Of Ladies and PMS

Why is it when it's "that time of the month" all we crave is chocolate and salt??
And not even the healthier dark chocolate, oh no. I want the gooiest concoction of melt in your mouth milk chocolate with any kind of sweeter-than-hell filling that will ooze through my body and plant itself directly onto my gut.
It's been HELL this week trying to eat healthy. Between hormones and cramps my diet has consisted of milky ways and ibuoprofen.
At least logging my food is easy: milky way - servings 24 - breakfast.
DONE!!
And who can even think about exercise when your mid-section feels like an elephant breeding ground???

So here's my PMS diet plan.

Breakfast - try to eat oatmeal, throw up - 0 calories
Lunch - milky way and ginger ale - 360 calories
Snack - 1200 mg ibuprofen - 10 calories
Dinner - soup and ginger ale - 250 calories

Aerobic Exercise - Yell at spouse for something stupid, burst into tears and run and hide under the bed.
Strength Training - Chase spouse with hammer when he tries to console you.
Burns at least 270 calories.

At the end of this, weight gain should be minimal.

And can you believe there isn't a website that shows the number of calories a mood swing burns???