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Me and my fiance 2 yrs. ago (@ 135lb)

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Skinnier me (not sure when this was taken) I've gotta be about 125-130lbs. ...wanna get there again!

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I first joined SP in April 2008. I was nearing the end of a very intense final semester of a 3 year college program. From an outside perspective everything seemed to be coming together for me at this point in my life. Secretly, I was falling apart under the stress of it all and on a rampant path of self-destruction.

I was using all the wrong tools to cope with my stress, cigarettes, alcohol and binge eating - I have struggled with bulimia quietly for the better part of 10 years. At a time in my life where my accomplishments were coming to fruition, all I could focus on was how unworthy I felt for being "fat".
I resented myself for letting my weight slip this far, and felt even worse that I was abusing my body with constant binges and purges. I decided that I wanted to lose 20 lbs. to stop the vicious cycle and gain a positive self-image.

I found SparkPeople while searching for a calorie counter on-line. I didn't quite know what I was getting myself into at the time, but I knew I had found something truly unique that had the possibility to change my life.

It quickly consumed my interest. Wow! This could really be it! The tools and resources I need, and the community support. This is Promising. Then, on the third day, I gave up. Like everything I had 'tried' before.

I don't even remember the reason I gave myself at the time. I wasn't ready to face my weaknesses, my flaws or my excuses. I wasn't ready to work hard. In a time of imminent change, this is one that I was not ready to make.

April 2009. It hits me. Bikini season is looming. I am 140 lbs. and feeling chubby. Wait a minute...I was 140 at this time last year, I remember wanting desperately to change that and signing up to a very interesting little site named SparkPeople. I was going to be 28 in 2 months and I haven't met any of the goals I set myself on my 27th birthday!

Frustration and self-loathing were about to set it...."Wait a minute," I realized, "That's not entirely true. I have acheived a goal! I QUIT SMOKING! Oh, and I no longer binge drink on weeknights...Heck, I no longer drink on weeknights." And the weight thing...yeah, I want to change it, but I no longer hate myself for it.

And in that moment, I started to define my health by my successes instead of my failures.

I have been back with SparkPeople since April. My nutritional tracking has not been constant, not near perfect, but it is getting there. I am almost tracking everything every day now. And I am jogging more regularly. I am almost able to run 10km! - something I've never done before! I am on course for meeting a personal goal of running a half marathon in July and a full one (possibly :) at the end of September.

My weight is still 140. I have lost 3 lbs. and gained it back in the past month after a weekend with friends and self-indulgence. But I am eating less crap, more protein, whole grains and much, much more fruit than I ever thought imaginable. My skin is glowing and I am full of energy. I'm even waking up eagerly and without having to fight the alarm clock every morning. And as for the bulimia, I'm valuing my health and my esteem more than that would allow :)

I just joined the FTF challenge and I am ready to take that next step and be totally accountable for transforming into the svelt new shape that I want to attain. I would like to lose 10 lbs by my birthday at the end of June, just as a marker of my will to change and determination to succeed this year. My original goal of 120 lbs. is still on my tracker, but I'm thinking that 125 might actually be a little more physically attractive - and I'm actually really proud of myself for saying so :)

I've got a friend who has come into her own aswell lately and she's been a great motivational support, but I thrive off of positive feedback, so please comment on my page or feel free to drop me a sparkmail!

Happy tracking and I'll see you out there! I'm here to stay!

"Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever." Lance Armstrong

Member Since: 4/8/2008

Fitness Minutes: 4,391

My Goals:
Be 130 lbs. for my champagne birthday

Weigh 125lbs. and maintain by mid-July

Run 10k. race in June
Run half-marathon in July
Run full marathon in September

Have sexy legs to finally buy shorts this summer

Go wedding dress shopping with friends and fam. at end of June

My Program:
Now that the warm weather is here, I'm taking up jogging outdoors. I'm also trying to focus on a diet higher in water, fruit and whole grains, and less on pre-packaged and fast foods.

Personal Information:
hometown: Oshawa, ON

email: daralicious@hotmail.com

Other Information:
That about sums it up for now!

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  • v no profile image ALEXXXK89
    Being HEALTHY and it feels so awesome. Proud of us for overcoming all those obstacles and finding spark people to better ourselves ;-) keep up the good work! I know I can definitely still have moments of struggle, But SP helps so much!
    1954 days ago
  • v no profile image ALEXXXK89
    Thanks for the encouraging comment! I was just reading your info and saw we have some similarities-I was about 140lbs of binges and alcohol, all the unhealthy stuff! I also had an eating disorder prior. This is the smallest I've been while still...
    1954 days ago
    Hey Dara, haven't heard from you in awhile! Hope you are doing well. We miss you.
    4395 days ago
    Just wanted to say Hi! Hope you are having a great weekend!
    4412 days ago
    Thanks so much for the SparkGoodie. It seems as if everyone is doing an awesome job in the challenge and I am just really happy to be a part of it. Keep up the great work! It is really inspirational to see someone like you who has very little weight to lose but still keeps up with the healthy lifestyle that we all should, even once we have reached our goals. You are doing awesome! emoticon
    4431 days ago
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