ANGEISBACK
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Figuring things out....

Tuesday, October 06, 2020

Hi all!

Hope all is well, your all staying safe...and sticking to your goals!

Today is my Birthday! I am now 48...and to say that I went thru a lot in my 48 yrs is an understatement...I could truly write a book and if I told all about what I have gone thru people's head's would spin and not understand why I am still standing.....but we won't get into all that I don't think there will be enough room on the spark blog for it .....lol

Over the weekend my Uncle contacted me to tell me that his cancer is back he fought it last summer and got half his lung taken out....and now it is back and was given the span of MAYBE he will see Christmas...Cancer is huge on both sides of my family from every cancer u can think of and it does scare the crap out of me as every yr we loose another family member to Cancer..

My Uncle does not talk to the remainder of the brothers/sisters on my mom's side ( there is only 4 left) except my one Aunt...I contacted her to let her know what was going on ....
My Uncle and Aunt discussed what his wishes are he wants to be buried where my parent's are my nana(him mom) and my uncle(his brother) but can not afford the plot etc and can't be close the rest of the family...SO we decided he will be buried in my nana's plot...
Since he lives like 15 min from me I will be the one dealing with the most part of the last little bit of his life and what happens afterwards....I will keep his remains with me until Winter is over and the ground can be dug up to lay him to rest....

Growing up my parents were so hard on me and drilling stuff in my head that kids should not have to worry about or know what it is and I could not understand why I needed to know all this stuff ....but seeing how the last 4 yrs have been for sure all that stuff is clicking in now I need to be the one to handle and deal with things ...between loosing my parents so closely together , to my mom's sister trying to kill herself a yr later, to now my uncle.....

Not sure how much more my mental state can handle anymore...not sure why things seem to be on my shoulders.. but he is FAmily and No one deserves to die alone , and no one deserves to not be at peace for themselves ..So I will do what I need to do...

I know a very deep blog , Just need to get thoughts out of my head so I can enjoy the rest of my Birthday!

Keep safe all!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • STILLSPARKLEIGH
    BLESS you big beautiful heart.... your uncle is blessed beyond measure having you to walk this final part of his earthly journey beside him. I pray PEACE 🙏🏻 over you and him. HUGS and Happy Belated Birthday 🎂
    57 days ago
  • STILLSPARKLEIGH
    Awe hun.... I sure hope you did some celebrating .... you look AMAZING at 48 years young.... and I know when life settles out some you will experience happiness and lightness... but it’s a heavy and somber time n the world, and in your family. God
    57 days ago
  • LORI-K
    Hugs, and prayers, hun! I’m so sorry to read of your Uncle’s cancer and that a huge responsibility will be placed on you in his final days, and beyond. You’ve been through so much, like you said.
    I wish you comfort and peace. And offer you a shoulder and an ear anytime you need one.

    I do hope you have a good birthday, celebrating YOU and your special day.
    You are amazing.
    Hugs.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    58 days ago
  • RD_NEIL
    Have a wonderful day!
    58 days ago
  • MSMOSTIMPROVED
    Big hugs to you birthday doll! I’m sorry you had such sucky news on your special day. Enjoy the rest of it!
    59 days ago
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