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September 2012 at 165 goal

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Me (at 279) and my three amazing kids...James age 9, Samuel age 21 months and Kaleigh age 15 1/2

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP is a SparkPeople Motivator!

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Hello Everyone, my name is Tracy. I have been having a hard time for the past several months now. Here are some of my numbers to try to shorten my description:

Joined SP in July 286 pounds.
In September of 2012, I hit my goal weight of 165 pounds.
In April of 2012 I began running and loved it.
In July of 2012, I ran from start to finish my first 5K. I still loved it.
In December of 2012, I ran each day for a total of 100 miles.
In April of 2013, I began wondering what I was aiming for. I had a hard time keeping my weight in check and wasn't looking forward to my running anymore.

Since then I have been struggling. I have gained about 30 pounds back. I am very unhappy with myself and seem to keep grasping on different things to try to find my lifestyle, but thus far nothing has worked. I have tried running again, but am still finding it feeling like a chore, probably because I am looking at it as a job/chore and I am mad at myself that I am not in the shape I was just a year ago. After months of doing this, I made some new years resolutions, figuring that had to work. I feel like I MUST know what I need to do. But they came crashing down around day 10. I suppose I should note here, I am a food addict and I am pretty sure I suffer from binge eating disorder. I have been thinking for days, I decided that the time I was happiest was when I was active on Spark. I believe it is because I always searched myself and came up with goals and plans to achieve them. I need to do something to keep myself in check. So, here I am back sparking. I also searched my thoughts about starting a new name or coming back to this one. It is kinda shameful to look at what I had done on this old name and feel like I let others but mostly myself down. But then decided that this is what I need to do, go back to this girl who lost the weight, who found the motivation and determination to follow through with making goals and setting plans. I decided it was truly time to live up to my name on spark.....


Member Since: 7/8/2011

Fitness Minutes: 40,738

My Goals:
Get back to my goal weight range of 163-168 pounds.

Find my love for running again.

Run a half marathon.

Get smaller and leaner, not skinny.

My Program:
Eat in my calorie range

Weight lifting 3x a week

Running/cardio 3x a week

Learn that it doesn't have to be all or nothing

Personal Information:
My name is Tracy.

I am 40 years old.

I live in Connecticut, USA.

I am married to my high school sweetheart, have been for 17 years.

I have 3 AMAZING children, Kaleigh, 18, James, 13 and Samuel 4 years.

Other Information:
I love:

my family
my friends
my new home
Big Bang Theory
UConn Huskies men basketball

Read More About TRACYNOTGIVINUP - Profile Information moved here. (Updated January 19)

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 current weight: 190.0 
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  • v JIBBIE49
    emoticon I see your Spark Friend, TARAFROMTX1 is The Motivator of the Day. What an honor. emoticon

    You have been doing fantastic as well.
    2355 days ago
    Sending you a YO, to check in!!!


    2626 days ago
    I am so sorry! I hope the prognosis is good for a full recovery. Wishing you all the best!
    2659 days ago
    Hi Tracy! Haven't heard from you lately. Hope everything is going well. We are getting into gear for a hectic few months. DD1 is packing up next week for the move into their house, then comes Easter and the move. Two weeks later is the bridal shower. Then DD2 has a total of 3 dance recitals between early May and June 1st. Graduation is May 28th. I have to do some sort of graduation celebration in June. The wedding is August 2nd. We have a one day trip to James Madison in July for preorientation and class selection. We may wrap a mini vacation around that. College orientation start August 19 and then DH and I can start appreciating our empty nest. This weekend I hope to spread the better part of 50 bags of mulch, some manure and spade my garden again. I am already tired emoticon .

    Hope to hear from you soon.
    2661 days ago
    What a lot of work! I did not realize Conn had mountains. I guess they are a continuation of the Green Mountains? Or are they the Appalachian? T=Your dessert sounds yummy. I will have to try it. When you say coconut milk is it the kind in a can that is very thick? Or is it the kind in 1/2 gallon cartons with the silk or almond milk products? I spent the afternoon working in the yard. Since it is supposed to rain tomorrow through Tuesday, I wanted to get as much done as I could before the deluge. They are predicting an inch of rain. I now have a back ache from shoveling the veggie garden. I still have delicate dishes to wash but if I don't get to them today that is OK. Every thing else is washed and put away. Talk to you tomorrow.
    2665 days ago
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