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Holding myself accountable.

Friday, July 10, 2020

I know I'm in good company, but damn, I really didn't expect myself to regain 15 lbs during this pandemic! The crazy part is that my life didn't really change, so I don't have that as a valid excuse. I'm currently a stay-at-home-mom, spending my days hanging out with the coolest almost-two-year-old ever. My pre-pandemic life wasn't really much different than my current life, but I *still* managed to scarf my way to a 15 lb gain.

I was killing it (50 lbs down), doing double workouts everyday, sticking to a strict diet 6 days/week, with a fun cheat day every Saturday, dropping weight like a boss. My downfall started slowly. It wasn't that I suddenly decided to just eat whatever I wanted. No, it was more subtle than that, which, ironically, is probably why it got out of hand before I realized what was happening. I started adding things back into my diet that I purposely eliminated or drastically reduced (carbs and dairy, mostly). Then I stopped counting every calorie. Then we'd have an extra cheat meal, which let to an extra cheat day. Next thing I know, I'm staring down at the number on the scale with more than a little disgust.

$hit happens. I'm still down 35 lbs overall and I'm incredibly relieved that I caught this before I regained all of my weight (and then some). So instead of pretending it didn't happen, I entered my updated weight in the tracker and am getting back to work. It might take a few weeks to get back to where I was, but so what? It's not a race. Am I disappointed in myself for such an epic fall of the proverbial wagon? Sure am. Am I going to beat myself over it? Nah. I'm going to get back to a healthy diet that works best for my goals and needs and remain damn proud of the 35 lbs I've still lost. I lost almost 100 lbs 8 years ago, and that journey was not without its ups and downs, both emotionally and on the scale. This temporary gain is nothing a little work and a lot of determination can't handle.

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