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Well, where do I begin...? I have struggled with my weight my ENTIRE life. I was a chubby toddler & child. I joined Weight Watchers with my Ma when I was only 10 years old, lost 50# and was honored in St. Louis with the adults who had lost 100#. Gradually, I gained it all back plus more. I graduated high school at almost 200#. My best friend through my teen years thought I actually had an eating disorder because I was always focused on my weight & would put myself down with comments like, "I'm fat. I'm a cow. Shoot me if I ever get 'that' big!" Oh, did I mention I'm 5'1" tall? Right after graduation I started college, saw the man of my dreams & was determined to have him. I joined another program & lost 80#. Did I get the guy? Yes, I did and married him too. My weight began to incline yet again. I yo-yo dieted trying everything I could think of including Formula-3, Nutri-System (twice), Weight Watchers again, Atkins, & the Military Diet. I remember once I lost 30# in one month & my husband disappointedly asked, "that's all? " I vowed I would never diet again, but that was a lie and so was my marriage which ended in divorce. Over 20 years later & several more diet plans, I've continued to struggle, lose & gain even more. About 8 years ago I was able to lose 90#, but unable to find the ability to at least maintain. Sadly, I got to the point that my attitude was like, "I don't care how much I weigh as long as I have clothes that fit me. " Unfortunately, I'm at my highest all-time weight right now. I need to do something. I have to do something. This is not optional for me anymore. As I'm typing this tears are filling my eyes. I'm 48 years old & due to arthritis and a heel & knee injury in addition to my weight...I can barely walk. I dread standing. Just standing. A simple walk, not even a block, and I have trouble breathing, sweat pouring & my heart is pounding "thump-thump, thump-thump" out of my chest. I work, but my clients (young teens) know it's slow going when I'm there. I'm supposed to be an example for them. Im supposed to be their rolemodel. I keep an upbeat & optimistic outlook, but my physical weight is starting to weigh me down mentally & emotionally. I feel like my life is out of control. I have my 88 year old mother who lives with me. I want to be able to care better for her. I don't want her to feel like she's a burden on me. I love her more than anything. I'm at a point in my life where I'm just so tired of simply existing. With my 5'1" frame I'm over 200# overweight. I have to lose the weight & I have to keep it off this time. I have to get healthy. I WANT TO LIVE! Please, I need all of the support I can get. I have no idea what SparkPeople is really about, but I'm hoping for guidance & support. Thanks in advance. *I can do all things through Christ! UPDATED 7-29-18 *****WEIGHT TRACKER***** Official (RE)Start Date: July 29, 2018 Official Start Weight: Goal Weight: Pounds Lost. down 10# β˜† down 20# β˜† down 30# down 40# down 50# down 60# down 70# down 80# down 90# down 100# down 110# down 120# down 130# down 140# down 150# down 160# down 170# down 180# down 190# down 200# ****PERSONAL GOAL TRACKER**** Goal: Date Met: Chair Exercise Stood 30 min (no pain) Walked without pain Walked without a cane Walked upstairs Stood & exercised Did 1 mile walk Did 2 mile walk Did 5 mile walk In size 22 jeans In size 20 jeans In size 16 jeans In size 12 jeans "FEEL" Healthy "FEEL" Organized

Member Since: 8/12/2016

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