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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/20/19 5:48 A

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yeah I agree, not making friends at work and Trump overweight?

PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/20/19 1:23 A

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That too!

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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SYLPHINPROGRESS's Photo SYLPHINPROGRESS SparkPoints: (109,372)
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8/19/19 9:45 P

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Politics politics, ugh.

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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/19/19 9:17 P

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Office politics - ugh!



"Dance as if no one is watching."


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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/19/19 4:22 P

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Admittedly, I exaggerated a tad to make his height conform to his weight. His doctor, though, has been under serious scrutiny.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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SYLPHINPROGRESS's Photo SYLPHINPROGRESS SparkPoints: (109,372)
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8/19/19 4:15 P

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Five inches? Are you referring to his hands? Wait, that would mean he gained four, not five, inches in horse/hand measurement. Now we know for sure that he can't keep his own lies straight.

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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/19/19 10:18 A

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But Trump is not overweight. His MD said so.

Especially since five extra inches were miraculously added to his height.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
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SPORTSPHOTOG's Photo SPORTSPHOTOG SparkPoints: (77,526)
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8/19/19 9:15 A

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The example got set by the buffoon in the White House who recently told an attendee at one of his rallies to lose weight. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.



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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/19/19 6:28 A

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Working in any place, in any position, is a minefield (if you are not the boss), in my opinion. You really cannot make real friends until after you leave. If then.

Sad, isn't it?

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/19/19 6:08 A

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yep I agree that I don't know the whole story and I work there. We have one employee that several of us believe should not be working there but still is -- most likely because she is "besties" with the supervisor.

NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/19/19 4:32 A

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Agreed. I had a colleague who, after I left, lost her husband unexpectedly, and the boss refused to let the team go to the funeral, because the work was paramount. One woman I spoke with, was particularly upset with that decision. Who does this?

Or they had a beef with this employee and were happy to be rid of her.

You really never know what goes on behind the scenes.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/18/19 9:37 P

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Yeah, it might have been that they had parties at one time, until someone decided it took too much time away from work. So then they figured they'd give the leaving employee the cake and let them enjoy it - something like that? I could see that happening in some places I've worked.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/18/19 9:12 P

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You never know what the politics behind all this is. Somehow I don't think we know the whole story.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/18/19 7:43 P

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Yeah, you'd think maybe the supervisor would organize a small going away party with the cake instead of giving each person leaving a cake and cupcakes. It would make more sense.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/18/19 7:06 A

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yea we don't. It was not really a "party" just a going away card and gift. any way I kept my mouth shut. that is the important thing. me suggesting I buy the next "going away" gift from all of us wwas just an idea. although I could give the person a gift just from me.

NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/18/19 7:02 A

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Right, Phebe. Way too much mental illness out there. Seems she was overwhelmed taking care of her child. But the response was so abnormal.

Considering the tenor of the times, I'm lucky to be here.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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SYLPHINPROGRESS's Photo SYLPHINPROGRESS SparkPoints: (109,372)
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8/18/19 5:45 A

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Good point about the cake being party food rather than a gift, Gail.

Maybe it would help to carry cupcakes around to offer the sane-looking people who go ballistic at the sound of another person's existence.

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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/17/19 11:25 P

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Nu, you started out thinking these people were normal and average. No way to know until sometimes too late.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 10:27 P

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Phebe, considering people have died for less, I was stupid.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

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ECOAGE's Photo ECOAGE Posts: 13,176
8/17/19 9:49 P

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emoticon or emoticon , size XS or XXXL, it does not matter when giving an employee a gift.

A cake at a good-bye work party? That's not a gift. It's party food. It's for the everyone attending the party even if the pretty cupcakes go home with the departing employee! Does the departing employee also take any remaining cans of soda, napkins, and paper plates!!!

A gift should be a departing message to say "thanks for your work and we will miss you". The same gift for everyone is fine if it is intended as a small keepsake and a token of appreciation. Only a bride keeps a small version of a cake in the freezer for a year!!!

Gwyn, from what you've said before, it doesn't sound like your supervisor and you have the kind of relationship where you could offer your suggestions. I think keeping your thoughts to yourself is the best idea.

And when you leave your job, enjoy your good-bye party, have a piece of cake, take your own personal belongings, and go home to celebrate leaving. If it was me, I'd ask for any remaining cake and the cupcakes to be shared with the clients (assuming they aren't invited to the party?). And I'd save a lot of the cake for the overnight staff.

It takes a long time to grow young. - P. Picasso

Gail
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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/17/19 9:05 P

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I'm surprised they didn't yell "Don't you know who I am???"

Because obviously they are SOOOOO much more important that anyone else in the world.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 8:41 P

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Phebe, I could not open the door, just a wedge. She clearly knew I was there because I tapped her gently with the door. It did nothing. She was psycho. And then when the other gentleman tapped their car her SO went nuts on him. The pattern was there.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 46,383
8/17/19 7:13 P

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Gwyn, you can't do anything about what the supervisor chooses for a gift, as everyone else has said. It seems as if this is her standard gift, so all you can do is ask, when you stop working there, that she NOT get the cakes for you.

Although offering to choose the next gift is a great idea, but the supervisor may or may not go for that option - she may have other reasons for always choosing the cake, such as she gets a free cupcake with each cake purchased. (See, that's why I'd go buy someone a cake, LOL!)

Nu, that person sounds truly crazy - and if she couldn't figure out she was in the way, she's also stupid. People like that are so annoying!

I usually say excuse me twice, louder the second time. If people don't move by then, I usually brush by which means bumping them - no one has ever commented, but one time, the two women were still standing outside talking when we left. I asked if they needed a ride, they said no, they were old friends catching up. I said I bumped them when I was walking by because they didn't hear me say excuse me a couple of times, but that I could see they were deep in conversation and that I couldn't figure out how else to go around them. The lady I bumped (also big, with a giant purse) smiled and said that yes, they were talking so much she didn't hear me. So it was sort of a subtle apology on both our parts - her for not moving, me for bumping her.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


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NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 6:57 P

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TSA agent was just fired for passing a note to a man he just screened that said "You ugly."

People never cease to amaze me.

Edited by: NUMD97 at: 8/17/2019 (22:23)
Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/17/19 6:38 P

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next time I will offer to buy the "good by " gifft. and one time, when downtown St. Paul walking through the food court, about 30 pounds heavier than I am now, I said "excuse me" to a woman standing in line for food. I accidenetly rubbed against her and she turned around and stared and then said "oh she's fat" referring to me. I just kept walking

NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 6:11 P

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Sure.

After the fact it is always easy. I was in Boston this week on business and I was going to pick up a colleague at the airport in Massachusetts. I stopped at the last rest stop and a young lady who was parked next to me was on the phone. I couldn’t open the door because she was standing in the way and stupid me I thought this was a simple thing to do so I said "Excuse me". No response. "Excuse me." No response. That went on about three or four times. I tapped her gently with the car door and still no response. Finally she screamed "I am on the phone! Just say excuse me." I said "I said it five times." "I'm taking care of my baby! You can %^**%# ing wait!"ť The spot in front of me became available and I slid the car in there. Meanwhile the car next to me now had accidentally tapped their car. And her significant other was just as crazy as she was. I didn't quite see the accident, but it was apparent that he barely tapped it. And he even said to me later "I apologized to him." He was smart to take a picture of the so-called damage. These days you need the cell phone for more than just making phone calls. Later I realized I was stupid to even engage her because apparently they were off balance. And it could have escalated and become something much, much worse. So bottom line: Pick and choose your battles.

Every time they talk about gun control and improvements in the laws, I always scream at the TV not to forget mental health screening as well.

Edited by: NUMD97 at: 8/17/2019 (22:27)
Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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SYLPHINPROGRESS's Photo SYLPHINPROGRESS SparkPoints: (109,372)
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8/17/19 6:03 P

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Nu's suggestion to volunteer to pick a gift is perfect.

I hope that I've never told anyone "You should lose weight." If I'm guilty of anything, it may be for having told someone to be taller or shorter.

We all know the people who "mean well." Something doesn't compute with them. People who mean well do well.

LAURIE, NYC

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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/17/19 5:50 P

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thanks

NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 5:25 P

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You’re always safe here, Gwyn.

Edited by: NUMD97 at: 8/17/2019 (17:25)
Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/17/19 5:13 P

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I am proud of myself for keeping my mouth shut and not saying anything at all. All my life I have been told "lose weight" "be careful of what you eat" "don't eat that" etc etc etc. I was just frustrated that is all and wanted a safe place to say my feelings.

NUMD97's Photo NUMD97 Posts: 10,276
8/17/19 4:38 P

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Agree 100% with Laurie: You can never chastise a boss for the “poor choice” she made.

If you feel this strongly about the matter, when the next person leaves, you can volunteer to help choose/buy the gift. And then leave it at that.

Situations like this one can easily blow back and hurt you. In these times it is just not worth it.

Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.
~ Goethe

Dare to dream.
~ Me


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SYLPHINPROGRESS's Photo SYLPHINPROGRESS SparkPoints: (109,372)
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8/17/19 4:32 P

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I would stay out of it or at least I think I would control the urge to speak up. For someone to tell the supervisor that the cake was a poor choice for the particular employee is to judge what the employee should do or should want for herself. (It certainly would be in the employee's best interest to lose weight, but that ball is in her court.)

If she'd been working on losing weight or had expressed a desire to do so and had made it known around the office, then it certainly was a bad choice. In this case, I might make suggestion to the supervisor for an appropriate gesture the next time someone who has a particular concern or goal leaves the job.

In general, I don't see cake as the greatest plan. A gift that fits the departing person's personal interests makes more sense to me - something enjoyable that will also be a reminder of former co-workers and the job.

Edited by: SYLPHINPROGRESS at: 8/17/2019 (16:34)
LAURIE, NYC

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GWYNANNE1's Photo GWYNANNE1 Posts: 4,805
8/17/19 3:49 P

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I work with disabled individuals and our agency recently lost 3 employees. Each one received a gift - - and that gift was a small nicely decorated cake with six cup cakes with same decoration. One of these individuals is extremely obese -- I think she must weigh between 350 - 400 pound (my guesstamate). The person who chose the gifts was our supervisor, a person with a degree in Social Work. I bit my tongue so I would not say anything, but inside I was thinking why would this Social Worker give an obese individual a cake as a farewell gift? someone I go to the gym with says that is enabling this individual. please let me know what yo u people think

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