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BECKAFANO's Photo BECKAFANO SparkPoints: (26,104)
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11/14/11 12:37 P

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Questions

1. Anger. I only resisted half. I felt even more anger for not resisting completely and I felt distant from God and anxious about coming to God.

2. Asking for help was a big no-no in my family. Especially asking for help outside the family, but even at times inside the family. I tend to put a mask on even though I don't want to and I hate it and I even resent it. Deep down I want help and even recognize that I need help, but can never bring myself to ask for it. I never understood the 'rule' then and I don't understand why I do it now. Food is what I do turn to when I can't find help from any where else. I is the only way I know of soothing a hurt or need I don't think I can get met any other way.

3. Yes I have and I miss it. There is a scripture that says, 'be still and know I am God.' We often ask the questions but don't take the time to listen to the answers when we pray. God want to talk to us as much as He wants to listen.

4. It won't matter / make a difference
You can change latter
Others worked so hard, it's more important to not offend them
What if I miss out on something great
This food only happens on special occasions
Yes because hard times make it easier to revert to old, familiar and automatic habits. That way you have one less thing to think about.

5. I know He always provides a way out for me. My problem is not God or His provisions, but me and my willingness to be obedient in the moment. Often times I can even clearly see the path He has created for me and I purposely turn my back on it so I can have food instead.

Never mistake failure as final

Deciding what you want your life to be like is not hard. Deciding what you are willing to do and give up to get it, is the hard part.

I will do what I need to do in order to do what I want to do.

What you do and say is a reflection of who you are, so decide who you want to be and do it.

Rebecka


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BECKAFANO's Photo BECKAFANO SparkPoints: (26,104)
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11/14/11 12:30 P

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'those times when you just don't have it in you to deny yourself unhealthy foods. Life is already denying you so much. For heaven't sake, everything you want seems out of reach but these cookies are right here. - That's exactly it. I feel like life has already taken so much from me over the course of my life - I'm not letting it have anything more - I'm not giving it this too. It's already taken my mom, my childhood home, a good part of my childhood, happiness, dreams and so much more. I'm not voluntarily giving it this too. This thing I enjoy so much.

We get comfortable with our victim status - Did I do it again? Did I fall into the victim trap and loose my real identity again? I've done it before and I hated it. I didn't think it could happen more than once in a life time. I guess I lied to myself again. When I was younger I went to counseling for childhood things, but now that I'm an adult I've fallen for it again. Now I'm living as a victim of depression, anxiety, a broken dream of never having children and I carry around all the things people have said to me that hurt, like a badge made out of sewage. These things are not who I am, but what has happened to me. I'm allowing it to define who I am. I need to determine who I am and who I want to be and move in that direction. Which coincidentally is away from everything else.

'For me, this starts with taking off my mask before the Lord and asking Him to help me find fulfillment in my relationship with Him. This is hard sometimes. Taking off my mask means I have to admit that there's a problem, and I really don't want to do that. - I find that I don't want to admit things to myself. Let alone someone else. I think I have an easier time admitting to Spark friends because it sometimes doesn't feel real. I don't see them, hug them or even know what their voices sound like. So it's easy to pretend like its not actually real.

I know you want me to change your circumstances, Lysa. But, right now I want to focus on changing you. Even perfect circumstances won't satisfy you like letting Me change the way you think. - Changing the situation doesn't change our happiness if we are still looking at it through a bitter, resentful and stubborn heart. However any circumstance can look better if we look at it through a heart of peace and love and Jesus.

I think a lot of us try to get filled up with things or people. I talked about how I walked around for years with a little heart-shaped cup, holding it out to other people and things trying to find fulfillment. Some of us hold out our heart-shaped cup to food. - There are several things wrong with this approach. No one is as big as God is. It puts demands and expectations on others that are impossible and as a result eventually destroys a relationship. We set ourselves up for less than what God desires for us. If we do demand that others fill us up, we exclude God from out lives and often push Him out and/or away.

Never mistake failure as final

Deciding what you want your life to be like is not hard. Deciding what you are willing to do and give up to get it, is the hard part.

I will do what I need to do in order to do what I want to do.

What you do and say is a reflection of who you are, so decide who you want to be and do it.

Rebecka


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ASOBFALLS's Photo ASOBFALLS Posts: 19,078
11/10/11 6:18 P

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emoticon I find it so much easier to offer help than to ask...It is hard to be 'less' than perfect....before God, my husband, my sisters, my SparkSisters.
To remove the mask involves... admit there is a problem and identify it...feeling 'safe' with someone who will accept my mask. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Joyce, a Daughter of the King, that is, a Princess!
leader Christian Women with Depression
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SUNSHINE192DAY's Photo SUNSHINE192DAY SparkPoints: (80,502)
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11/3/11 9:08 A

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When I experience problems or difficult seasons of life, I'm more likely to cling to my mask and try to muddle through. I HATE asking for help!This tendency has impacted my ability to resist food temptations at those times by getting me to make horrible choices. But I'm getting better at this slowly!

Current Team Leader of Every Day is a Merry FITmas team

Current Urgent Prayer Request Forum leader in Keep Walking with Jesus

Former Co-Leader of Christian Women with Depression

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With God all things are possible! Remember that and you're set!

If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. ~C. S. Lewis



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CD8048102 Posts: 119
10/30/11 10:13 P

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Greetings,

I am much more likely to put on a mask and pretend everything is okay when other people are around. At home alone, not so much. However, just because I don’t wear a mask at home doesn’t mean that I ask for help. I think that is the hardest part for me. Not because of the humbling aspect of it though. It is because of the learned expectation that I will either be turned down for help or the promise of help won’t be gone through with. But all of that faded for me when I started going to God for my help. I know beyond a doubt that He will never let me down. As a matter of fact, he has been going above and beyond in this new journey of mine. I feel like Lysa did when she sat down to talk to God about her “tankles”. It was like He was waiting for me to ask and just poured out all the things He had been storing up for me for just that day when I did.

~blckrose~

LITTLEGUYSMOM1's Photo LITTLEGUYSMOM1 Posts: 12,992
10/28/11 4:53 P

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Since I am right in the middle of a despressive episode, coming down off of a hypomanic period, I can say that I try to keep up appearances that everything is okay. When I feel this down, I don't feel worthy of help from my support people, so it is hard to ask for help. After my counseling session today, I realize that I'm going to need to reach out and ask for help out of this pit. I have some homework ahead of me...

I go through spurts of having no appetite to eating everything in sight. When I feel a binge coming on, I try to make a cup of tea and relax before it can take hold, but that doesn't always work. I'm trying to resist the temptation to self-soothe with food and turn to God instead. So far I'm still struggling.

Tina
Team Co-Leader Christian Women with Depression (CWWD)

5% Challenge - Starfish team
North Carolina - Eastern Time Zone

Be still and know that I am God...
Psalm 46:10a


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TIFFANYKING5's Photo TIFFANYKING5 Posts: 94
10/28/11 1:19 P

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I think that when I experience difficult seasons of life I am more prone to pretending like I am ok. Sometimes it is hard for me to let people know I am struggling with anything because I am tired of hearing them complain, so I don't want to complain also to them. But sometimes I think I go too far in that I don't reach out if I need support for something, I am just shut off. This impacts my ability to resist food temptations negatively because I feel like I eat when I don't feel like I can talk to anyone and then I eat to fill the loneliness instead.

I am glad that the question for this post on the chapter was something that caused me to think differently about the chapter than what I wrote in my blog today. It's so good when I can write about what I am learning from the chapter and then come here and it causes me to think about it in a completely different way, from a different aspect of things. :) Thank you!

Here's my blog for this chapter!! :) thisfleetinglife-hope.blogspot.com/2
01
1/10/made-to-crave-study-with-fullneR>ss-of.html


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ANITAHASGOALS SparkPoints: (0)
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10/15/11 4:03 P

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I have the tendency to run with my tail between my legs, and the impact was guilt,
Shame, and lots of weight. Now I'm asking for help, and I'm fighting for God to help me along the way,and seek His help ,and do it with friends

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LITTLEGUYSMOM1's Photo LITTLEGUYSMOM1 Posts: 12,992
10/15/11 8:01 A

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When you experience problems or difficult seasons of life, are you more likely to put on a mask and pretend everything is okay or take off your mask and ask for help? How has this tendency impacted your ability to resist food temptations at such times?

Tina
Team Co-Leader Christian Women with Depression (CWWD)

5% Challenge - Starfish team
North Carolina - Eastern Time Zone

Be still and know that I am God...
Psalm 46:10a


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