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SOMEBODY has been praying for me!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Or, several some bodies and I feel it. I can tell, because when I woke up this morning, my mind felt more clear than it has in several days now!

Yeah, I still feel what I am going through, I still know it has to be dealt with and I still want to get tomorrow over with. HOWEVER, I just have an overall feel better if that makes sense.

This was weird, my husband said he was going to counseling tomorrow with us. I was like, great, you're gonna make fun of me. He asked why and I told him about me taking the blogs, etc... Finally, I just read them to him, all the ones I have ready to print out. Once I read through it all, he was like yeah, I think maybe you should print them out and take for her. HUH? Is this MY husband speaking? He actually told my 2 sons to go upstairs in the middle of me reading them to him. That is when I knew he was really listening and paying attention and taking me seriously.

He apologized to me saying that he thought it could be his fault that I feel like I am weird for feeling the way I do, because in his attempt to keep me from getting hurt, he has always told me not to tell people everything, not to put myself out there, etc... He said it was what he loved about me, but it was also what he hated about me! I told him I realize he only told me those things because he did not want to see me hurt. He has tried to teach me HIS defense mechanism.

THEN, he got up, came over and reached for my hand, pulled me up out of the chair and hugged me tightly for several minutes, saying it would be alright. I think I would have cried, if I had not been in shock! While he was hugging me, I said, "You realize, I have built some walls where you are concerned too? don't you?" he said he knew that and in some instances, he "allowed" me to build those walls and I was puzzled - so he said, it was because he knew he could be a cold hearted SOB and if I had my walls up I would not be hurt as much by him.

So, yeah, it has been a weird, but good? day I suppose?

Well, I gotta take Jarod to work in about 10 minutes, then I can take my Sunday afternoon nap, LOL and then go back to church tonight!

Thanks again for all the support and prayers you all have given me. It has helped so much!

Just keep praying, I really want us to get better as individuals and as a family and not just start, get so far and then all of us run back to our shells, we have done that too many times to count.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    That's fabulous!

    What an excellent talk you had with your husband...

    I love how our world works.
    4746 days ago
    This gives me chills, Shannon. That was a true intimate encounter with your husband . . . what a wonderful gift he gave you in listening, taking you seriously, & responding so warmly.
    4747 days ago
    The Lord works in so many mysterious ways. Again, he has answered another one of my prayers. I will send you an email!
    4748 days ago
    Praise God, Praise God, Praise God!!!!!
    4748 days ago
    Aww... that was so great of him to say what he really feels. That is hard for most men to do. I am proud of him. I teared up a little because I know that was something you really needed to hear.
    4749 days ago
    That video is awesome Maryann! Aww....praise God. I'm so thankful for you girls! He works in wonderful ways...! Somebody is praying for you Shan! Jesus loves you!
    4749 days ago
    WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW!!!!!!!! PRAISE GOD!!!! Your husband must love you so much, Shannon! See? God is working all the angles behind the scenes girlie!!! This just makes me sooooo happy. Monday is going to be GREAT!
    4750 days ago
  • 250STRONG
    I'm glad you had a good day Shannon. I thought of you as I was out "worshiping" on my bike this morning. Keep up the great work!
    4750 days ago
    Oh, and also, go watch this video. Love you, friend!
    4750 days ago
    Ok sweet lady. I'm glad you didn't cried, because I think I just cried enough for the both of us when I first read this. I read this three times and my reactions were as follows: 1 - Tears 2 - Extreme happiness 3 - Absolutely giddy with excitement.

    This is just amazing. Who would ever think this came from your husband? That is so wonderful! What a positive step in the right direction! Just be sure to follow up with him about this in the next day or two at the most. If your husband is like most guys, when they do something that is completely out of their normal nature, it completely shakes them up and makes them insecure if they do not get some sort of positive feedback and reassurance.

    I know my Andrew is like that. If he does something out-of-the-blue like that, I know I have to respond rather quickly once I process it myself. Because if I allow it to go unnoticed, the odds of it ever happening again are very slim.

    Make sure that you give him some type of positive feedback. Let him know how this very good gesture made you feel. Let him know much it meant to you, how much you appreciate it, and how much you love him for it. Make sure you tell him that you're fully aware that both of you have issues that need worked out, but if you can be on each other's side and support each other in love instead of sort of going against each other, you can help each other get past them.

    This is a good thing, Shannon. Do not allow yourself to think anything other than that. If you're anything like me, you'll think on it so hard, you'll try and talk yourself out of the positivity here. You'll start to think that he's up to something, has an ulterior motive, or is just plain crazy. Don't over-analyze and become irrational. Enjoy and appreciate this for what it was and pray that it is a stepping stone for you two. I'll continue to pray for you both and your kids.

    Now that I've written you a book, I'll go now. Happy Sunday!
    4750 days ago
    Sounds like a very good day to me too.
    4750 days ago
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