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JIM1MICHAEL2's Photo JIM1MICHAEL2 Posts: 3,142
5/30/10 7:38 A

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When I was first married, many years ago, my husband was in retail. He was an excellent manager who they used to clean up failing stores. So we moved alot. 14 addresses in 7 years of marriage. I saw a lot of miserable wives along the way. They always wanted to be somewhere else, close to their families, near their favorite stores, etc. I made up my mind that no matter where I lived (and I did live near Alpena, a nice town, and did Christmas shopping there) that I was going to make the most of it. You have to. It's where I landed and if I wanted to be happy, I just found the good things about the area. The first couple weeks, after settling the house, I'd load up the babies and take a different route and just drive. You'd be surprised what you can find.

I agree with so many prev comments; your boyfriend may VERY WELL be working on his career and want YOU to do the same. 2 years is not that long when you factor in the benefits you mentioned. You've managed all your college years - accepted and faced many unknowns. Get out your big girl pants and go for it, Dearie. This may be the best opportunity for you to jumpstart your career. margi.

You go to the new place with a mindset that it's going to work, you're going to enjoy the town and the people. emoticon

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12/6/72 - 2/23/73

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5/30/10 7:04 A

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So many things to consider! On the financial side it sounds like a good move. I made a move from a large city to my small hometown about ten years ago. I love the pace here and and we have a wonderful Y and I have walking routes in the tree-lined neighborhoods. As far as your boyfriend the move might be a turning point in your relationship.

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CAROLJEAN64's Photo CAROLJEAN64 Posts: 13,590
5/29/10 10:15 P

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I am tempted just to say "ditto" to everything that is posted already. I keep getting stuck on your problem with exercise. In a small town, you may end up finding some wonderful walking routes or biking routes. You may find a Y or small gym as a place to meet partners to help with exercise. In this economy, it would be hard to turn down a job. Could you make your "weekends" coincide with boyfriend's time off. People might like being able to make appointments on Sat. and/or Sun.

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5/29/10 9:58 P

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Hi Rachel! Winding down is a good thing so long as we don't end up in the doldrums for having done nothing. There are some fun things to do and some very rewarding ones too. Consider reading books you haven't had time for since you were so busy studying. Take up art, or knitting, or crochet. Play games on the computer just for fun. These are inexpensive or cost free and will provide you something besides the mall.

Good for you taking the time to assess you decision on the job. If they pay well, and will help work off the loan I'd think that would be very appealing. Two years is not a terribly long time and you can always move back to the city with experience under your belt, money in the bank and your loan decreased. Kris has a good point that many people decide they actually enjoy the slower pace of a smaller community.

I think the saving from using the free SP Nutrition Tracker and eating healthy food you like would be worth a real consideration since you reference the expense of Jenny Craig. This would be a good time to focus on you in eating and exercise. You'll feel so proud when you start to see the results and they do come pretty easily at first.

Keep posting so we know what and how you are doing. Make June your month!



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5/29/10 9:47 P

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RACHEL I have to agree with KRIS. There is an old saying, "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." In other words, the job you have is better than even two others that you might have. With loan repayments I doubt you can afford to turn down a job at this point, can you? If something better comes along, well, then you can reconsider.
Yes, it will be hard to be away from your boyfriend. However, if he is staying put to pursue his own job, you really need to consider whether you shouldn't be putting your career first as well.
I have seen too many women (okay, me included) who put their own personal growth aside for a guy and regretted it later, and I wouldn't like to see you do the same, especially without a formal commitment between the two of you.
Older and wiser,

Edited by: DWDMOTHERHEN at: 5/30/2010 (16:53)
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5/29/10 9:00 P

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Rachel - I know A LOT of people who have shifted from the city to a small country area, thinking they are not going to like it and only prepared (initially) to work a couple years there. I also know that A LOT of those people came to like the lifestyle soooo much that they have chosen to stay! It is a case of what you have already said "(I am use to going to malls or something if I am bored)".

You will soon get "used to" doing other things in place of that. And you MAY even find that you enjoy it more! In the meantime, look at it as vehicle to get you to where you want to be in the future.

My thoughts are that the slower work pace for you is really EXACTLY what you will need for a while. You have been through tons emotionally, and you really do need to have a proper wind-down in a stress-reduced environment. It is good that you are thinking through the pro's and con's though, but if you haven't other definite job offers, I wouldn't cut off my nose to spite my face, so to speak!

I can't say DO Jenny Craig or DON'T do it! That is for you to decide, but you have pointed out the cost and you do know about healthy nutrition and portion control - and we DO have an excellent Nutrition Tracker to help you (give that you now have a little more free time:-)

Kris xx

Edited by: SLIMMERKIWI at: 5/29/2010 (23:04)
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MOTLEY25's Photo MOTLEY25 Posts: 425
5/29/10 8:46 P

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Now that I am done with school and the test, I have A LOT of time on my hands. Also add to the fact that this is a long weekend and my boyfriend is in another state for work all weekend. This leaves me pretty bored and I have been thinking a lot of the job situation.

I have not been offered the job in Alpena yet but they want me and I should hear next week. I am nervous to takw this job because it is four hours away from my boyfriend and family and it is in a very small town so there would not be much to do. (I am use to going to malls or something if I am bored). So the more I think about the job so far away, the more I think I may be very unhappy there. It would not be bad if I could come home most weekends, but my boyfriend works weekends so that will not work.

Pros of the job: Great pay plus loan repayment. Slower pace as far as patients, less stressful.

Cons: Far away, at least 2 years, since I would be working in an underserved area it would be a lot of extractions (which I do not care for) and very little root canals and crowns (which I like).

I have yet to find something closer to my home town though so I am at a lost as to take this job and suck it up for two years or wait to find something closer.

On a side note, I am hoping to force myself to exercise tomorrow. Yes, I did say force. I have not exercised in I don't know how long (over 6 months). You would think with all of this down time that I would go but I have some large fear or something holding me back.

I also wonder if I should go back on Jenny Craig or just try to eat healthy. Jenny Craig is easy to stick with but it is VERY expensive.

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