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Introduction Text 2017/2018/2020: Back at it for what seems like the millionth time. I could use the excuse of my torn ACL. It is only half the battle. The other half is eating. So here I am. Again. Back at the beginning. Wishing I was back where I was in all of the pictures I am so very proud of in all of my blog posts. But I will be again. I've always enjoyed working out, and exercise. However, there is a big difference between liking it and DOING it. I am DOING it now. And of course still liking it now :) My struggles have come from *eating*. I was a slim child. Over these past 2 decades I have found it so easy to eat more than I should. So easy. Food tastes delicious. However, the term delicious includes different foods now than it did 6 years ago. I now focus on what the foods will do to my body, and how I will accomplish my goals better with the foods I eat. --------------------------------------------------- The answers are not at the bottom of a bag of chips! You will not feel any better eating that pan of cinnamon buns than leaving them be. ---------------------------------------- I do this because this is what I do. No matter if I want to or not. Especially when I don't want to. Some days are easier than others, and some moments are easier than others. I just know that at the end of the day I can look back and be happy about my healthy food choices and workouts. Know how far I've come, and how much work it's taken to get here...and know that it's all worth it. My new normal. --------------------------------------- It's all just part of the journey, all one long road with some smoothly paved sections and some rough and bumpy, rocky ones. There is no wagon. It's just me and the road. My road. For life. ----------------------------------------- ''My point is, when you look like a marshmallow, it doesn't matter if you have a core of steel. Nobody can see it, and they judge you only by what they see. That can hurt, no matter how anti-social you think you are. It hurts a lot when you've come so damn far, yet it still seems a million miles away. That hurt is also part of the price you pay.'' ~Obsidianfire ---------------------------------------- Dear body, I love you. I love that you push on through the real or imagined fatigue in boot camp class- when I don't think I can do it and you prove me wrong. I love how you get me up in the mornings with a shuffle and a promise of weight-loss and coffee to come. I love how you take all of the exercise I throw at you, and sculpt yourself with it. I love how you allow me to do more, hold longer, push a little farther everyday. I love how you work and change with me, especially since I haven't always been so kind to you. I haven't listened when you told me you were full, or how you wanted healthier choices or more exercise, and for that I am truly sorry. I vow to work with you from now on, to shape you into the best body you can be, a body that can even motivate other bodies and turn heads. What do you say body? You in? I knew you would, it's like I can read your mind ;) love, me ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ I like using Sparkpeople for the positive encouragement, motivation, accountability, and the fact that you all are on the same path to health as I am. Although the start date says 2008, I didn't start using this site until July 2011. There's a HUGE difference between hoping and watching it happen in others, and making it happen for oneself. I regained what I lost about a decade ago, and the hardest part is stopping the regain. The best thing about it is knowing where you slide back, what caused it, and not repeating the same mistakes. When you know better, you do better. I would say I did the best I could with what I knew at the time. Then I stopped working out and eating relatively healthy, and ballooned back up and more. Big surprise! What did I think would happen if I went back to my old way of eating and living? It was a slow climb, and it didn't make me feel good. I also didn't have a fitness circle, or any other friends who were into eating healthy or fitness. I went to the gym and back home. Did I stop the backslide? No. I turned a blind eye. Don't let that happen to you. There are many successes I took away from that experience as well. Such as- oh holy heck, lifting is fun and makes a person look smaller than they really are. Also, at that point I traded regular pop for diet pop, which sure is a much healthier choice in my books. However, this time around I will learn from my mistakes of the past and set-up my plan for the future so I can be successful. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As a thin person, I get offered help more often, people are more apt to smile at me, strangers are even more likely to begin random conversations with me or volunteer information. The difference is they exhibit a greater degree of kindness towards me now. The difference is that they are more likely to acknowledge my presence with hospitality. I remain surprised when others show me kindness because I have been trained as holdover when I was obese to not expect it. Society teaches us not to harass or bully but it also teaches us to award kindness on the basis of appearance. -TINASWEEP ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 25 lbs gone- July/11 - started on Spark for reals @ this point 42 lbs gone- Sept 4th/11 50 lbs- Oct 16/11 62 lbs gone- Nov 26/11; again end of Dec/12 75 lbs gone- Jan/12; again Jan 12/13 90 lbs gone- Mar 18/12; again Apr 4/13, again Nov 22/13 97.2 lbs gone- my lowest weight in about a decade- May 4/13 101.4 lbs gone (100 lbs gone!)- May 23/13 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 25ish lbs gone- Sept 16, 2018 (started with a relationship break at the beginning of August 2018) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dear body, I will love, honour, and obey you In sickness and in health till death do us part. Love, me ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ motivational member: Feb 22/12 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jogging intervals: (often 10 min run, 1 min walk, repeat) goal 5: take up running (to outrun the zombies, of course!) -started Oct/11 -couldn't run a lap of the track at my gym. Felt like my lungs would explode. 1k-Jan 24/12 2k-Feb 4/12 3.5k Feb 14/12 5k Feb. 25/12- 40 minutes 4.78k- Mar 8/12- outside, pace 6:49, 32 min 7k- Mar 10/12- 52 min, pace 7:22 5k Shamrock Shuffle Mar 17/12 36:22 pace 7:07 11k Apr 15/12 1:18 5k Apr 17/12 PR 34:18 10k Kidney Fun Run May 5/12 1:13:01 10k S. Marathon May 27/12 PR 1:11:10 10k Boogie June 9/12 PR 1:08:32 5k Mogathon June 23/12 PR 31:36- 21/57 in age category, 88/219 in all 5kers 21.1k river run half marathon Aug 12/12- 2:43 21.1k S Marathon (half) May 26/13- 2:25:24 10k Boogie June/13- PR 1:05 5k Dirty Donkey July 13/13- yes! QCM half Sept/13- 2:36 Colour me Rad Sept/13-done! 21.1k S Marathon half May 25/14- 2:21:30 goal 2: match the intensity and activity of the bootcamp trainer (started July/11- 90% Jan/12) goal 4: get through a d@mned Bosu class (try again in Jan)-done Dec 21/11 goal 6: hold a plank for 1 min at the *end* of an abs workout. done! *20 sec. -Aug 27/11 *23 sec. at end of bootcamp- Sept 7/11; 26 sec. Oct/11; 40 sec. Dec 3/11; 1 min Jan 28/12 1 min 10 sec. May/12 goal 10: do at least 1 full regular push-up *done! Nov/11 (in middle of bootcamp); 4 on Dec 7/11; 10 on Jan 28/12 clap between 3- May/13 (push-up, clap, pushup, clap, pushup) 16 on May 23/13 goal 11: fit size 8's! *started @ size 20- Apr/11; @size 20/22 Penningtons - July/August 2018 *18's- Aug/11 *from 18's-16's- Oct 1/11 *14's Dec/11 *12's Jan 14/12 *8's (as well as 10's from 8 yrs ago- my oh my how vanity sizing has changed) Mar 15/12, March 2013 need to get new pants/jeans- May/13 6's May/13 from Rickis. goal 19: do at least 1 full regular push-up *done! Nov/11 (in middle of bootcamp); 10 Jan 28/12; 15 Apr 17/12; 5! Feb/13; 12 Apr 4/13 ; 16 May/13 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Every breath I take is a breath of freedom from the overweight shackles and lack-of-self-confidence chains. I love this state of freedom. No wishy-washy excuses or justifications. Nothing tastes as good as fit and healthy feels. My new normal. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I don't have kids, I don't have a husband. I don't even have a cat. I have a busy job that overflows out of regular hours and many, many other part-time jobs and boards that I sit on that take my time and energy. I have always loved working out and being active. However, I haven't always BEEN active. There's a difference. MY issue has always been with food. Now I'd prefer to control it instead of before when it was controlling me. I don't have to worry about cooking for anyone else but myself, and making sure I have all the healthy snacks I need and my meals prepped ahead of time. I have no excuses, do I. I don't have anyone else to cook for me, no one else to grocery shop and put junk into my cart. Just me. Better take control of that sh!t then, right? I have to own up to the emotions that come along with life, and deal with them in a productive way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I know I enjoy snacking in the evenings, so sometimes I load enough calories into my evenings so I feel like I am not deprived. No eating after 7pm?! HA. Not me. I eat until midnight some days. I like to snack sometimes, so I make sure I have portioned out snackable foods throughout the day. And I still lose weight. Small meals throughout the day. It works for me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Body fat %- Apr 4/13 - 26.25% http://www.bmi-calculator.net/body-fat-calculator/

goal 1: lose 115+ lbs. goal 2: eat within my optimal range with few to no binges goal 3: increase flexibility-done and continuing! goal 5: take up running (to outrun the zombies, of course!) -started Oct/11, 1k-Jan 24/12, 5k Feb 25/12 10k DONE! Apr 15/12 a half marathon ! DONE! Aug/12 NEW GOALS: 5k: sub 30 10k: sub 1:05 half: sub 2:25 goal 7: do a pull-up unassisted - Mar/14 goal 8: a handstand push-up goal 10: fit size 8's! *started @ 20's Apr/11 *Ricki's 8's Mar 15/12, 6's Apr/14 NEW GOAL: 4's goal 11: compete in a boxing match- May 24/14! 1L 0W :( goal 12: become a boxing instructor

Eat balanced!! This includes: carbs, proteins, fruits, veggies and fats. I count calories. I work with a dietician who set-up my plan. It coincides with Spark's fairly well. *I track EVERYTHING. Well, when I want to lose I track. When I don't track I tend to gain. Blah. *eat 3-4 mini-meals and 2-3 snacks/day-snacks are as healthy as my meals. I've never been big on ready-made foods. I have and will cook most everything from scratch. I started eating around 1900 cals in March/11; as of Mar/13- about 14-1600 cals; Jan/14- 1800 cals due to the physical activity I do. gym- weights, cardio and classes. Workout 5-7 days a week. Woohoo gym! currently: *weights 1-2x a week *yoga at home if I remember *used to bootcamp 2x/week. I had almost 100 lbs to lose and if I could go to bootcamp...you can too. *BOXING 5x/wk ***RUN!*** 3x/wk, more if training for a half

currently 37 years old I think. Too bad our age can't plateau like our weight can, right? 5'8" ...I often wonder how tall people are when I see their pictures on here, so I thought I'd post my height! From Canada. I do this TODAY so my future self will look back and thank my younger self. Even my tomorrow self will thank me. I swear I'm not a flower in real life. I've got some pictures in some of my blogs :)

Reminder to self: 1. What will eating that food give you or do for you? 2. Will it benefit my body to eat that? 3. Would I rather have that piece of cake that will give only temporary happiness and blow my calories clear out of the day/week or be slim, feeling good and happy for the long term? 4. Socially can I just have one bite and be happy or will I eat half the cake/bag? Make the smart choice! 'Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.' 'You are the creator of your own destiny.' 'Yesterday you said tomorrow.' 'Someone who is busier than you is working out right now.' Columbus traveled the world in a sailboat...and you can't get to the gym? 'Make yourself proud.' "Let go of who you were in order to make room for and love who you are now and who you are going to be."

Add a Link I'm living my life and enjoying every moment!
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