80,000-99,999 SparkPoints 99,715


That's it. I've had enough. I'm giving up today.
Friday, August 07, 2020      7 comments

That’s it. I’ve had enough. I’m giving up today. This journey’s just been too damn rough I’m throwing it all away. I’m so exhausted from the back pain And the heartburn keeping me up at night My poor body, strain after strain An... Read more
First Week Back
Saturday, April 25, 2020      4 comments

Tuesday April 21, 2020 Calories:1609 Exercise: Walk 1.33 miles in 30 minutes; 2.67mph This about how you want to look and feel 6 months from now. What small steps can you make today to make that vision of your future self a reality? S... Read more
Bucket List
Monday, April 20, 2020      2 comments

Think about 3 things that are on your bucket list. What goal would you go for if anything was possible? What can you do to feel like that in your life today? 1. Retire 2. Grow & can my own food 3. Participate in sporting events (and/or cre... Read more
It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times
Tuesday, December 03, 2019      4 comments

My intensive out-patient therapy was shutdown in mid-November, so once again I'm without. I'm still having too many flashbacks of being illegally detained. But I am practicing what I learned in the out-patient group. We said goodbye to our ... Read more
2019 is Cursed
Saturday, October 05, 2019      4 comments

Reasons this year is cursed: I was illegally detained at a mental hospital Our wife left us a month ago and it's been an awful experience (to put it MILDLY - I have A LOT of hurt & anger) One of our ex-wife's sugar gliders (Niffler) pas... Read more
Binge and Recover
Saturday, July 06, 2019      9 comments

July 6, 2019 I had two to three days of unhealthy coping (eating). I’ve been in group therapy since April and on Wednesday we discussed self-care, mental, physical, and spiritual. Since I lost my faith a few years ago, I don’t know how to c... Read more
March 25-31, 2019
Monday, April 01, 2019      1 comments

This week did not go as expected. That might just be the biggest understatement I've ever written. As some of you know, I've been trying to get help for my mental health for some time now. I am safe. I just don't know what the hell happened this... Read more
March 18-24, 2019
Monday, March 25, 2019      3 comments

Monday March 18 My eldest cat, Hobbs, got locked out of my room last night and woke me around 2am. I couldn’t fall back to sleep, so at 3:15 I got up to go for a swim. I went into the swim with almost no expectations (okay, so I figured a soli... Read more
Live Like You're Dying
Friday, January 18, 2019      3 comments

I feel like it’s getting easier today. I still want binge foods, but the siren call is softer, more distant. Today is day 14 of being binge-free. I’m still obsessing over food, but I’m putting love into my healthy meals instead of resentment. ... Read more
Craving, but 10 Days Binge Free
Monday, January 14, 2019      7 comments

I’m sitting at the attic window, looking out at the forest and rain. I have a well-loved book in my lap and a mug of hot chocolate in my hand. I’m healthy and comfortable in my body. Downstairs, soup is in the crockpot for lunch. I’ll eat with m... Read more
I Embrace Stable
Monday, January 07, 2019      2 comments

Today is day three of being binge-free. I've been rereading my old blogs from when I started on Spark. I've decided to restart Spark's 30 Day Walk This Way Challenge. In addition to being addicted to food, I've definitely been addicted to exerci... Read more
Food Addiction & General Update
Friday, December 28, 2018      5 comments

I've been... out of control? It's a good thing I've never done drugs, because I definitely have an addictive personality. My drug? Food. I don't care if some people don't believe food addiction is real. That's fine. I know myself and I know my b... Read more
I Am Warrior
Monday, November 19, 2018      6 comments

I Am Warrior I am a 4am warrior I am a 5am swim I’m a survivor, a thriver In every limb I am a fighter The demons won’t win I am a dragon A shark, watch the fin I am an athlete My strength knows no bounds I am reco... Read more
Self Care is NOT Selfish
Wednesday, November 07, 2018      8 comments

I'm doing a lot better now. I'm getting more in tune with myself. And I'm FINALLY kicking the cold I caught last week. I've decided to slow down my weight loss and really learn about my choices and why I sabotage myself. My goal for this ye... Read more
Self Harm Contract - Second Round
Monday, October 08, 2018      4 comments

This worked really well last time, so here we go again. Self Harm Contract I, puppybug, agree to perform everything as outlined below. I will refrain from self-harming for the next 12 weeks, from October 8 through December 30, ... Read more

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