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Grief Awareness

Wednesday, August 26, 2020

Coming up this weekend, National Grief Awareness Day is 30 August. Grief affects everyone’s life. I think I have had an average amount in my own life.

The first time I had to deal with grief was when my parents split up when I was 10. The next time was about 4 years later when the dog I grew up with died.

My first husband (father of my two children) died of cancer in 1999. We had a rocky relationship due to many factors, but I still loved him and miss him and love it when he shows up in my children’s posture or speech or gestures. He would have been so proud of them both.

My brother died in 2009 at age 34 in a BASE-jumping accident. He was almost 20 years younger than me so we did not grow up together, and though it was hard for me, it was even more tragic for my dad & step-mom.

I was 60 when my mom died and 65 when both my dad and mother-in-law died last month, all were natural (and not COVID-related) and expected.

Our most recent two dogs died in 2011 and 2016. I still miss them and hope we can get a dog or two when retire and no longer live in an apartment.

One of the most difficult losses for me was a week before my grandson was born, in December 2017. My best friend, Judith, was struck and killed by a car as she crossed the street a block from her house. Because it was so sudden and unexpected, it has taken me longer to grieve.

Many of us and those around us have more grief than usual at this time during the pandemic. Plus it has been made more difficult by having to distance from loved ones when we would normally rely on healing touches and embraces. Our loss of normal life is also something we grieve.

Each time a new loss comes, all the others come flooding back, and I process more each time. Grief has changed me for the better. I believe I have more empathy for others and greater appreciation of each day.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CATHYSFITLIFE
    You have experienced a lot of losses over the years. I too have lost many loved ones as well as pets. A sudden death can be especially difficult. Each loss, especially if they are close together, can compound your grief. I agree that all of the losses we deal with over the years can make you into a better and more empathetic person. It also makes us appreciate each day we are alive and all that we have to be grateful for. I am sorry for all of your losses and the losses each of us have had to deal with. emoticon emoticon
    92 days ago
  • CHALLENGER15
    Such wise words and they mirrored what I am realizing in my own life. My family lost my brother and my mom six months from each other in the past year, and with the passing of my dad years ago, it has hit me extremely hard that just half of my family that I grew up in is still living. I think I have made progress in coming to terms with what I experienced, etc and then just out of the blue there is something new.

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    92 days ago
  • BEFIT020
    So sorry for your losses!
    95 days ago
  • INGMARIE
    emoticon Thank you for a great blog.
    You have had you share and more of grieving . emoticon
    96 days ago
  • CATLOVER110
    I'm sorry for your losses. emoticon
    96 days ago
  • QOALESLEY_62
    Grief is a process that we have to go through with each death and yes, you relive every single one while you process the new one. I am sorry for the losses you have endured. emoticon
    97 days ago
  • CANDOK1260
    sorry for your loss
    97 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/27/2020 4:18:03 AM
  • LPORTER2015
    Such a wonderful blog expressing your experiences related to grief. It's difficult to talk about and deal with.
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    97 days ago
  • AMYBELLES
    Ann, you have experienced a lot of loss over the years. It doesn’t ever get easier, does it? It is so hard to deal with a sudden tragic death from an accident, but also so hard to see a loved one suffer from failed health or a disease like cancer. I do agree that grief can change you for the better, as we appreciate each day and keep the memories close to our hearts, and also can reach out to others with empathy. emoticon emoticon

    97 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/26/2020 9:23:25 PM
  • LINDA!
    I am so sorry for your losses. I know that grief is tough. I have lost my parents, a sister in law and more. Sending you hugs. emoticon
    97 days ago
  • JEANKNEE
    Have to agree with you that deeper empathy can be a benefit of grieving. The losses grieved can instill a strength in us.

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    97 days ago
  • DI_NAMIC
    Thank you for sharing such an honest and thoughtful blog. My much-loved father died when I was 18. I was really angry with the world for a while - and then I set my goal to achieve what I felt would have made him proud. I really sympathise with your losses and greatly admire the perception and strength you have gained. All the best. Diana
    97 days ago
  • NEW-CAZ
    What you say is wise Ann, each loss compounds the grief of other losses and sometimes its just too much to bear but it does instill an understanding for other who have lost someone close, or a much loved pet.
    I like that you have empathy for others, I've always seen it in you though.
    It is a strength.

    97 days ago
  • NEPTUNE1939
    emoticon
    97 days ago
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