Looking for My Inner Strength
Friday, October 23, 2020
I have been doing pretty well BUT those nagging doubts are starting to creep in so I need to put these thoughts on paper where I can see them and put them in perspective. I have been at my goal weight for 28 weeks (6 1/2 months). This is my second time around and after failing so miserably the first time--I am determined to succeed this time. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to adjust to maintenance for the long term. I know I need to continue to track and measure my intake--that is key for me. Lesson learned. I know I need to continue with regular activity and exercise and that is such a habit now (except for ST--still working on that) that I am not concerned about sustaining that part of a healthy lifestyle. What does concern me is how I have been feeling lately. When I started in maintenance, I was hesitant to add back in calories to stop losing weight and I was afraid I'd add too many and start gaining. Slowly, I did feel more comfortable adding a few calories, preferring to stay at the lower end of my calorie range. My weight has stabilized and I had been feeling very confident that I am and will be a success story. However, it has only been 7 months so far and I am a long way from being able to say I've lost the weight and kept it off long term.
I have noticed that lately, my motivation is faltering. My mind has been telling me "go ahead and have that piece of candy--you deserve it". And another part of me says "remember what you want more than you want that candy". All through my weight loss process, I did not deprive myself and I was able to stick to just one piece of candy or one cookie but for some reason......I am finding it harder and harder to stick to "just one". I am afraid that one will become two and then two will become three and then the pounds will start piling on. I knew this stage would be hard. I thought I had it all under control. I am starting to have my doubts.
I am reminding myself of my "why". I am looking at before and after pics to remember where I was and where I am now. I am continuing my healthy habits. I am reaching out to others for support. I am baring it all here to acknowledge and face my reality. I use distraction and activity and water to prevent overindulgence. I am concerned it won't be enough. I remind myself to take this one day at a time, to make one good decision after another. Relax. Breathe. Carry on.