I do not want to be the woman who lost weight
Friday, June 29, 2012      12 comments

You have to understand, I was always the fat girl and I did not diet or yo-yo. Then I lost 80 pounds. Thus I became the woman who lost weight. I got lost in the fog of all the accolades that brought. Then life happened as it always does. My... Read more
Embrace the suck
Wednesday, June 27, 2012      6 comments

All of you, who have found an exercise you love, go do it. This blog isn’t for you. This blog is for me and any fellow travelers for whom the truth goes something like this: Exercise sucks! Off the top of my head I can think of twelve t... Read more
I’ve seen XL from both sides
Thursday, June 14, 2012      11 comments

Losing 80 pounds meant at one point, XL, was a triumph. XL was not shopping in the “plus sizes.” XL was a milestone, I cherished and celebrated. Then I learned how small I had to be to reach a healthy BMI. Medium. Smaller than I was in high... Read more
You know when you have a really good excuse, you think it is a reason?
Saturday, June 11, 2011      13 comments

There is NO reason to act against your better judgment to move away from your own truths to stop exercising (unless you are injured) to be careless with your nutrition Yet I used the excuse of an extremely difficult situation to... Read more
2010 Bisbee 1000, my second time
Sunday, October 17, 2010      9 comments

The difference this year made was not the difference I was expecting. I expected to be all gung ho and maybe moving like a real runner. Instead, this year the race felt harder and I finished 10 minutes slower than last year. My strained calf mus... Read more
Does everyone else know what they look like?
Tuesday, September 28, 2010      20 comments

I mean is everyone else asking their sweetie to look at other women in the store, on the street, at the park, everywhere and tell them if that person is about their size. In a whisper: “Quick, the woman behind us in the pink shirt, is she my siz... Read more
It's the creep
Wednesday, May 05, 2010      20 comments

And no, I don't mean the co-worker who is driving you nuts. It's the mindset that seems to think that everything is "a little" and "it won't matter." Suddenly your calorie count has crept up to 2,000 (or at least that is where I stopped c... Read more
Maintenance isn't rocket surgery either!
Thursday, March 18, 2010      19 comments

I was writing to a Spark Buddy who is perilously close to reaching maintenance and starting to get that worried feeling. Hey I was there worrying my heart out in December. The fear hiding under the bed, the monster screaming that it will all be ... Read more
One Year on Spark
Friday, March 05, 2010      15 comments

Well, today is one year. One year on Spark People. I’ve been struggling trying to figure out what I want to write to mark this anniversary. Struggling because everything seems so ordinary. When people compliment me or gasp at my new shape, I th... Read more
It makes you look like the broad side of a barn
Sunday, February 21, 2010      32 comments

OMG, I'll really going to write a blog about plaid. My love of plaid started young and quickly morphed from the love of vibrant colors and pattern to the love of the illicit. I can still remember every detail of my 4th grade lunch box with ... Read more
Active. On. Purpose.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010      9 comments

You know it must be January when the entire front of Marshall's is full of athletic wear. Fortunately, for me, the clearance section also had fitness wear. Since losing weight (size 18W to size 8) all of my disposable income (except for the part... Read more
New Fears (lying sacks of untruths)
Tuesday, January 12, 2010      9 comments

Now that I have hit maintenance new fears have reared their ugly heads taunting me. Apparently these fears are making the rounds and taunting other newly-arrived maintainers. Apparently you can have success and still think it is a fluke. The fea... Read more
When done doesn't feel done
Sunday, January 10, 2010      10 comments

Maybe I'm just not ready to be in maintenance. Maybe after a lifetime of dieting, failing at dieting, being the fat girl I'm really not done. What if it is easier to be in love with the struggle than celebrating the victory? You know the st... Read more
My blog for Us: the clueless ones
Saturday, January 02, 2010      15 comments

I have hesitated to write a "I've reached my goal" blog because I'm pretty clueless. I've lost 80 pounds since Oct 2008, 48 of them on Spark since March 2009. And I did it without truly believing or even knowing what it meant. As a lifelong fat ... Read more
Lost in the forest
Thursday, November 12, 2009      7 comments

I'm just gonna ramble here for a minute. For my birthday, Sue took me shopping and I got 3 new pairs of pants. ALL of them size 8, including the jeans. I laid the jeans out on the bed and just stared at them. I've put them on twice to make sure ... Read more

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