have a LOT going on. Wow! A new apartment. Sounds like you have a good plan for the move.

    I HOPE you’re feeling better. Good you can stay w/your Dad and feel comfortable there.

    HUGS and prayers.

    34 days ago
  • MIRELICA
    I was thinking about you and then I read your comment on your page about getting out of hospital. I'm glad you are OK now. Take care of yourself and all the best with the move. emoticon
    35 days ago
  • NELLJONES
    I'm glad you found an apartment, and have time to move methodically. It's something to look forward to!
    35 days ago
  • CHERIRIDDELL
    I am so glad you have a new apartment I think the strress of the old place was not helping.
    35 days ago
  • ROCKYCPA
    emoticon - glad you are doing better and looking forward to moving to your new apartment.
    35 days ago
  • KATRINAKAT23
    I am so glad you are doing better and yippee on the new apartment. emoticon emoticon
    35 days ago
  • _CYNDY55_
    emoticon Said a Prayer for You emoticon
    35 days ago
  • MNABOY
    I despise moving!
    35 days ago
  • CATHYSFITLIFE
    Goodness, you have a lot going on and I'm really sorry you ended up having a complete meltdown/flare up of mental health symptoms. I know it's been quite a while since I've read one of your blogs but I do remember you complaining about noisy neighbors. I hope the new apartment will have much better tenants than the one you are in. I'm glad you'll have plenty of time to move instead of being pushed to do it all in a day or two. That's not fun and you definitely spend several days recouping from it. I hope the new move will help to relieve some of your stress. People tell you all the time to not let stress get to you but that's easier said than done. I'm glad you got some help when you had a flare up of mental health symptoms.

    It's nice you can go to your dad's and sleep when you want/need to. It sounds like it's the one place you always feel safe and comfortable.

    Good for you getting back into tracking your food. It is a good way to help you stay on track.

    Wishing you all the best with your new apartment and for the future. emoticon
    35 days ago
  • IGSBETH
    Wow, you sound very busy. I hope things get better soon.
    35 days ago
  • SLIMMERJESSE
    Sorry to hear you have had such a tough time. Wishing you much better days ahead.
    35 days ago
  • BJAEGER307
    What a time you have had. I am wishing for you all the best with the new apartment, I'm hoping that this one is much quieter and you have better neighbors. Also I am hoping that all this stress goes away for you, as it seems to trigger all of your other problems. It is hard to control this and very understandable that medical intervention was needed desperately for you.

    I'm glad that you are aware of what yo have to do to get yourself back on track of where you want to be, as it is another step for you to be as healthy as you can be.

    Sending you all the good vibes the universe has to offer. Take care of yourself as best you can. emoticon
    35 days ago
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